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Mum wants/forcing me to take the hijab off - help!

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Reply 20
Wear it if you want to wear it, don't if you don't want to.
Original post by Anonymous
But she'd stop talking to me or something lol, and get the rest of my family to keep putting pressure on me to take it off, even my dad is trying to get me to take it off, the think that I'm not happy and I'm not living my life properly as I should in this age e.g. Going out with boys wearing what I want etc


But if you want to wear it then you can , tbh its your decision as you are doing the right thing, well maybe you can ask your parents why they dont want you to wear it and you can tell them the benefits of how it has helped you and your faith?
Original post by Future.
If that works for her, why not?


Original post by glad-he-ate-her
If she feels more comfortable and happy wearing it, then its none of your business,take your thinly veiled islamophobia somewhere else. Should be her decision to wear or not, you wouldnt try to force a muslim woman who doesnt wear it to wear it so why vice versa?


I have no issue with it, and at no point have I told her to stop wearing it, I'm just enquiring into why she feels that she has to wear it to be a better version of herself.
Original post by Zaydy3
Wear it. Just because you are further ahead in your journey than your mother so what? Im assuming she doesn't wear it and therefore almost wants you also not to because she isn't strong enough to yet. You do you and don't worry about what she says. In Islam, the only time when you do not have to listen to your parents is when they are trying to tell you something against the teachings of your religion. in this instance God allows you to disobey her as you are doing something to please him.


Thank you, she does wear it and she's much more religious than me. Like me and her have differences over stuff written in the Qu'ran and stuff and the way Islam is interpreted and stuff. Thank you so much, I'll try and convince her but the problem is I don't know how to
Reply 24
Original post by SmurfyZ
Respect to you my sister.







Original post by Anonymous
But she'd stop talking to me or something lol, and get the rest of my family to keep putting pressure on me to take it off, even my dad is trying to get me to take it off, the think that I'm not happy and I'm not living my life properly as I should in this age e.g. Going out with boys wearing what I want etc


But you are wearing what you want to wear? Can't you just tell them that?
Original post by (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ
I have no issue with it, and at no point have I told her to stop wearing it, I'm just enquiring into why she feels that she has to wear it to be a better version of herself.


Whatever helps you be a better person, you should do, no matter what it is.
Reply 27
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you, she does wear it and she's much more religious than me. Like me and her have differences over stuff written in the Qu'ran and stuff and the way Islam is interpreted and stuff. Thank you so much, I'll try and convince her but the problem is I don't know how to


It's hard but do it for your faith x
Original post by _gcx
But you are wearing what you want to wear? Can't you just tell them that?


I have! Like everyday they just feel like I'm doing it due to like being brainwashed by some muslamics or something but I'm actually not. I think they just find the drastic change a bit too weird
Original post by Anonymous
I have! Like everyday they just feel like I'm doing it due to like being brainwashed by some muslamics or something but I'm actually not. I think they just find the drastic change a bit too weird


There's not much that you can do. There's no way that you can "convince" your parents to change their mind, they'll just get used to it.
Original post by Anonymous
Hey basically I started to wear the scarf last year, I was never too religious, like always been moderate. I'm not the best of Muslims, like I've had boyfriends and stuff (before wearing it). I decided to wear it because I felt that if I was going to wearing when I'm older I might aswell start wearing it and it may help me to become a better person- and it really has. Now my mum is putting constant pressure on me to take it off and somewhat forcing me, and don't want to because I actually don't mind wearing it, she feels like I'm "not living my life" and "it's too early" I know that many of you will find it weird, but coming from a North African background doesn't mean that we're like strict full on Muslims. I really don't want to take it off and I've spoken to her many times about it but she's the type to always get her word down, I really don't know what to do!
Thanks


Don't listen to her. In Islam, you aren't supposed to listen to your parents when they tell you to do wrong!

Personally, I have worn the hijab since I was 5, and I think it's never too early to start wearing the hijab. :smile:

Wishing you all the best!
Original post by Anonymous
I can, no I told her that I was old enough to do want I want etc, I told her if she wanted me to take it off then she should take it off herself


The "I'm old enough to do what I want" argument comes of as rebellious and tiny bit rude, I would think you'd be better off trying to get her to see it from the viewpoint you've given me, explain how you feel it helps you to hold better values and go from there.

If she still doesn't warm up to the idea of it then I wouldn't let that stop you, if you truly feel that by wearing the hijab it helps to make you a better person then by all means continue to do so, whether she approves with it or not.
Original post by Lychee627
But if you want to wear it then you can , tbh its your decision as you are doing the right thing, well maybe you can ask your parents why they dont want you to wear it and you can tell them the benefits of how it has helped you and your faith?

I have, Ive told them that it reminds me to pray not lie etc. But they know that I can do this without wearing it. I also think it's because they themselves aren't supportive of the idea of a girl wearing the hijab 'early', they think that I should 'enjoy ' my life first and then take the decision to do so. They also think that I'm doing it for them or under the influence of someone
Original post by (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ
So you need to wear an article of clothing to remind you to be a decent human being?


Not wholly relevant to your point, but some do find their attire makes them work better in the office (wearing a suit vs JD Sports wardrobe).

In this case however, psychologically it will impact on one's interactions as when wearing it, they are further reminded why they are wearing it - usually they wanted to change themselves in some ways.

It's like in Ramadan people seem to hold their tongue better, not because you need to fast to not scream explicits, but it heightens your sense of self-awareness.
Original post by Anonymous
I have, Ive told them that it reminds me to pray not lie etc. But they know that I can do this without wearing it. I also think it's because they themselves aren't supportive of the idea of a girl wearing the hijab 'early', they think that I should 'enjoy ' my life first and then take the decision to do so. They also think that I'm doing it for them or under the influence of someone

Well idk how you can convince but one thing ik is that when your mum tells you do something wrong in Islam you shouldnt do it e.g. her not telling you wear the hijaab when in reality you should and you are trying to mashallah, keep making dua to Allah and everything will be okay insha'Allah, keep wearing it :h:
(edited 6 years ago)
Reply 35
Original post by ClearSky
Don't listen to her. In Islam, you aren't supposed to listen to your parents when they tell you to do wrong!

Personally, I have worn the hijab since I was 5, and I think it's never too early to start wearing the hijab. :smile:

Wishing you all the best!


Since you were 5!?? Respect to you then.:happy2:
Original post by Future.
Since you were 5!?? Respect to you then.:happy2:


Lol yeah, my parents weren't even that practising then but I wanted to be a 'big girl' :lol:

Now they're strict though, my mum started wearing a niqaab almost 5 years ago :biggrin:
Original post by (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ
So you need to wear an article of clothing to remind you to be a decent human being?


like some women are empowered by wearing makeup, others feel more confident from wearing a hijab.
Original post by Thomazo
Why would you make a bog deal out of wesring some garment, there's nothing soecial about it. Stop being superstitious.


I would recommend spelling classes. There are some good ones out there, you know.
Reply 39
Continue to wear the hijab as much as you can insha'Allah. Try to convince her that this is the command of Allah (swt), your Lord, and that it is also your choice. Strive hard to avoid her evil and harm as much as you can but don't disrespect your mum and show good character to her. By doing good deeds and maintaining good character, she will believe you more and insha'Allah (God willing) accept your decision. Seek the help of Allah (swt) and ask Him to guide her and Protect you from her evil insha'Allah.

May Allah (swt) reward you abundantly for your efforts and struggles and may He ease your affairs. Aameen

(Accidentally deleted it lol)

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