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Why are people so supportive of teenagers who have children? Watch

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    (Original post by Glassapple)
    Realistically they're going to be palming the child off to their parents a lot, who will most likely feel they don't want to do it all over again so soon. There's another mutual friend on Facebook who's 18 and always goes on about what a good mum she is, yet she posts pictures every Friday and Saturday night with her breasts hanging out, drinking in a club. Then she posts statuses about how hard it is to be a mum while hungover the morning after. Obviously her parents are doing an awful lot of the things she should be doing.



    What did you say and what was the reaction?
    If we're basing how good a mother is on her ability to stay sober in a club, then that's probably not the best scenario to use! There are plenty of parents (including mine) that would relish at the opportunity to look after their grandchild, regardless of age.
    Young parents aren't the only ones to be bad parents.
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    Have to agree
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    if its whats happened they can't go back in time now, its better they don't beat themelves up about it and teenagers need support because they are generally mentally more unstable. why support them? the question is why not support/help them?
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    They've done a stupid thing, but are at least to some extent dealing with the consequences. In some cases it's a legitimate accident and they are deciding to keep it. In some cases it's kids not being responsible and dealing with the consequence. Either way, the situation they are now in is a tough one and they're doing at least something.

    Also, there's social etiquette (you can't just call somebody an irresponsible cow on fb), it's an interesting thing and people want to feel part of it, people want mum and dad to like them so they get to coo over a baby, people don't want mum and dad to hate them cos then they can't keep an eye on baby and swoop in if they mess up.

    I personally make sure i'm super nice to people who I think are about to f things up cos then they will be more likely to accept my help and advice later. Once mum is already pregnant there's no use telling them it's dumb- damage is already done. I'd want to make sure mum and dad are comfortable with me so I cam make sure baby is okay and mum and dad do know what they are doing (in the suspicious feeling situations at least).
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    (Original post by _Fergo)
    How is it a privilege? You act as if gay people should be thankful or something.

    It's not like straight people have to have children. It's either a choice or the result of a mistake (including criminal acts).

    Meh.

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    Yeah but there is no risk of accidentally having children, can have a much more care free attitude towards it
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    (Original post by glad-he-ate-her)
    Yeah but there is no risk of accidentally having children, can have a much more care free attitude towards it
    Pretty sure STD are just as worrisome (that also includes straight people obviously) to ensure sufficient precautions.

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    kind of inclined to agree
    i know someone who recently had a baby and i just didn't really understand everyone's reaction to it. Mind you i suppose i'm not a maternal person anyway.
    Obviously people shouldn't be mean to them and abortion isn't for everyone etc but i don't really know whether it should be congratulated in such a way, especially as having had the same pshe lessons etc as her i can safely say we were taught about 100 times about safe sex etc and contraception
    just one of them things i suppose, creds to people who actually look after the child
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    (Original post by Glassapple)
    I've just seen on Facebook that a Facebook friend of a Facebook friend has had a child today, she's 16 and so is the father. There are over 300 likes and comments saying how 'proud' everyone is, with lots of 'congratulations' and 'well done' messages being posted.

    What's happened is some chavvy girl wanted sex and didn't care about the consequences, so slept with a chavvy guy she barely knows. Neither of them wanted this child and neither of them will realistically be any good as parents. Now they're being congratulated like they've actually done some good for the world. It's just wrong, all it does is support their stupidity and sends a message to others that it's celebrated if they choose to do the same thing.
    I saw this thread earlier and wondered 'Who on Earth would post something like that?'. I clicked on it now. Of course it is you :lol: (I am not saying it in a bad way, it is just a very 'you' thing to post about. :rolleyes: )

    I agree with you, though.

    I know a girl who gave birth last year (at the age of 18 after getting pregnant at 17). The father was some 30-something man (or late 20-something? I do not remember and I do not care) who was married to an 80-something British woman in order to be eligible for a Visa. Her entire family was proud of her and saw it as a blessing.

    Meanwhile, I was silently judging her and thinking 'Girl, you do not even wash yourself twice a month, I doubt you will be able to care for a baby without it getting sick' to myself. No offence intended, but that girl and her family had the worst hygiene I had ever seen in my entire life and were completely unfit (both mentally and financially; their family could hardly sustain themselves and this girl was taken into care at one point because her family was abusive) to take care of a baby. I did not think it was possible to be that unhygienic. And the 'only bathing after two weeks or more' thing is just the beginning...
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    (Original post by Glassapple)
    I've just seen on Facebook that a Facebook friend of a Facebook friend has had a child today, she's 16 and so is the father. There are over 300 likes and comments saying how 'proud' everyone is, with lots of 'congratulations' and 'well done' messages being posted.

    What's happened is some chavvy girl wanted sex and didn't care about the consequences, so slept with a chavvy guy she barely knows. Neither of them wanted this child and neither of them will realistically be any good as parents. Now they're being congratulated like they've actually done some good for the world. It's just wrong, all it does is support their stupidity and sends a message to others that it's celebrated if they choose to do the same thing.
    Wholeheartedly agree, though sadly very few people are likely to highlight the issues surrounding the circumstances for fear of being painted out to be the "bad guy".

    Better for Chavvy Girl and Chavvy Boy to discover for themselves the hardships of adulthood / parenting and hope they learn from the experience, than for them to simply lump the children to social services. Either way, the poor kid's got the short end of the stick here; unfortunately chances are high they'll break up and then there will be a dysfunctional "family" to deal with.
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    (Original post by Glassapple)
    I've just seen on Facebook that a Facebook friend of a Facebook friend has had a child today, she's 16 and so is the father. There are over 300 likes and comments saying how 'proud' everyone is, with lots of 'congratulations' and 'well done' messages being posted.

    What's happened is some chavvy girl wanted sex and didn't care about the consequences, so slept with a chavvy guy she barely knows. Neither of them wanted this child and neither of them will realistically be any good as parents. Now they're being congratulated like they've actually done some good for the world. It's just wrong, all it does is support their stupidity and sends a message to others that it's celebrated if they choose to do the same thing.
    Well it is Facebook friends - and people like and whatever on anything on Facebook. If anything people are very critical of people having childeen so young, heck if you tried getting married at even 20, a lot of people will be like "well.. are you sure?".
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    Because... they need support
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    Kids are a blessing. Human life is a gift.
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    As others have said, people generally feel compelled to be nice on Facebook, especially in these situations.
    Two girls who used to be my friends at primary school are now mothers. People on Facebook post really supportive messages to them but in real-life conversations, they say more negative things like "she is too young", "the baby is going to grow up without a dad", "she's thrown away her education/career".

    I personally would rather wait until I am financially independent with a stable career and with a man who I know actually wants children, but everyone has their own perspectives on life.
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    The film Idiocracy is becoming more and more likely to be a reality every day.
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    Well it's a mistake you're immune to
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    Stop judging a young girl and get on with your own life. Considering she's a friend of a friend, chances are you probably don't even know her properly - you can't judge whether someone's a good mother or not just because they go out clubbing. Young people can be really good parents, age doesn't really decide who is and isn't a decent parent.
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    (Original post by slowdive)
    Because they're still children and do not realise how difficult it is to bring up a child until the day it is born. They need support more than anyone, there's no point abandoning the mother who may then put another child into care unnecessarily.

    Young parents don't always get it wrong though: You think, you can have your freedom in your 30's, which everyone says are the best times of your life. Or you can choose to have children in your late 20's early 30's and lose that freedom until you're about 50. It's all about balance, and what your aspirations in life are.
    this^^^^

    Plenty of young parents do a good job and put their own lives on hold to give their kids the best possible life.

    Also, most young parents will have heard several months of 'this is a huge mistake, you're being a moron' while their family try and talk them out of keeping the baby. Once they've delivered it and there is a baby there it's really too late for that stuff. It's best for the child if people band together and offer some support + if mum is happy and not feeling like the world hates her.
 
 
 
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