What do I do?

Please don't de-anon, people who both I & my girlfriend know use this forum.

Right, my girlfriend of 6 months just texted me and asked me if I really loved her, I replied saying that I thought that I did and I knew that if I didn't that this is the closest thing to loving somebody I've ever been, I've never felt this way about anybody before.
She replied saying that she really liked me but thinks she rushed into saying that she loved me, which I was fine with, I want her to say it when she means it. But she also said that she was worried that by saying that I loved her it would be harder for me if anything were to happen to us and that she thinks that she might have feelings for a close friend of ours (she wouldn't tell me who)
I've asked her what she wanted to do and she said she didn't know, but that she didn't want to break up.

I'm really upset and worried, I really don't know what to say or do now. I won't see her until monday now because she's in Wales and I just don't know what to say when I see her.

What do I do?

Thanks in advance

Reply 1

kaylee:)

I think thats brilliant that she doesnt want to split up. And she obviously wants to be sure she likes you as oppose to get your hopes up. Thats gotta be good eh?

Besides how old are you?

I bet she wont be the last girl youll ever be with!

K xx

Reply 2

Kittennffc

15

When you see her, just give her a big hug. It doesn't have to be awkward or anything, you are going out after all. Just sit down and have a bit heart to heart with her about both of your feelings.

If she did decide to end it, surely that'd be better in the long run than stringing you along and hurting you even more. I think she's been really brave in telling you this; think how mixed up she might be feeling. You might want to tell her you appreciate her honesty, even if it is making you upset?

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Thanks, thats really cheered me up :smile:

I'm 18 by the way, and yeah, I agree with what you say about her not being the last girl I'll ever be with, I just don't want it to end any time soon.

Can I just ask, should I try to ignore the other guy thing or ask her about it?

Reply 4

Bismarck

13

It seems rather cruel to ask someone if they love you right before you tell them that you have feelings for someone else...

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Kittennffc: I have told her I appreciate her telling me, and I do, it means a lot to me

Reply 6

mollymustard

14

Oooh that is a hard one.

On one hand shes given you lots of complements; she can trust you enough to tell you and she thinks she wants to be with you.

But then shes also being quite confusing and acting very uncertain, and almost seems to prepare you for a big let down.

I spose the only thing you can really do is to speak to her face to face and talk about things abit more. Its not fair for her to be so indecisive, but I guess things always work themselves out in the end.

Reply 7

h82think

14

Sounds to me that the only reason she told you that she loved you was to ensure she was not wasting her time. Good thing you told her you loved her, otherwise I'm sure she would have gone off with that other guy.

My advice is: if you really like her, fight for her!

Reply 8

randdom

20

I think that you need to sit down and talk to her. If she is having feelings for someone else this is something that needs to be addressed.

Reply 9

TKnightrider

Bismarck

It seems rather cruel to ask someone if they love you right before you tell them that you have feelings for someone else...

Quite, it sees abit shocking :s

Reply 10

Unregistered

6 months and she already has feelings for other people? 6 months and not sure if you love each other?

Ur, move on... what a pointless relationship.

Reply 11

TKnightrider

Thats harsh saying it was pointless..

Reply 12

MaryKay

8

She sounds a bit mixed up, perhaps she wanted to have an exact definition of how you feel about her, love and being in love is mega :eek:

in my opinion, because you are investing such a huge amount of trust and feeling in another person.

So, in doing that you could be laying yourself open to being hurt badly, talk to her, sometimes people claim that others like them etc to provoke a reaction from the existing bf/gf.

Reply 13

Somewhat Damaged

Timeslikethese

6 months and she already has feelings for other people? 6 months and not sure if you love each other?

Ur, move on... what a pointless relationship.

Lol, I know someone who's been with someone for over a year, steady. And he still won't say he loves his girlfriend.

YOU might have a completely different beliefe on the word love. But some people can genuinly think you can be with someone 20 years and only just begin to love them.

Pft.

Don't you dare say someone's relationship is pointless.
You don't know anything about it.
You don't have to love someone to be in a relationship with a meaning.

eurg.

Reply 14

TKnightrider

I couldnt agree more. It was wrong of times like these to even say it was pointless. Its just rude and unhelpful

Reply 15

Notepadmed

Anonymous

Please don't de-anon, people who both I & my girlfriend know use this forum.

Right, my girlfriend of 6 months just texted me and asked me if I really loved her, I replied saying that I thought that I did and I knew that if I didn't that this is the closest thing to loving somebody I've ever been, I've never felt this way about anybody before.
She replied saying that she really liked me but thinks she rushed into saying that she loved me, which I was fine with, I want her to say it when she means it. But she also said that she was worried that by saying that I loved her it would be harder for me if anything were to happen to us and that she thinks that she might have feelings for a close friend of ours (she wouldn't tell me who)
I've asked her what she wanted to do and she said she didn't know, but that she didn't want to break up.

I'm really upset and worried, I really don't know what to say or do now. I won't see her until monday now because she's in Wales and I just don't know what to say when I see her.

What do I do?

Thanks in advance

hmm think you both need to seat together and habe a serouse convo withearth hope ypu can sort out this nightmare AOP sensibly kind hopes to yout!!

Reply 16

Unregistered

Somewhat Damaged

Lol, I know someone who's been with someone for over a year, steady. And he still won't say he loves his girlfriend.

YOU might have a completely different beliefe on the word love. But some people can genuinly think you can be with someone 20 years and only just begin to love them.

Pft.

Don't you dare say someone's relationship is pointless.
You don't know anything about it.
You don't have to love someone to be in a relationship with a meaning.

eurg.

LOL! Oh noes, i'm sarrrrrryyyyy.

If you're fancying other people after only 6 months, it's a bit grim. If after 6 months you aren't completely floored by the person, it's really not worth chasing.

Stop being such an idealistic ****, 20 years my foot...

Reply 17

kookoo_koochoo

1

Timeslikethese

If you're fancying other people after only 6 months, it's a bit grim. If after 6 months you aren't completely floored by the person, it's really not worth chasing.

Yeah my boyfriend said that if he didn't know he loved me within the first few months he'd not have pursued it, which I thought was a little harsh lol, and I'd have waited to see how it developed but I suppose it depends on the person. You should just talk to her, and ask her about these feelings for this other person because that sounds like an issue that needs to be sorted now rather than left for longer as it might crop up later on and will be worse for you both to deal with.

Reply 18

TKnightrider

Timeslikethese

LOL! Oh noes, i'm sarrrrrryyyyy.

If you're fancying other people after only 6 months, it's a bit grim. If after 6 months you aren't completely floored by the person, it's really not worth chasing.

Stop being such an idealistic ****, 20 years my foot...

Well would you know about love? I doubt it

Reply 19

qubog

12

Uh-oh. I feel like theres a "maybe we should take a break" coming on :s-smilie:

What do I do?

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