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Curfew issues
Please keep this anon..
Im in my last year of school and I like going out as much as the next person but my mum is so gay and says I have to be back home at 12. In the past I would go out a lot later, and never follow my curfew ending up in huge rows with my mum, don't want that anymore but still want a decent curfew i.e. 1:30-2. What do I do? My mum is conservative which doesn't help.
Im in my last year of school and I like going out as much as the next person but my mum is so gay and says I have to be back home at 12. In the past I would go out a lot later, and never follow my curfew ending up in huge rows with my mum, don't want that anymore but still want a decent curfew i.e. 1:30-2. What do I do? My mum is conservative which doesn't help.
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What do you do? Well, as I see it, you have 3 options:
1) Be a stroppy teenager and flaunt her curfew, then get in trouble.
2) Obey the curfew, then have a row with her later because "it's so unfair."
3) Grow up, talk to her sensibly like an adult about why you'd like to be allowed out a bit later (not just "everyone else is allowed") and ask her what her worries are - she's not just doing it to spoil your fun!
She may have all sorts of reasons for not letting you, especially if you're expecting her to pick you up/stay awake to let you in etc. Talk to her properly. But at the end of the day you really ought to respect her decision.
1) Be a stroppy teenager and flaunt her curfew, then get in trouble.
2) Obey the curfew, then have a row with her later because "it's so unfair."
3) Grow up, talk to her sensibly like an adult about why you'd like to be allowed out a bit later (not just "everyone else is allowed") and ask her what her worries are - she's not just doing it to spoil your fun!
She may have all sorts of reasons for not letting you, especially if you're expecting her to pick you up/stay awake to let you in etc. Talk to her properly. But at the end of the day you really ought to respect her decision.
Reply 2
I know you don't agree with her, but your mum might just to make sure you're properly rested during your last year at school. It's understandable that she's concerned about you, because staying out so late can have knock-on effects - particularly if you're going to be disturbing her (or any other members of your family). I know my mum stays up worrying whenever I'm out late, and I wouldn't want to put her through that until 2am (I live in South London and I can understand why she'd want to wait up).
If you're so upset about this, you should have a chat to her to try and understand why she's not so keen on you staying out late. I know you'd prefer to have your own way, but you may find that her decision is not so unreasonable after all.
If you're so upset about this, you should have a chat to her to try and understand why she's not so keen on you staying out late. I know you'd prefer to have your own way, but you may find that her decision is not so unreasonable after all.
Reply 4
Well while you live under her roof, it is her rules.
Reply 5
Agreed with the others. But also you need to show her that your studies won't be effected and that your responible enough not to get in any kind of trouble. By arguing with her in a childish way and/or not obeying her rules your showing her that she can't trust you. While saying this what's to say if she gives in and lets you stay out later your not going to break that "curfew" to?
Your still legally a child and she's only doing it in your best interests, even if it does effect your social life.
Also as already asked: What are you doing at 12-2 in the morning?
Your still legally a child and she's only doing it in your best interests, even if it does effect your social life.
Also as already asked: What are you doing at 12-2 in the morning?
Anonymous
my mum is so gay
^o)
http://www.yourdictionary.com/gay
you sound like an immature child.
Until I moved out when I was almost 19, I had to be in BED by 11pm (except for once in a while if I asked special permission to go clubbing).
You've got nothing to complain about so get over it. And whilst you're at it, stop insulting your mother!
Until I moved out when I was almost 19, I had to be in BED by 11pm (except for once in a while if I asked special permission to go clubbing).
You've got nothing to complain about so get over it. And whilst you're at it, stop insulting your mother!
Reply 10
If she is worried about you coming home at such a time, tell her it is safer because you will be coming home with your friends rather than leaving early and coming home alone.
I can't believe the people saying its reasonable for an 18 year old to be asked to come home at 12.
Most clubs arn't even underway by then.
I can understand why you want a later curfew..and a social life lol.
Are you male or female? Annoying as it is mums do tend to worry more about girls coming home on their own late at night, perhaps say you will come home with a friend.
Also you should just sit down and reasonably ask for a later curfew.
This said, its a friday or saturday night thing. School is especially imp. this year and you should make sure your work doesn't suffer.
Most clubs arn't even underway by then.
I can understand why you want a later curfew..and a social life lol.
Are you male or female? Annoying as it is mums do tend to worry more about girls coming home on their own late at night, perhaps say you will come home with a friend.
Also you should just sit down and reasonably ask for a later curfew.
This said, its a friday or saturday night thing. School is especially imp. this year and you should make sure your work doesn't suffer.
Reply 13
I agree with Helenia here. Personally I would go for option 3 - will make life so much easier in the long run! 
Reply 14
12 is hardly early, get a grip.
I think if your clubbin or it's a friends party it's understandable why you may want to come home later than normal. Can't you reach a compromise with your mum in these circumstances but then be home by her time every other time. That way your getting the best of both because your not flounting her rules and she'll respect you for that yet your still getting occasional late nights for clubbin and stuff.
Reply 16
Assuming your wanting to go out friday and staurday nights (and have no commitments over the weekend) try taking the conversation down the "but its the weekend and I don't have to get up early" route.
If your curfew is because of her concern for your well-being, try to negotiate something with her involving you phoning/texting her at midnight to let her know where you are and roughly what time you'll be back and that your ok.
If your talking about going out on a weeknight with school in the morning or at the weekend with work in the morning then I'm on your mum's side, you shouldn't be staying up later than that on a school night (7 hours sleep minimum and all that)
If your curfew is because of her concern for your well-being, try to negotiate something with her involving you phoning/texting her at midnight to let her know where you are and roughly what time you'll be back and that your ok.
If your talking about going out on a weeknight with school in the morning or at the weekend with work in the morning then I'm on your mum's side, you shouldn't be staying up later than that on a school night (7 hours sleep minimum and all that)
Reply 17
12 is more than neough for your age, jeez.
Are you out drinking drinking or somehting?
Are you out drinking drinking or somehting?
Reply 18
my parents were funny about my curfew but now I'm 18 they don't bother arguing!
one of my friends had this system for coming home late: an alarm clock on the stairs which she would turn off when she got back. If she wasn't back it would go off an wake her parents and they could worry.
not ideal but one idea.
i reckon if you can find something your mum feels comfortable with you have far more chance of winning her over. find out what it is about you eing out that actually worries her and maybe you can find a way around it? If you can agree on something life will be easier!
And to all the people who say 17 is too young to be going out... WHAT????? that's so patronising. What is so magical about that 1 day difference between 17 and 18? you don't suddenly get the urge to go out on your 18th. 17 yr olds have social lives too!
one of my friends had this system for coming home late: an alarm clock on the stairs which she would turn off when she got back. If she wasn't back it would go off an wake her parents and they could worry.
not ideal but one idea.
i reckon if you can find something your mum feels comfortable with you have far more chance of winning her over. find out what it is about you eing out that actually worries her and maybe you can find a way around it? If you can agree on something life will be easier!
And to all the people who say 17 is too young to be going out... WHAT????? that's so patronising. What is so magical about that 1 day difference between 17 and 18? you don't suddenly get the urge to go out on your 18th. 17 yr olds have social lives too!
Reply 19
Right well I came back home last night at 2:30, my curfew was 12:30, not bad considering last time I went out I came home at 4.
I'm a girl so that is part of the reason but that SUCKS, I live in a really safe city. So it's really no reason. And basically yeah I need to go out clubbing every now and then to see my friends from other schools and just let loose, and it was a friend's birthday last night so yeah. Other 17 year olds have a late curfew so I don't get why so many people here are complaining about me being unhappy with mine
I'm a girl so that is part of the reason but that SUCKS, I live in a really safe city. So it's really no reason. And basically yeah I need to go out clubbing every now and then to see my friends from other schools and just let loose, and it was a friend's birthday last night so yeah. Other 17 year olds have a late curfew so I don't get why so many people here are complaining about me being unhappy with mine
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