The Student Room Group

I feel miserable

Right, this will probably seem like one big whine, and I'm sure most people have far bigger problems than I do, but nevertheless.

I'm in year 10, and I keep going up and down, sometimes I feel really motivated and confidant with the work, then I come back down and don't think I can cope, that I won't do nearly as well as I want to, and that I don't really care, which scares me. At the moment I'm in a down phase, and have been for about a fortnight. I've always aimed high academically, wanting A*s and to go to Oxbridge etc, but recently I've been seriously doubting my ability, and at the moment I even doubt if academic achievement and university and all that is actually worth it. This scares me because I haven't got anything else. The only thing that excited me and kept me going was academic motivation; wanting to go to uni etc, and if that's gone I really don't know what else there is. I used to write a lot as well, poetry and short stories, but I haven't written anything for about 3 months, I keep starting things and then abandoning them after about a page. Writing was always my fallback option, something that wasn't academic. I've got no friends, the only ones I have live miles away from me, and I get to see them once a year if I'm lucky, I keep in touch with them over MSN. I really haven't got anything else in my life apart from school and work.

Everyone's expecting me to do really well, and, as I say, I don't know what to do if I don't do really well.

Anyway, I shall stop moaning now. Any advice?

P.S- please don't de-anon this, I have friends here.

Reply 1

Everyone doubts themselves at times and while I don't want to be dismissive try to put it to one side and not let it effect you too much. I'm in my third year of university and have had such phases. Just be confident with the amount of effort you're putting into your work - the results will come.

Don't worry too much - you're only in year 10 and shouldn't be expected to have massive life achievements thus far. Do try to make more friends though as being around other people can be a big help sometimes.

I hope this is a little reassuring.

Reply 2

Making friends is a must -- you need to get out, as it will take your mind off your academic worries and self-doubt. I'm in my second year of university and I still suffer from spells of insecurity and self-doubt at times; when I find myself feeling like a stupid, incompetent failure and wanting to give up, I do extra work or find time to do extra reading for my course. It really helps.
All writers, even the greatest geniuses, suffer from writer's block now and again -- it's not just you. It helps to write every day. Some of your pieces may never get off the ground; others you might well be able to take further.

Reply 3

You can do well, and you know you can. Everyone has periods of doubt, it's perfectly normal.

If its pressure from family and/or friends like you hinted, try and ignore that get your own desire to do well back. I've had experience of a lot of what you're saying and when you remind yourself that it is because of yourself and only yourself that you want to do well, it might help things a bit.

As Francophobia said, try and make friends if you can - it really will help. I know that it can be hard, and it has been at times for me, but give it a shot - you might be surprised at the results and it may help how you're feeling.

Good luck. I hope the advice was OK, I haven't really done this sort of thing before.

Reply 4

I didnt know what I wanted to do when I finished school until halfway through year 12. You're only in year 10. You've only just started your GCSE's and are already panicking about what grades you'll get. I know its hard not to, but dont worry!

I've had quite a time of it with school, I missed out on practically all of years 7, 8 and 9, so it was a big struggle for me in year 10, as I was not used to the amount of work expected of me. I had many ups and downs, and to be honest, I still do and I'm almost 18. I'm always doubting my ability and work, I'm always thinking 'I cant do this, its impossible, I wanna give up, I dont care anymore'. But I can do it, its just one of them things. Everyone doubts themselves at one point or another, you just need to take yourself away from your work and do something else, even just for half an hour or so. Go for a walk, go to the shop, read a magazine, just something that isnt work.

As for not having any friends, it was year 10/11 for me that I found the friends I have now. It's so different, because you're doing the subjects you want to do, with people who also want to do them, so at least you have something in common. Gradually I'm sure you will make friends.

I hope this helps, not sure if it will or not, but I will check back.

Reply 5

Thanks it does help. The trouble with making friends is that there's about 200 people in my school, and I know them all; there's about 8 people in all my options classes.

I know it's writer's block, it just gets me down because it's been going on so long, and it doesn't seem like I'll ever come out of it.

I will try and stop worrying about what will happen in 4 years, it's just difficult, because, as I say, I have nothing else to think about. All the more reason to make some friends I suppose.

Thanks for replying :smile: