Spending too much time with the other half?

i've been with my boyfriend for about a month now. we met at uni, and since then we've seen each other pretty much everyday and we stay at each others most nights. but i've recently been thinking, is it a good idea to do this? is it bad to spend too much time together? i was thinking, what if we broke up.. i'd be so used to spending time with him it would suck to suddenly be alone so much. can spending too much time together be bad? your thoughts? ...

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Reply 1

squeak

if you're enjoying yourself, and don't feel uncomfortable then where's the harm?

Reply 2

.AJ.

^ aslong as none of you feel 'smothered'

Reply 3

ßlαcksωαn

It depends on how reliant you are on him and each other. You should never live a life where you are totally reliant on them, you should date like ur 'together' but also that you can still breathe on your own. Are you worried you're on the verge of splitting up?
I also think that spending every minute together could drive you apart. You need to be apart sometimes to miss them, then the reunion would be better. I dunno.

Reply 4

h82think

Do not ignore your girl friends! It is most important to spend at least a few nights a week with them, in order to build friendships. You can always go to your bf afterwards. There is a chance you and your bf will not break up, but no one knows what is round the next corner.

Reply 5

randomgirl

As long as you don't neglect other areas of your life, e.g. seeing family, friends and doing your uni work, then you'll probably be fine.

Reply 6

Nix!

There's nothing worse then someone dropping off the radar just to spend time with their other half! I suggest you find a balance. Don't spend every waking moment with him as the relationship will quickly grow stale. The time apart is just as important as the time spent together.

Reply 7

-Cailin-dana-

my boyfriend lives in ireland i live in thailand we see eachother every 4 months -yet i still get sick of him just because we txt and call everyday - but i dont know what id do if i didnt have him - i think you should enjoy every moment of it!

Reply 8

jenren22

I only see my boyfriend at weekends. He lives in York and i live in Leeds. Luckily i go to uni in York but i rarely see him during the week. Some weeks i see him more than once, but it's usually no more than 2/3 times a week. Sometimes i wish i saw him more but it's great seeing him when i do. And we've been together 4 months now.

I dont have much time during the week anyway, with uni work etc. It works out quite well really...i always look forward to the weekend! You do have to be careful it doesnt go stale, especially at the start. I suppose if one was to live with the other later in the relationship that would be different...but when you're just building a relationship in the earlier stages it's always best to keep up that excitement for as long as you can.

Reply 9

dita_parlo

Well I'm the total opposite to most of the other posters here; ever since the beginning I have seen my boyfriend pretty much every single day, we always used to spend every night together... Although he works full time during the day and I'm at uni so it was only the evenings we spent together, but it has worked for us. I love being with him, and vice versa. Now we live together and things are great. Every relationship is different - I never worried that we were spending too much time together and neither did he. If you ARE worried, take a step back and go on some girly nights out with your mates :smile:

Reply 10

stacey4415

No it's not a good idea, because, if you break up you will have nothing to do!
Make someone your everything, when they have gone you have nothing..i did this, and at the time i wouldn't listen to advice, i had to learn the hard way which i guess is the only way, as even if we do tell you it is too much time, it's unlikely (no offence intended) that you will drastically cut the amount of time you see him!

Good luck anyway!! :smile:

Reply 11

-Cailin-dana-

* talk to him about it!

Reply 12

username47781

Long as you are both happy with it and neither of you feel suffocated then it's fine. Obviously both of you will need personal space from time to time.

Reply 13

Dream_Catcher

It's fine to spend a lot of time together as long as that's what you both want. And you don't become reliant on each other. Also make sure that the other areas of your life are balanced out. I'm not saying that you will break up or that you won't as you never know what's going to happen. But it's good to have other areas to fall back on.

Also being with each other 24/7 may lead to boredom, arguements, and depression. As you'd have nothing new to do or talk about (less your into everything). You can't miss someone if they already with you...

Reply 14

fairycakes

hey,

when i was in first year and secnd year, i had a bf with whom i spent all my with. like apart from lctures basically i spent all my time with him. lookingo back now, i think it was not the best thing to do. i shoul have spent more time with friends and other interests, possibly more time on school work? i think it contributed to making me clingy and reliant on people. and it when we split up, it was such a shock to the system, in terms of having someone there all the timoe,a nd he wasn't there anymore. i think i became addicted to him. also it's hard to really see the relationship for what it was. it's just comfortable and routine.

i hope i've helped. but i know it's so hard to spend less time iwth him. it's so tempting to, when u can. but with my new bf, i'm really tryin hard to keep a gd balance with everything i have in my life. i really don't want to be clingy and feel like i need him.

xxxx

Reply 15

JC.

I don't think there is any hard and fast rules tbh.

Personally, I enjoy spending time on my own in the garage. Its about finding a balance. I could quite happily spend every minute of the day rebuilding engines and getting tanked up on beer. By the same token I could have spent everyday with my last g/f and not got annoyed.

If it feels right go with it!

Reply 16

Meep!

I have to say I see no problem with spending too much time with my other half. I only see my bf every other weekend during term, as we're at different unis, but in the holidays, he lives with me.

The big problem is that when it comes to term time again, it's bloody hard to say goodbye :frown:

Reply 17

suicidal_dream

do what you think is right.

as long as you're not getting totally reliant on each other.

when i go home at weekends or during the hols, my boyf and i spend so much time together - we used to spend pretty much all day and all evening together when neither of us had a full-time job.

every relationship is different.

make sure you both get a chance to see your friends too though!

Reply 18

CheesyBeans

I'm constantly with my boyfriend but then again we've been together about 2 years rather than a month. At the start, for the first 6 months or so, we saw a lot of each other but we also had loads of time apart. Then he moved in and now I'm with him all the time. I love having him around. However, we don't spend all our time alone. We hang around with our housemates or friends and we do go out separatly aswell. He's not just my 'lover', he's my best friend too *pukes*.

Reply 19

Vohamanah

Me and my boyfriend went on a date on 24th January 2005 and have hardly been apart since that day. It wasn't like a conscious thing, our 'date' just ran over I guess. But there's nothing wrong with spending a lot of time with someone if you are happy doing that. I'm not sure if it sounds like you are, though.

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