I feel miserable in University

I recently enrolled in a university in my local area and it has the course that I wanted but the place here is making me miserable. I have tried my best to adapt to this place but I really can't. This isn't my first time in Universiry, I went for a whole year in another Univeraity to do my foundation and I wasn't this miserable. Once I have come here, I can't even bring myself to go to classes. I feel so depressed and anxious of others. I stay in my room the whole day and onlt come out to use the toilet. I don't eat because I have no appetite. I wish I could tell my parents but they put in a lot of effort in trying to get me accepted in this uni. I wanted to drop out but they were so proud of me for getting in and constantly reminding me of how lucky I am to be here. I don't have the heart to break theirs.

Reply 1

ashaxo99

have you tried talking to your parents and telling them how you're feeling? is there anything small that you could easily change to make you feel better, like maybe being more sociable and making new friends? don't feel anxious of people! im sure they're super friendly once you approach them. if you don't like this university, are there any other unis you'd be able to go to instead?

it's always important to put yourself and your happiness + wellbeing first and you need to do what's best for you. at the end of the day, your parents will be proud of you despite where you graduate from and it's important that you enjoy these years of your life as well as your university experience. if you're unhappy please don't suffer in silence and get something changed bc you deserve to have an amazing time :smile:

Reply 2

thebluebottle

You sound very unhappy, and I don't believe for a moment that your parents value your current choice of university over your well-being. The first thing I would suggest is to share your feelings with your parents – tell them that you feel miserable and anxious to the point that you are shutting yourself in your room and losing your appetite. Getting some support from your loved ones is very important, especially if you are worried about disappointing them – it will feel good to get some confirmation that they care about you, primarily, not your degree.

Otherwise, I think it can be helpful to pinpoint what it is that is making you feel so bad. I mean, what would you change about your situation if you could? Are you struggling with your course, or not enjoying it as you expected to? Do you feel lonely or homesick? Are you nervous about attending lectures? Does the location of the uni feel completely wrong?

Remember that changing your mind is not a bad thing, and that it's important to take your feelings seriously. I was in a very similar situation to you in 2015 (miserable at university, but feeling like I'd be a failure if I dropped out), so I just wanted to say that it's not as if the only alternative road from here is to turn your back on all of your ambitions. It might make you feel a lot better to change your accommodation, switch your course, have a look at other universities that you could transfer to, or take a step away from university altogether and go back later with a clearer head.

I feel miserable in University

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