Should we still go out??????

Hey everyone,

Right, me and my boyfriend were going out for just over a year and for the first 6 months or whatever everything was fine and we hardly ever argued atall. We'd been friends for years before so we really got on well anyway. So after these 6 months we really loved each other a lot and we were very close. But, something weird happened after 6 months, we just started arguing over petty things but we still stayed together to try and work stuff out. It was particularly hard because it was a long distance relationship and we were hours from each other so we couldn't really meet up to talk, plus he is in his 3rd year at uni so is busy and can't really text/call to talk about it either. Anyway, it's gotten so bad lately that he decided to end it as he doesn't want the commitment and the arguments! To try and get over us I've not been in communication with him for a few days (we broke up weeks ago but we tried to be just friends but it doesn't really work) but he keeps texting me and e-mailing me saying how one part of him wants to move on and the other wants to be with me and work it out. We obviously really love each other a lot still but I don't know if it can work with the distance and everything?

Sorry for the long post, just wanted to know your opinion on the matter, thanks!!

Reply 1

Saffie

11

If it's just a hassle, keep away. Why prolong the break up.

Reply 2

username47781

20

Is this the boyfriend who didn't want you to meet his parents? I can't help but feel he was mucking you around a little with the whole thing. He seems to be given you mixed signals as well. So maybe you both need to talk next time and decide what you both really want but it does sound like he is messing you around a bit.

Reply 3

Kimbolina

OP

Rock Fan

Is this the boyfriend who didn't want you to meet his parents? I can't help but feel he was mucking you around a little with the whole thing. He seems to be given you mixed signals as well. So maybe you both need to talk next time and decide what you both really want but it does sound like he is messing you around a bit.

Lol wow you have a good memory :eek:

thanks for the advice though!

Reply 4

pumpkin7

13

how old are you, twelve? man. you tried being friends for a week? lol. obviously after a year of being together and then ending it, you aren't going to be able to switch from being boyfriend and girlfriend to being just friends. hell, i broke up with my ex over a year ago, and i still wouldn't be able to be friends with him now.
you have to give it a lot of time.
and don't let him mess you around. there are plenty more fish in the sea, who live closer to home!

Reply 5

Kimbolina

OP

pumpkin7

how old are you, twelve? man. you tried being friends for a week? lol. obviously after a year of being together and then ending it, you aren't going to be able to switch from being boyfriend and girlfriend to being just friends. hell, i broke up with my ex over a year ago, and i still wouldn't be able to be friends with him now.
you have to give it a lot of time.
and don't let him mess you around. there are plenty more fish in the sea, who live closer to home!

I'm 18 and I'm a girl not a man, thanks :biggrin:

Reply 6

qubog

12

Just give it a few weeks and see how you feel then. It's a bit soon to be making that kind of decision, especially as he is the one who ended it.

Reply 7

pumpkin7

13

i didn't mean you were a man, i was saying it like 'maaaaaaaaan, that's **** dawg!'...

ppth ok but listen to the rest of my advice.

Reply 8

Kimbolina

OP

pumpkin7

i didn't mean you were a man, i was saying it like 'maaaaaaaaan, that's **** dawg!'...

ppth ok but listen to the rest of my advice.

Lol yeah I know I was being sort of sarcastic! I said ''a few weeks'' not one, sorry if I gave the wrong impression but it's been since August!

Reply 9

Dream1

If he really loves you he would always find the time to meet you and spend time with you regardless of where you are, this guy is not clear whether he really wants you, so he is nothing special. Be careful you dont hurt your own feelings by loving this guy.

Reply 10

pumpkin7

13

oh ok. it's late and i'm phished.

anyway, yeah. forget him, move on. he's wasting your time. PLENTY MORE SPROGLETS IN THE SEA.

Reply 11

Phantom Phoenix

13

The simple answer to "should we be going out" should always, always be "not if you don't want to". If you're having serious doubts about having an LDR with this guy, why not pack it in for a few weeks and wait for Xmas. Then you can spend some time talking without his work distracting him and find out what's going to be happening and where you stand, get some perspective, see if you really want to get back together or not.

Just a suggestion, but if you're far apart and fighting then you can't sort of hug and make up the way you could if you were together, which makes it hard...plus my gut feeling is that, if you're pissing each other off from long distances, you probably should seriously reconsider your relationship.

Think carefully, but don't be afraid to end it if you're not happy. Too many people get trapped by "we've been together a year, we can't throw that away" and just put up with circumstances they wouldn't have tolerated one month into a relationship. You have the right to be as happy as possible with your boyfriend, and if he's not making you happy you have the right to reconsider your attachment.

Reply 12

dumbdunc

pumpkin7

PLENTY MORE SPROGLETS IN THE SEA.

Isn't a sproglet a baby...?

I didn't get the impression she was looking for one of those :p:

Should we still go out??????

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