Join TSR now for chat about life, relationships, fashion and more…Sign up now

does this girl have a problem with me? Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    She's a close friend of one of my best friends ,and she's about 6 years older than me. The very first time I met her, she was cold as ice.. I introduced myself as being the friend of my friend, and that it was nice to meet her etc. and she basically replied with 'ok' and a half smile, and barely spoke to me for the evening.

    It wasn't somebody I was likely to see anytime soon and I quickly forgot about it. My friend told me that it just 'took time for her to warm to people'.

    Anyway, I didn't see her after that for several months. I saw her again on a night out and at first it was a bit awkward,my friend left the room and I didn't really know what to say but tried to make some conversation, and she responded in a friendly manner so that was cool, and then we went to a club so we danced together and stuff.

    I added her on facebook and sent her a message saying it had been nice to see her, and I can't remember exactly what I said but I had received a message from a guy she also knew, so I told her.

    Anyway, after about 2 messages she stopped replying and then I didn't think any more of it.

    Not long after that , my friend told me that this girl was looking for a new housemate, and had asked me to pass on the message. Apparntly she'd 'considered' me as I seemed quiet, clean etc. and I admit that I was really flattered.

    However, I really wasn't sure if I could take the room, so I sent her a message explaining my work/housing situation and why it'd be too risky, but that if my situation changed then I'd let her know.

    She replied with a slightly cold message even though I knew I'd done nothing wrong and had even offered to help look for a housemate.

    She was doing a charity run so I donated some money, even though I didn't know her super well, and she said we should meet up soon.

    A few weeks later, she sent another message saying that I could move in without paying a deposit and paying a reduced rent as she was desperate. I replied explaining that I really would have liked to but that again my job and situation were not sure and that i'd let her know if it changed etc.

    Again a cold and short reply... I just forgot about it as I had not done anything wrong and it wasn't my obligation to help her pay the rent.

    A few weeks after that, I dyed my friend's hair. My friend then told me that this girl had seen it, said i'd done a crappy job basically, and that next time, she was going to do it instead.

    I found a job abroad so I sent a message to this girl telling her, saying that I hoped to see her before I went, and asked if she'd found a roommate. No reply..

    However, apparently she moaned to my friend the next day that i'd sent 'Another long message'... It was maybe 4 lines at most, and it would have taken her seconds t oreply.

    We went on a night out and she was there, so I knew it would be a little awkward. We were at the bar and she literally offered to buy my friend and the other girl a drink, but for me it was sort of 'pay your own'.

    I just ignored her and I think she picked up on it and tried to make some kind of friendly conversation, so I just tried to be polite but nothing more.

    then, the 3 of us left the club and were walking, and because she was tipsy they were walking at a mile per hour, giggling etc. and I was just walking along in silence not really knowing what to say.. it was a bit awkward.

    I thought she was nice and that we could try and become friends but after all, she's not really my cup of tea. I find her rude and incinscere. Does it sound like she might have a problem with me? I'll have to see her in some social situations, but I'll just have to try to be polite and civil but that's it...
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    It could be jealousy. She thinks you're "competing" for your friend's attention when it could be much easier and fulfilling to just set differences aside and be a group of three friends?
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    You don't like each other
    That's fine
    It all sounds a bit immature
    Don't spoil it for your mutual friend
    She doesn't have to choose between you
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I find it immature yes, given that I'm 26 and she's 32. I honestly have no desire to compete, they spend more time together than me and my friend do and it doesn't bother me whatsoever... i've tried to be polite with her and I've never spoken badly behind her back but it's her who has done so... anyway, I guess all I can do is be polite.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Why are you so neurotic?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I'd say leave it, there's no reason to waste your time with someone whose obviously not willing to put any effort into maintaining a friendship with you. Focus on the people who want to be around you.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She's a close friend of one of my best friends ,and she's about 6 years older than me. The very first time I met her, she was cold as ice.. I introduced myself as being the friend of my friend, and that it was nice to meet her etc. and she basically replied with 'ok' and a half smile, and barely spoke to me for the evening.

    It wasn't somebody I was likely to see anytime soon and I quickly forgot about it. My friend told me that it just 'took time for her to warm to people'.

    Anyway, I didn't see her after that for several months. I saw her again on a night out and at first it was a bit awkward,my friend left the room and I didn't really know what to say but tried to make some conversation, and she responded in a friendly manner so that was cool, and then we went to a club so we danced together and stuff.

    I added her on facebook and sent her a message saying it had been nice to see her, and I can't remember exactly what I said but I had received a message from a guy she also knew, so I told her.

    Anyway, after about 2 messages she stopped replying and then I didn't think any more of it.

    Not long after that , my friend told me that this girl was looking for a new housemate, and had asked me to pass on the message. Apparntly she'd 'considered' me as I seemed quiet, clean etc. and I admit that I was really flattered.

    However, I really wasn't sure if I could take the room, so I sent her a message explaining my work/housing situation and why it'd be too risky, but that if my situation changed then I'd let her know.

    She replied with a slightly cold message even though I knew I'd done nothing wrong and had even offered to help look for a housemate.

    She was doing a charity run so I donated some money, even though I didn't know her super well, and she said we should meet up soon.

    A few weeks later, she sent another message saying that I could move in without paying a deposit and paying a reduced rent as she was desperate. I replied explaining that I really would have liked to but that again my job and situation were not sure and that i'd let her know if it changed etc.

    Again a cold and short reply... I just forgot about it as I had not done anything wrong and it wasn't my obligation to help her pay the rent.

    A few weeks after that, I dyed my friend's hair. My friend then told me that this girl had seen it, said i'd done a crappy job basically, and that next time, she was going to do it instead.

    I found a job abroad so I sent a message to this girl telling her, saying that I hoped to see her before I went, and asked if she'd found a roommate. No reply..

    However, apparently she moaned to my friend the next day that i'd sent 'Another long message'... It was maybe 4 lines at most, and it would have taken her seconds t oreply.

    We went on a night out and she was there, so I knew it would be a little awkward. We were at the bar and she literally offered to buy my friend and the other girl a drink, but for me it was sort of 'pay your own'.

    I just ignored her and I think she picked up on it and tried to make some kind of friendly conversation, so I just tried to be polite but nothing more.

    then, the 3 of us left the club and were walking, and because she was tipsy they were walking at a mile per hour, giggling etc. and I was just walking along in silence not really knowing what to say.. it was a bit awkward.

    I thought she was nice and that we could try and become friends but after all, she's not really my cup of tea. I find her rude and incinscere. Does it sound like she might have a problem with me? I'll have to see her in some social situations, but I'll just have to try to be polite and civil but that's it...
    JESUS FCK MAN! STOP BEING A LITTLE PUSSY! Dash the b1tch out the way and tell her to piss the fck off. Grow a pair man
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    Forget her.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    thanks for the replies! Yeah, I can conclude she's really not worth bothering about. Anyway I'm moving abroad in 2 weeks and she will be a distant memory
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    she's not worth it
    leave her be
    she's obviously jealous of you
    no need to ruin a friendship over her
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by charles dickens)
    she's not worth it
    leave her be
    she's obviously jealous of you
    no need to ruin a friendship over her
    thanks yeah you are right1 I shouldn't fret over her... i just wanted to know if it was me being paranoid or not. I can't think of a reason why she'd be jealous of me.. I mean she's very pretty and everything and seems to have a successful life.. but yeah who knows..
 
 
 
Write a reply… Reply
Submit reply
Updated: July 16, 2017
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Poll
How are you feeling about Results Day?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Quick reply
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.