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My sis doesn't like my lifestyle
My sister is very religious. She is a muslim.
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
You need to look at how strong your faith is IMO. I cant say i can relate exactly because i have no faith and never have done, but i have had to make lifestyle choices and they're always hard.
If a party animal is what you are and makes you happy then thats what you should be. Faith is different for everyone, just because youve had a religious upbringing you dont have to follow it strictly if thats not you. you're old enough to make decisions and your sister should understand that.
If a party animal is what you are and makes you happy then thats what you should be. Faith is different for everyone, just because youve had a religious upbringing you dont have to follow it strictly if thats not you. you're old enough to make decisions and your sister should understand that.
Reply 2
Tell her to keep her nose out of your business. As long as you're sensible and enjoy yourself, that's all that matters.
In other words:
PPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRTTTTTAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY
In other words:
PPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRTTTTTAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY
Reply 3
Anonymous
My sister is very religious. She is a muslim.
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Reply 4
Anonymous
My sister is very religious. She is a muslim.
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
read Nietzsche
Reply 6
Compromise? Work hard and play hard.
Tell your sister that it is your business and that you are happier now. Surely she'd rather have a happy brother than a sad and depressed one?
Tell your sister that it is your business and that you are happier now. Surely she'd rather have a happy brother than a sad and depressed one?
Anonymous
My sister is very religious. She is a muslim.
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Anyway, this year at university I have turned into a party animal...I am talking to a lot of girls, going on dates, drinking - basically quite wild. The last two years of my academical career I was very geeky and nerdy. Pretty studious, and as a result I became depressed. I am now living my life to the max and really having a good time socializing. I have just let go of my insecurities and dont care what anyone thinks.
She hates it, because I am turning into a 'lad' and basically what I am doing is going against my faith. Deep down inside I can see where she is coming from, but I just look back at my last two years and just dont want to revert back to that old lifestyle. I used to complain why I got very little opportunities, I was also very uptight and didn't feel wanted. Now its the reverse (only now I am quite distracted academically).
I have a moralistic dilemma, don't really know how to deal with it. I feel as though if I hold onto my religious morals, no girl will appreciate it, they will see me as a guy that is too timid, boring - and that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Are you enjoying this lifestyle? Or are you just doing it because you feel you have to in order to fit in? If it's the latter - don't bother, be yourself and find someone who likes you for you. If it's the former, then enjoy it. You'll only be at University once; you can't let your family dictate your life.
Reply 9
do all this stuff. then ask your religion for forgiveness after!
Reply 10
Anonymous
that the only way for me to get girls is by acting the way I am now i.e. conforming and being fun in the manner I have been.
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
Anyone else have the same dilemma?
A muslim man is not supposed to get girls ! I have seen plenty of muslim guys, they are clever, sensible, not so wild but have a happy life. Indeed, all the girls admire them. They are charming because of the way they are. I also agree with whoever said you are going thorugh all this just to fit in and be cool. You dnt have to drink or goo crazy, to bring attention to yourself. there are other better ways to do that.
You are seriously breaking islamic rules. So, question yourself whether u r suited as a muslim or whether you would be carrying on like the way you are ! Atm, you may be happy but in far future, you will see true happiness doesnt lie in those kind of lifestyle .
I have sort of the complete opposite.
My sister is the party animal, and I am the serious one. I have a serious relationship with my bf and never go out clubbing, only meeting friends for dinner. She is always telling me I am wasting my life and an embarrassment. I just generally ignore her, as it is my life and not hers!
As for your religious status, I have always believed religion is meant to better your spiritual life, and if religion is in the way of making you less depressed, then maybe it is about time you stopped working for religion and make the religion work around you!
My sister is the party animal, and I am the serious one. I have a serious relationship with my bf and never go out clubbing, only meeting friends for dinner. She is always telling me I am wasting my life and an embarrassment. I just generally ignore her, as it is my life and not hers!
As for your religious status, I have always believed religion is meant to better your spiritual life, and if religion is in the way of making you less depressed, then maybe it is about time you stopped working for religion and make the religion work around you!
Reply 12
Just keep partying and enjoying yourself! What else is there to university life?
Reply 13
i agree with the people above, u shouldn't be living any lfestyle where u are conforming to who other people think you should be, completely devout muslim or the exact opposite. people will appreciate you for who you are. you dn't need to drink, act completely out of control to have fun and attract attention.
my bf is muslim. he doesn't drink, but he still socialises, but he also dates. so maybe not the best example of islam, but he seems content with it and so are his family.
my bf is muslim. he doesn't drink, but he still socialises, but he also dates. so maybe not the best example of islam, but he seems content with it and so are his family.
Reply 14
Carry on doing what your doing.
You said yourself your old lifestyle was making you deppressed, & now your happy!Don't go back to your old ways just to please others, unless it's what you want
You said yourself your old lifestyle was making you deppressed, & now your happy!Don't go back to your old ways just to please others, unless it's what you want
If your new lifestyle makes you happy, and you no longer feel depressed, then by no means give it up and revert to a life that did. that would do you no good.
Does your sister live with you? If you are at uni and are living there, and she lives elsewhere you could perhaps not tell her the details of your drinking and dating and other things she disproves of. I'm not saying lie, but theres no need to give her the full details. It sounds like she cares about you, so you could spend time with her where you behave in a way she feels appropriate and do activities which you both enjoy. that way she may realise that you are still the brother she has always known
Does your sister live with you? If you are at uni and are living there, and she lives elsewhere you could perhaps not tell her the details of your drinking and dating and other things she disproves of. I'm not saying lie, but theres no need to give her the full details. It sounds like she cares about you, so you could spend time with her where you behave in a way she feels appropriate and do activities which you both enjoy. that way she may realise that you are still the brother she has always known
Reply 16
hang on. you're not exactly a Muslim, if you're not following your faith so you may as well take the "label" of being a Muslim off your soul and live like you want to.
no one's guranteed us tomorrow..in the end we're all accountable for our own actions. so how does it matter what your sister wants from you o.0
by the way, having bound to a religion doesn't make one boring or timid. yea religion does build up your personality to some extent but how you carry and present yourself depends on you.
as far as moralistic dilemma is concered, you know what you're doing better than anyone else. if you go around have fun, party, date, drink, gamble...whatever and still feel a burden of morals than obviously someone needs a reality check. its not you.
yea temporarily you do get tempted but it in the end it all depends on how strong your faith is. which seemingly is not very strong in your case so yea.... carry on dude.
no one's guranteed us tomorrow..in the end we're all accountable for our own actions. so how does it matter what your sister wants from you o.0
by the way, having bound to a religion doesn't make one boring or timid. yea religion does build up your personality to some extent but how you carry and present yourself depends on you.
as far as moralistic dilemma is concered, you know what you're doing better than anyone else. if you go around have fun, party, date, drink, gamble...whatever and still feel a burden of morals than obviously someone needs a reality check. its not you.
yea temporarily you do get tempted but it in the end it all depends on how strong your faith is. which seemingly is not very strong in your case so yea.... carry on dude.
Reply 17
h82think
My sister is the party animal, and I am the serious one. I have a serious relationship with my bf and never go out clubbing, only meeting friends for dinner. She is always telling me I am wasting my life and an embarrassment. I just generally ignore her, as it is my life and not hers!
My sister is the party animal, and I am the serious one. I have a serious relationship with my bf and never go out clubbing, only meeting friends for dinner. She is always telling me I am wasting my life and an embarrassment. I just generally ignore her, as it is my life and not hers!
Your sister sounds like an idiot.
Reply 19
The above is why I vehemently dislike Islam.
It is your life mate. Go out, do what you want to, and don't listen to the rules of your religion. It is YOUR life, and wouldn't it be a waste of your life if it turned out there is NO afterlife.
It is your life mate. Go out, do what you want to, and don't listen to the rules of your religion. It is YOUR life, and wouldn't it be a waste of your life if it turned out there is NO afterlife.
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