Getting closer to friends

I have about 6people I'd call close friends at uni, and quite a few people who I know through other friends, and quite a few here and there who we'd say hi to each other and chat for a bit but nothing more.
I'd like to have more close friends e.g. the kind of people who are in touch from a day to day basis etc and often arrange to do stuff with and arrange to go on nights out together with other friends.

What are good ways to develop friendships? I'm not the most outgoing kind of guy and am quite quiet, which makes it hard. E.g. If there's someone you have good chats with during the day if bump into them, but never see them apart from that, what kind of steps could I take to get closer friends with them?
Sorry I know this is a bit waffly and may sound bit stupid, but would really like some advice if possible.

Reply 1

Nix!

11

"You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you." - Dale Carnegie

Reply 2

Hana_87

16

I think that if you make effort to suggest to meet up with these people, you may find yourself with more of a social life in terms of going out, etc. But as the above post quotes, if you try too hard to make people like you, well, it kind of doesn't work like that, :s-smilie:

Just be friendly and make lots of effort :smile:

Reply 3

FreeBird

I'm the type of person who doesnt think you can force close friendships, they just sort of happen. You need to connect with the person, be able to talk basically about anything or nothing and still have a good time.

First steps to finding out whether you make any such connection though, would definitely be more communication. Talk to people more, make an effort to organise things with them, chatting on facebook or any other such site is also good for talking to people you dont normally get the opportunity during the day or whatever. Dont try too hard tho, or you'll come across as a weirdo lol Just be chatty and friendly (but not in a creepy interrupting other peoples conversations kinda way). :smile:

Reply 4

Glassylicious

Yes, Freebird's advice is good. You'd do good to follow what she says. =P

Always remember not to overdo it. Close friendships take time to foster. If you try to take things too quickly, you'll actually end up driving people away. Just be friendly, take it easy, there's no rush.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Cool, sounds good this advice.
So e.g. there's someone who I get along with, and have long conversations whenever we cross paths. How do you suggest moving it along from there. Not looking for dating nb/, just to be closer friends so arrange to meet and do stuff rather than just the chance meetings. I always find in uni it's tricky as everyone seems to be tied to their corridors from 1st year (not always, but often), and not easy breaking them away from that.

Reply 6

Glassylicious

Anonymous

Cool, sounds good this advice.
So e.g. there's someone who I get along with, and have long conversations whenever we cross paths. How do you suggest moving it along from there. Not looking for dating nb/, just to be closer friends so arrange to meet and do stuff rather than just the chance meetings. I always find in uni it's tricky as everyone seems to be tied to their corridors from 1st year (not always, but often), and not easy breaking them away from that.

Well, for starters, finding out that person's interests would be good. Does he/she participate in any extra-curricular activities? Member of any societies, perhaps? If the both of you happen to share interests or happen to be members of the same society, you can arrange to attend society meetings together and so on. Common interests are good.

Getting closer to friends

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