Jealousy and cruelty

Okay, so... I've made friends with a guy I met two weeks ago at uni and we've gotten... Intimate a couple of times. We agreed to just be friends because he's not looking for a boyfriend right now, but there's an ounce of chemistry there and I have started to like him a lot. Thing is, this other guy I sometimes have to be around because we're all in the LGBT group at university used to be his boyfriend, and they broke up a week or two before me and him became close.

Unfortunately, the ex has been acting really jealous since he saw us kissing and dancing one night. First it was just petty things- deleting me as a friend on facebook and ignoring me. He text messaged me to say he didn't hate me, but didn't want to be around me. However, two nights ago we went to a kind of gathering of a large group of us at someone's flat, and then to the pub. My friend got really drunk, and was feeling sick, so I walked him home and kissed him good night then went home myself. Then the ex started texting me asking if I went home with him, and saying now he had 'conviction', and he'd assumed we'd had sex (but I'm a virgin). My friend told me to just try and ignore it. Last night we were all at a club again, and getting really drunk...

Me and my friend were dancing/ kissing/ holding hands etc., and at one point the ex actually shook my hand. But later he started saying things like how he hates me, 'back the **** off', 'you better run'. After a while, the ex's friend grabbed my friend and started dancing with him, and before long they were snogging all night and then went back to his once it was over. Anyway, the ex just cackled at me, and I tried not to act so bothered. I was upset, yeah, but more at seeing how horrible a person could be. Later on I was sitting down with some other friend, and the guy who ended up kissing someone else came over and said he was sorry and felt really bad, I told him it's okay, we're just friends... Ugh, I don't know... I mean, I want to stay friends with him. I want to be more than friends with him. And this has happened...

I don't get it. What the hell is going on? How can I sort things out with my friend, and why could the ex be okay with his friend getting off with him but not me? Argh...

Reply 1

Tsk men.

Let me get this straight:

Your friend's friend has a friend who slept with their friend but you fancy the friend (no not that friend, his friend) and you don't just want to be friends with your friends but more that friends?

Reply 3

qubog

12

Your friend doesn't want a girlfriend so either stop flirting with him and kissing him or get used to the idea that he is going to be with other women too. It really really sucks but thats your choices :frown:

Also, your ex is an idiot. Avoid him

Reply 4

Fluent in Lies

2

qubog

Your friend doesn't want a girlfriend so either stop flirting with him and kissing him or get used to the idea that he is going to be with other women too. It really really sucks but thats your choices :frown:

Also, your ex is an idiot. Avoid him

Where do women come into this. I thought he was gay? :eek:

Reply 5

qubog

12

Oh yeah he's a man! Kissing other men then.

Reply 6

andrewjh009

2

I'm assuming you two are bisexual and this ex is gay, am i correct?

Reply 7

Skinwalker

OP

4

okay... let me try and explain it better...

Mr X is the guy I made friends with and got intimate with and have started to like; Mr Y is the jealous ex, Mr Z is the guy who made a move on Mr X.

Me and Mr X were dancing/ kissing/ holding hands etc., and at one point Mr Y actually shook my hand. But later he started saying things like how he hates me, 'back the **** off', 'you better run'. After a while, Mr Z grabbed Mr X and started dancing with him, and before long they were snogging all night and then went back to Mr X's once it was over. Anyway, Mr Y just cackled at me, and I tried not to act so bothered. I was upset, yeah, but more at seeing how horrible a person could be. Later on I was sitting down with some other friend, and Mr X came over and said he was sorry and felt really bad, I told him it's okay, we're just friends... Ugh, I don't know... I mean, I want to stay friends with him. I want to be more than friends with him. And this has happened...

I don't get it. What the hell is going on? How can I sort things out with my friend, and why could the ex be okay with his friend getting off with him but not me? Argh...

...Developments since that night: texted Mr X to ask if he was okay and if he enjoyed the night; he texted back saying he'd just gotten up at four in the afternoon and gone for food; had really enjoyed it and couldn't wait to go again. I asked if he was going to a party we'd been invited to but haven't heard from him since. Mr X added Mr Z on Facebook and placed him just above me on his top friends. >_>
Mr Y sent me a very sincere apology text, and we kind of got back on neutral ground, but now I'm not sure what's going on with Mr X, and if there could be anything more with him now. I do really like him, and to be honest he's probably the only one of the people at the LGBT society I fancy. The rest I wouldn't consider my type; most of them are all camp and/ or slutty (perhaps people would consider Mr X slutty too, but I don't know). *sigh*

Jealousy and cruelty

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