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When your ex is more successful than you

Have you ever been in a situation where you find out that an ex is doing really well? In the movies this is usually where the other person hits 'rock bottom' and works their way up but it would be interested how people react to this news in real life.

Would it spur you on/motivate you? Or would it make you feel useless/depressed? Or would you not care less?

Reply 1

username3108158

Original post by Anonymous

It would make me more depressed than anything, I think.

Reply 2

Vicky628

I like to think I'd feel happy for them?

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

It would motivate me. My ex is an *******, I would have to outdo him!

Reply 4

Charles III

Being completely honest, I really wouldn't care either way. They're nothing to do with me, why would I care? :laugh:

Reply 5

Flexchm

Original post by Anonymous

I doesn't really bother me how everyone is doing. Even if that person is someone I really don't like. Because as time spins there are up and downs for everyone. The good ones will have more ups than downs compared to those evil ones. Only time can confirm this

Reply 6

niamhdoesmaths

I don't see how I'd have any way of finding out, I don't keep up with them because they're not in my life for a reason. If somehow I did, it wouldn't phase me whatsoever :dontknow:

Reply 7

username1726117

I'm more concerned about my own life than that of an ex; they're no longer in my life for a (very good) reason.

That said, from what little I know of all of them;

- One continues to blame me / others for her mental health problems.
- One is a mentally ill drama queen who's lost a ton of friends in the preceding months and now is making false accusations about other men.
- One is studying aboard. I wouldn't say it's "more successful", but it's an experience and honestly I'm happy she's (presumably) enjoying herself.
- One got into a relationship soon after me. Honestly, happy for her, even if she's an emotionally immature, lying *****.

So, not really in a situation to say otherwise.

And even if all of them suddenly became rich and famous, I wouldn't care. It's their lives. I have my own road to follow and I will continue to focus on myself. I'm not vindictive, nor do I wish misfortune on others.

Reply 8

Tootles

Ha. My first two girlfriends are definitely not more successful than me.

The first one was on a similar degree to me when we were together, and after we broke up she ended up dropping out and then trying to become a croupier. By all accounts, she doesn't know what she's doing there either; people have told me she's bad at her job, doesn't turn up on time, and is rude to customers and staff.

The second one has been working a pretty-much dead-end job at a branch of B&M for four years, and isn't likely to go anywhere fast.

The third one, however - the most recent - has actual aspirations and goals, and is prepared to work for them. We stayed friends after parting ways, and I've been encouraging her to do the things she's wanting to do. As friends, I still know she can make me proud of her.

Reply 9

username944192

I would either not care or it would motivate me. Probably not care though. Someone told me this phrase recently and I really like it - 'too busy watering my own grass to notice if yours is greener' try to live by that now.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 10

27121991

Haha good question...

My exes.. consist of one!
- He's currently approaching 30 and a lifeguard/ gym instructor and living at home with his parents.

Me..
- Just sitting my final exams for Dentistry. Secured my first job as a dentist in September. And fought for GB.

I'd like to say I'm more successful.. but in all honesty. I was willing to give him everything but he turned out to be a serial cheater for the last 10 months of a four year relationship

In terms of people I've dated
- I'm genuinely glad for their successes

Reply 11

asif007

I'd say I'm already a bit more successful than my exes purely on the career path I've chosen in which (hopefully) I will be earning well and travelling a lot. I aim to move up in society and keep good company if I continue meeting famous people through my film work. My exes might have hit milestones much earlier than I have (degree, job, relationships etc) but I like to think I will be the one who has the last laugh. Becoming more successful to make all my exes and all the girls who rejected me (for trivial reasons) jealous is my main motivation for moving forward. I hope one day they will all regret treating me like **** but it will be too late for them to come crawling back. I'll be ploughing my way through more chicks than I can count. :tongue:

Reply 12

username1842595

Im more sucessful than both my ex's at the moment and thats the way its always gonna be :smile:

Reply 13

yudothis

She is not, so **** yea.

Reply 14

username1863805

I know for a fact that two of my exes are WAY more successful than I'll ever be, probably. But to be honest, it's never bothered me. I really cared for them, probably always will, so I want them to be happy and successful in life. It would probably tear me up if their lives were going downhill or if they were hurting.

But I did have a *****y reunion a few years back with one of them and he was an absolute d**k about it. He kept trying to show me up and boast. I could tell he was trying to make me feel small and inferior. But I have a different value system, so that s**t just won't work on me. In the end I actually felt bad for him that I still mattered so much that he felt the need to boast to me. He's moved up in the world but become even more insecure than he used to be. Like a little boy. Funny that. I thought whatever bond we'd had would stay strong enough that he wouldn't get petty on me. But it did make me extremely glad to be with my current boyfriend. Despite his money and success, he's never made me feel that way. And I don't have to ego-soothe like I did with my ex.

Reply 15

Crapzilla

I have one ex only. Married the secone one I dated.Wonderful woman. Never came to terms with us ending it. She started dating a friend who was definitely better at career than I was then.I did better for myself and tried to forget her. Discovered 3 years later she dumped him and got married within 6 months and moved away.I always felt I was doing better than her until I recently discovered that subsequent to marriage ahe went on to study at reputed places and is absolutely killing it at her career. Definitely more than me. Its bitter-sweet now. I am proud of having been close to her but sometimes wonder how we would have managed ourselves now with success. Another realization is that money is definitely not a benchmark of success.I do wish her well professionally

Reply 16

Stovepipe

Movies aren't real and don't compare yourself with other people.
Life has ups and downs people go through different **** at different stages.
Life is hard, Deal with it.
Why are you still thinking about your exs life?
Get up and get your **** together