Girlfriend's job and past

I am going out with an amazing girl who I love to pieces, and who feels the same way about me. She works part-time in a very nice bar / restaurant in a really expensive part of town. As a result it's always full of high-flying, loaded business men who regularly spend hundreds each evening.

Without wishing to boast, my girlfriend is really beautiful and as a result she gets a lot of attention from the clients. This doesn't usually bother me, because I really do trust her deeply. From time to time though, she comes home and tells me about all the guys she meets, shows me all the phone numbers she's been given and tells me about all the propositions she gets, such as being invited to hotel rooms, offers of trips abroad etc etc.

I am not a jealous or insecure person by nature, and I always do my best to sound enthusiastic about all the storied she tells me... but sometimes it's really hard for me to accept it all. She says that she is not interested in guys who just want to buy her things and treat her like an object, she says she has something much more special with me and I really do believe her when she says it. But at the same time, which girl would be able to resist if a really attractive, rich and successful guy strolled in and pretty much offered her the world? I know that she uses her good-looks and stuff to flirt with clients and make money for the pub, and as far as she's concerned it's 'just business'.

The other thing is that I know she had a fling with her boss when she first started the job, and although this happened a few months before I'd even met her, he makes it clear that he doesn't like me (even though I've never spoken to him) and I know that he still wants her. He is almost the same age, has a lot of money too and is a bit of a player. I try not to think about it all too much, but she works every evening an it's kind of hard, especially as her boss gives her lifts home most evenings.

Should I be worried? Like I said, I really do trust her, I hate doubting her and these are probably just irrational fears. Plus I guess it's better she tells me all of these things, rather than keeping them secret. It's not something I particularly want to talk her about it because I don't want to push her away or seem suffocating. I'd appreciate your thoughts :smile:

Reply 1

The Bishman

She's not a hooker who can be bought.

These guys obviously have nothing on you otherwise she wouldn't be comming home and joking about it to you.

She sounds like she trusts you a lot and you should be thankful, not worried.

Reply 2

username47781

I would be very thankful you have a girlfriend like her, as the above poster says she's with you because she wants you.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Rock Fan

I would be very thankful you have a girlfriend like her, as the above poster says she's with you because she wants you.

I really am, honestly. Not a day goes past where I don't tell her how lucky I am. But I challenge any guy not to feel just a tiny bit ambivalent in this situation. You're both completely right though :cool:

Reply 4

*Katie*

Anonymous

But I challenge any guy not to feel just a tiny bit ambivalent in this situation.

You're completely right. And it's good for you to get your feeling about this out in the open. I'm sure you'll both be fine. :smile:

Reply 5

Dionysus

There's nothing wrong with her getting offers and phone numbers if she's not taking the up on those offers.

Reply 6

GEEKPLEASE

ignorance is bliss in my opinion, why does she tell you about all of these men anyway?
it sounds like she almost enjoys your jealousy as it shows you care.

have you let on to her you feel like this?

Reply 7

silverbolt

*Katie*

You're completely right. And it's good for you to get your feeling about this out in the open. I'm sure you'll both be fine. :smile:

*nods

ok a few things OP

1. the fact that shes telling you about these guys and showing you these phone numbers and laughing about it is a good thing.
2. Im guessing you dont make as much money as these guys and so your feeling a little inferior thats natural - its a guy ego thing
3. O course she uses her looks - all women (and men do) being good looking helps you out and she'd be daft not to. Theres a huge difference between a flirt and spreading your legs.
4. If she knows anything about these blokes she knows that as soon as they have slept with her they will probably get shot her.
5.The fact that her boss doesnt like you is also a good thing, it means he cant get her whilst her doing her all night which is why he cant stand you.
6. Youve got a good looking girl with integrity, yes many women are driven by superficial material goods and i know more than one woman who would dump her boyfriend in a heartbeat for a rich guy but not all are like that and you have one of the good ones.

So chill relax and enjoy her and your time together

Reply 8

Jordan1990

If hearing about it bothers you just ask her not to tell you in future. Assure her you trust her but you just don't like hearing about men drooling over her.

Reply 9

Andy08

Jordan1990

If hearing about it bothers you just ask her not to tell you in future. Assure her you trust her but you just don't like hearing about men drooling over her.

Reply 10

Lauren-silk

Ignorance is bliss, but now that you know that she is getting these propositions and numbers etc it would be harder for you not to hear everything because it would then lead to suspicion and thats not a good thing to have in a relationship.

Reply 11

Anonymous #2

holy **** dude, you are my idol; i'm not a jealous person but being in your relationship would drive me insane.

she gets lifts from her ex & gloats to you about getting chat up by people in a better financial situation than yourself...... seriously does she know how much of a bitch she is?

no offence dude but you are in a **** situation, imagine the reverse; where you come home every day showing your girlfriend all the numbers and offers for going to hotel rooms you got that night, while your ex fling and boss takes you home... seriously man WTF lol.