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Flirting/Hitting on
Hey everyone,
I am starting to get really insecure with my inability to seem to get the ball really rolling with girls. I am in my first year but this problem has been with me for a while. I can converse with good male friends for hours, yet when I talk to girls I close up. For whatever reason I just dont know what to talk about. I spend most of the conversation with guys talking about beer, comedy movies and Ice Hockey.
When I have the chances to talk to a girl I really simply have no idea what I am going to talk about. Even when I just talk about well, whatever, it seems boring more the both of us, and I dont really get any help. Even after that what is a subtle way to hit on a chick. I am not the kind of guy that just slaps girls asses, or would simply walk up to them and ak if they want to make out.
So what are some good things to move onto? I mean real examples, for both flirting and then taking it alittle farther. I am getting really ancy here and just need some relief.
Thanks alot for helping me out here!
Too all my British friends, Lewis will get it next year!
I am starting to get really insecure with my inability to seem to get the ball really rolling with girls. I am in my first year but this problem has been with me for a while. I can converse with good male friends for hours, yet when I talk to girls I close up. For whatever reason I just dont know what to talk about. I spend most of the conversation with guys talking about beer, comedy movies and Ice Hockey.
When I have the chances to talk to a girl I really simply have no idea what I am going to talk about. Even when I just talk about well, whatever, it seems boring more the both of us, and I dont really get any help. Even after that what is a subtle way to hit on a chick. I am not the kind of guy that just slaps girls asses, or would simply walk up to them and ak if they want to make out.
So what are some good things to move onto? I mean real examples, for both flirting and then taking it alittle farther. I am getting really ancy here and just need some relief.
Thanks alot for helping me out here!
Too all my British friends, Lewis will get it next year!
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
Probably the most important advice regarding talking to the opposite sex:
Be yourself and don't put so much pressure on the conversation.
Girls are human too
Be yourself and don't put so much pressure on the conversation.
Girls are human too
Reply 2
maybe you're a bender
Reply 3
sorry....more constructive advice: maybe try being their friend instead of looking for some all the time. make friends, feel comfortable with them, meet their mates and try it on with them
Reply 5
TOD100
sorry....more constructive advice: maybe try being their friend instead of looking for some all the time. make friends, feel comfortable with them, meet their mates and try it on with them
yea!
its nice to ask things about her, get in some open ended questions where she cant answer with a yes or no
From then on you can develop conversations! Just do the guy thing you described but with her interests in mind! If say you ask what her favourite movie is, and you dont like it, then either switch topic or ask about it.
The only difference (im bi and have dated both genders heh) in communication that i've noticed is that with girls you have to take her interests in mind. With a guy you could talk crap for hours
Why not just start with asking her a bit about herself and her interests you may find that you have a lot in common with her. Just let the conversation progress as it normally would there is no reason to force it. There will be some girls that you click with and some that you don't so don't be disheartend if you just don't click with someone pick yourself up and try again.
Girls are people aswell there is no reason why it would be any harder to find something to talk about
Girls are people aswell there is no reason why it would be any harder to find something to talk about
Reply 7
randomgirl
Girls are human too
Girls are human too
^great piece of advice right there...don't put them on a pedestal, as something to be feared and treated with deference...relax be yourself, and you'll soon find out whether she likes you or not
Lol, that post reminded me of the 40 year old virgin."Youre putting the pussy on a pedestal!"
Just relax and ask her about herself. Ask her who the most famous person she's ever met is. This question is guaranteed to generate an interesting response from everyone but the thickest air-head
Just relax and ask her about herself. Ask her who the most famous person she's ever met is. This question is guaranteed to generate an interesting response from everyone but the thickest air-head
Reply 9
One thing to remember, girls love talking about themselve.
Reply 11
geetar
Infectious Diseases. That's always a good one.
Nice.
Well I'd start by asking the usual "I don't know you but want to questions". You know "What course you on/what uni/where do you live blah blah blah.
Then if she's interested remotely she'll keep the conversation flowing and you'll relax.
For the second bit, the very fact that you approached them (assuming this is a club or whatever) says "I fancy you". Then the other subtle ones are plenty of eye contact, compliments (about hair, clothes, general appearance). Maybe a little "accidental" contact, putting your arm on the table against hers, maybe get nice and close if dancing in a club.
Lol if you're nervous a few drinks puts paid to that pretty quick! (Although I have a tendency then to end up flirting with girls I find totally unattractive once I'm totally sober...
)Reply 12
dumbdunc
(Although I have a tendency then to end up flirting with girls I find totally unattractive once I'm totally sober... )
):dito:
Reply 14
dobbs
lol this is because girls usually listen to what a guy has to say and so will get bored if it's crap conversation. Whilst a guy isn't listening, they're just looking around the chest area
lmao at that ^^
whats wrong with ice hockey?? its probably my favourite sport. and rugby's good too even tho i dont get when people are offside or whatever.
id recommend finding out what she likes cos as someone said earlier, gals like talking about themselves. its nice to hear stuff about the guy too as long as its not really boring lol
Reply 15
dobbs
lol this is because girls usually listen to what a guy has to say and so will get bored if it's crap conversation. Whilst a guy isn't listening, they're just looking around the chest area
true,
mind you thats true for some guys with me
Reply 17
Thanks for the ideas to all who helped.
But I just cant help but thinking it would be weird walking up to a random girl and saying "What is your favorite movie"? It would certainly be a good thing to keep the ball rolling say, on a date, however I guess now what I really need are good things that will start the conversation. I really appreciate the tips. I think one of my big problems is when I drink I usually go pretty hard, like 8-12 drinks hard and end up just being to drunk to care and just wanting to cause havok.
Thanks again!
But I just cant help but thinking it would be weird walking up to a random girl and saying "What is your favorite movie"? It would certainly be a good thing to keep the ball rolling say, on a date, however I guess now what I really need are good things that will start the conversation. I really appreciate the tips. I think one of my big problems is when I drink I usually go pretty hard, like 8-12 drinks hard and end up just being to drunk to care and just wanting to cause havok.
Thanks again!
Anonymous
Thanks for the ideas to all who helped.
But I just cant help but thinking it would be weird walking up to a random girl and saying "What is your favorite movie"? It would certainly be a good thing to keep the ball rolling say, on a date, however I guess now what I really need are good things that will start the conversation. I really appreciate the tips. I think one of my big problems is when I drink I usually go pretty hard, like 8-12 drinks hard and end up just being to drunk to care and just wanting to cause havok.
Thanks again!
But I just cant help but thinking it would be weird walking up to a random girl and saying "What is your favorite movie"? It would certainly be a good thing to keep the ball rolling say, on a date, however I guess now what I really need are good things that will start the conversation. I really appreciate the tips. I think one of my big problems is when I drink I usually go pretty hard, like 8-12 drinks hard and end up just being to drunk to care and just wanting to cause havok.
Thanks again!
I very nearly got the wrong impression there...
Reply 19
Talk about comic books.
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