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The lines of Love, Lust, And Loneliness. Watch

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    The Lines of Love, Lust, and Loneliness.
    What follows below could be described as a rant, or as an accademic piece on what I think love and loneliness to consist of. Feel free to give your comments, whether it relates to it or not, but as the reader I would consider below to be a poorly formed poem, so just enjoy. Thought I'd post on here, because, well, I'm alone. Here goes :

    So I've decided that I hate camping. No maybe not, I thinks it's more accurate to say that I hate camping alone. So many people but such little interaction and when interaction does occur, it seems forced.

    Loneliness is such a simple concept and so easy to just blow off as nothing but it hurts. Seeing people with company, girlfriends, mum's, siblings- jealousy writhes within me. But I chose this. I knew deep down it would be like this, yet I chose it anyway. Am I punishing myself? I don't know. But I know that for the past 5 days I've been dreaming about Abbie nonstop, and it's not fading. I thought coming out here and being alone would fade the feeling but it's not. If anything; intensified. This is horrible. I hate the feeling in my stomach, dragging me down to a level where I don't want to be. Having a partner is an amazing thing, but the aftermath? I suppose it is for the reader to decide if they deem the good times to be worth this killing pain.
    For me? I don't know. I am somewhat a man of two states; euphoria and self loathing. I don't really seem to have a middle ground. Of course, both categories have sub sections; happy, upset, excited, anxious; yet nonetheless the line of happiness is a distinct one.
    I suppose what I was before I met Abbie was in the middle; just okay, but now.... the middle seems unachievable. Just down, or temporarily raised in excitement/ fear in an activity, but always below the metaphoric line. Will I put myself in a relationship again? Of course. I am weak, I give into the temporary temptation of comfort and consolation; it's what a crave deep down- to be 'loved'. But what is love? It seems to be the A* of all the Grades, and whilst other grades come close to it, they are still lust. For so many partners who once 'loved' end up breaking, so really, can we call what they had love?
    I believe it to be a line of Love and Lust; the latter easier to achieve and fall into, but the first so much more binding. The problem (I have found), is when one has loved and one has lusted to a high grade (an A if you like), the two, whilst caring so much for each other, are still incompatible, for no matter how hard the luster tries, the line is not broken into love. But I am weak, so I love.
    I hate camping, I'm alone enough to come out with rants like this.

    EDIT: Okay so my camping experience has admittedly levelled out a bit now as I wrote this on a particularly down day, but the principles still stand. Fml I must have been on my man period to come out with the above.
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    this is so interesting
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    Glad you think so ahah
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    (Original post by sammorgan99)
    Glad you think so ahah
    its interesting cause its what u think from deep down
    especially this part :

    the two, whilst caring so much for each other, are still incompatible, for no matter how hard the luster tries, the line is not broken into love.
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    (Original post by tamil fever)
    its interesting cause its what u think from deep down
    especially this part :

    the two, whilst caring so much for each other, are still incompatible, for no matter how hard the luster tries, the line is not broken into love.
    Yeah it was very much written mid tear, didn't even intend to post it at first, I just wrote it in notes. Quite glad to have given people an insight into how I feel
 
 
 
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