Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
x Turn on thread page Beta
    • #1
    • Thread Starter

    I've been dating my current girlfriend since November- we met in October.
    It all happened very intensely and fast.

    Long story short, her friend and I have always got along well and laugh together etc, and I'm not making this up but the sexual tension is so obvious that my girlfriend has asked me if i find her attractive before which i said no. (because its the "right" thing to say)

    This morning it was the same thing, she composes herself in a way to not be obvious in front of my girlfriend so i think she's trying to be a good friend...

    I just can't take her out of my mind I feel like a bad person.

    It's been going on fora while...

    I'm not an idiot I think it's more than just being friendly and she's not the same with other people.

    Is it worth talking about it with my girlfriend? (I don't want to hurt her It could ruin things for a while )
    I can't just "ignore" anyone we all socialise that would be weird and childish... ?

    I can just force myself to not feel ...

    I dont know..

    Any general advice? & no hate please or I'd rather not ask on here...

    Be open because if it's not meant to be with your girlfriend, it's not meant to be. It's better to be open than cheat, that will hurt her more and you don't want to be stringing her along when she could be with someone who thinks of her only. It's not good for the both of you. And you don't want to bottle things up inside.
    • #2

    You have to ask yourself whether or not you like the friend and if yes-is it only because things with your current gf have 'settled'or become less exciting. Ignore the fact that the two girls know each other. Which one would you rather wake up next to. Which one do you want.

    If I am being brutally honest -

    Having a strong attraction to another girl is a strong indication your current relationship isn't for you.
    Regardless what happens your current girlfriend will get hurt, whether it is now or later down the line. It happens, and the fact she questions it now proves she isn't stupid either.

    This could cause long term trust issues for her in the future. Even if it is with another man in the future. She has already proven suspicious of your attraction to her friend, and you have told her you are not attracted. When in fact you are.
    If she finds out you lied about it, when her instincts were right, she will struggle trusting you, and may have a long term effect in future scenarios.

    Personally, for both of you, I think you should break it up, your clearly not as attracted to your Girlfriend and have feelings for her friend and like you said it happened fast.

    If you decide to pursue her friend, then give it some time.
    • #4

    What a lovely friend she is
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: July 25, 2017
Have you ever experienced racism/sexism at uni?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.