jokes thread :) Watch
ok this isnt that good but ere goes
a married couple were driving along a road in a car. the wife spotted a skunk at the side of the road that looked ill and wet from the rain. they pulled up and the wife said should we take it to the vets, the husband said sure so she got out of the car grabbed the skunk and took it to the car. the wife said to the husband ' where should i put it' he said 'sit it between ure legs and we'll take it to the vets' she said 'what about the smell?' he said 'hold its nose'
What has four wheels and flies?
A rubbish truck.
Okay it didn't really improve it, but it made me giggle
A guy walks into the doctors and the doctor says "i have two pieces of bad news, you have alzheimers and you have aids" and the guy says "phew thank **** i dont have aids" hahahhahahaha
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have
dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the
girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would
like to go out and make love for the first time.
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so
he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The
pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy
everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms
he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy
insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather
busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and
meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to
meet my parents, come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the
girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace
and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his
10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend
leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you
were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was