Maths Jokes.

It's nearing Christmas, which is when I get the most hyper, so I'd like to have a couple of hilarious (preferably rude :biggrin:

) Maths jokes in my arsenal to "brighten up" my lessons.

If you tell me yours, I'll tell you my 69 one. :redface:

Oh, and the jokes can involve anything related to Maths, though I may ask you to explain it to me. :p:

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Reply 1

Swayum

What did the mathematician say after Christmas dinner? $\sqrt{\frac{-1}{64}}$

Hint

Why did the mathematical tree fall over? Because it had no real roots.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9.

Reply 2

Number6

Would you like to do some maths?
OK
Let's go to your room, add the bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and multiply :biggrin:

And yes, I have posted that before. I have no life, I know.

Reply 3

ahmed.pilot

I like those DeathAwaitsU, especially the first one! Though it doesn't satisfy the OP's suggested criteria of being rude!

Reply 4

Glutamic Acid

My signature :smile:

Reply 5

alan989

DeathAwaitsU

What did the mathematician say after Christmas dinner? $\sqrt{\frac{-1}{64}}$

its depressing, i got that without the hint. i think someone needs to shoot me.

Reply 6

Pony Jack

Who ate all the 3.1415's :p:

Reply 7

Candescence

$\displaystyle\int^{13}_{10} 2x \, \mathrm{d}x$ ?

Reply 8

Epitomessence

Candescence

$\displaystyle\int^{13}_{10} 2x \, \mathrm{d}x$ ?

No, mine was:

What's the square root of 69? :cool:

Reply 9

Riquelminho

DeathAwaitsU

What did the mathematician say after Christmas dinner? $\sqrt{\frac{-1}{64}}$

I dont get it, even after reading the hint :redface:

What's it meant to say lol?

Maybe its just a further mathematicians thing :confused:

Reply 10

Aksan

The first one that comes to mind is one that my maths teacher told me, although this is probably a butchered version of it:

There are two mathematicians in a restaurant and they are in dispute over the mathematical abilities of "commoners". The first of them believes that the average person wouldn't even be able to do the most trivial of integrals while the second has some "faith" in the commoner.

The first one goes off to the toilet and while he is gone, the second calls over a waitress. He tells her in a short time, he will call her over and ask her a question. All she has to do is answer 1/3x^3. So she goes off and mumbles "one third x cubed" to herself.

The first one then returns and the second mathematician offers to make a bet with him about their recent argument. So he calls the waitress back and asks her "What's the integral of x^2?"

She answers "1/3x^3" much to the amazement of the first mathematician. But as she walks away she mumbles, "...plus c."

:p: