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Gay muslim coming out to family and very scared Watch

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    (Original post by I_R_FURRY!)
    Thanks for your replies. My fear though is that even when I am at university I am not independent because as soon as I leave if I don't have a graduate job instantly I'll have to go life back at my parents and I hope to have a boyfriend by then. At least when I am at university I can live my life how I want to though which is comforting.
    You are not independent till you have your own income stream and somewhere to live.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    quit porn and masturbation and you will turn straight in a few months
    I was knew I was gay before I ever watched porn...

    Billions of people masturbate and not all of them turn gay. You're talking rubbish.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by I_R_FURRY!)
    I was knew I was gay before I ever watched porn...

    Billions of people masturbate and not all of them turn gay. You're talking rubbish.
    did I say every masturbator turns gay? I'm not talking rubbish at all there's research behind what I'm saying kid.
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    (Original post by shameful_burrito)
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    (Original post by shameful_burrito)
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    Bring up the subject without directly coming out as gay. Maybe say you watched a show about a homosexual muslim coming out to his/her parents and see what reaction your family have. You could also claim that in the 'programme', despite his/her family disagreeing with his/her homosexuality, they still chose to love and accept him/her.

    I'm not sure if this will yield any positive results but it seems like a decent way to gage what their reaction might be if you did come out as gay.


    Good luck on whatever you choose to do.
    • #3
    #3

    Will you be with another guy (e.g. sexual relations) even though it is expliciltiy forbidden? I feel for you, inshallah everything will work out and you are safe. I know exactly how you feel but think I will have to remain chaste for the rest of my life
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    quit porn and masturbation and you will turn straight in a few months
    Wow That's genius.If only the tens of thousands of gay people who have existed over the centuries had simply thought to stop looking at porn and masturbating.I'm sure nobody in the last couple of thousand years had that idea.We are truly blessed to have your insights on this matter.Please enlighten us further.

    Moron.You can't turn straight.
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    RIP
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    (Original post by Robby2312)
    Wow That's genius.If only the tens of thousands of gay people who have existed over the centuries had simply thought to stop looking at porn and masturbating.I'm sure nobody in the last couple of thousand years had that idea.We are truly blessed to have your insights on this matter.Please enlighten us further.

    Moron.You can't turn straight.
    I'm dead RIP :rofl: :rofl:
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    (Original post by I_R_FURRY!)
    Hello all!

    I'm a gay muslim and very proud, I never want to feel like I have to hide my sexuality but its very difficult because of my family, who are all practising muslims. I know the horrendous cruel treatment Islam prescribes for homosexuals and I think it's disgusting. Allah made me a homosexual and I'm not going to suppress my desire for a sexual relationship with another man for my entire life.

    I believe at some point the quran has been changed and the hadiths are often such that "someone said that someone said that Muhammad said" and it sounds a lot like Chinese whispers.

    The fact that my religion has these abominations in it makes me sick but I still do believe in God. Anyway I want to come out to my family but I am terrified they will physically harm me at worst and disown me, kick me out and never speak to me again at best. I live in the UK but I don't think that would stop my dad and brothers from probably severely hurting me because most Muslims are very intolerant of homosexuals and my family have always shown pure hatred for homosexuals and even wished death upon them when they see them on the news. Then I have my community to deal with and I fear being bullied / beaten up around my local area.

    So what do I do? I'm 16 and it will still be some years yet until I am able to be independent so I feel trapped and it's starting to get me depressed. It would be a miracle if they supported me but I am certain they won't. I wish Muslims were more accepting and moved away from the old teachings that are just out of date now and not relevant to this era.

    Any advice?

    Looks like the dunya got to you lol.
    You can be gay and muslim period, Islam wont change because everyone thinks homosexuality is fine.

    You either tell them, and risk being kicked out and disowned (which is very likely) or you just hide it till you leave.
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    You're 16, you're a child, and if you think your family will physically harm you then that's abuse. Do you have any trusted non-muslim adults outside of the family you can talk to about this? Teachers/ tutors or even a friend's parent if you're close with them? I ask because i'm genuinely concerned for your welfare and think you should seek help.
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    (Original post by aware1)
    Looks like the dunya got to you lol.
    You can be gay and muslim period, Islam wont change because everyone thinks homosexuality is fine.

    You either tell them, and risk being kicked out and disowned (which is very likely) or you just hide it till you leave.
    It's a shame islam is so stubborn. The traditional punishments for sins have no place in the 21st century and I believe in the future we will see more acceptance and a more liberal approach to islam.

    Thanks for the support I guess I will just keep it to myself until I become independent.
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    (Original post by I_R_FURRY!)
    It's a shame islam is so stubborn. The traditional punishments for sins have no place in the 21st century and I believe in the future we will see more acceptance and a more liberal approach to islam.

    Thanks for the support I guess I will just keep it to myself until I become independent.
    Islam isnt "stubborn". Its been written for the ages. It will never change no matter what these "progressive" people say.

    Punishments are there for a reason, if we had half of those in the west then most crimes wouldn't even happen. Plus the punishment require things like evidence and repeated offenses, not one time things. Check out countries like dubai or saudi where crime rates are pretty low.

    There will be no "liberal or acceptance". You cant go changing something cause you dont like it. The world doesnt work liek that. e.g. cause we lost in football, we dont make the scores a draw, rules are rules. Either you live by them or you dont.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    did I say every masturbator turns gay? I'm not talking rubbish at all there's research behind what I'm saying kid.
    Show me this "research" you speak of.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    you seem a bit mad, craving for some **** gayboy?
    I hope you are not referring to your own; I suspect I would require the aid of a microscope to find it.
    But no, I just have a low tolerance for stupidity.
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    There is a support organisation/charity for LGBTQ Muslims but I'm not sure how active it is. The website here does have useful material on Islam and sexuality, including something aimed at parents, though.
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    I am Christian not Muslim but the same rule applies

    Let him who is without sin cast the first stone
    We are all sinners. None perfect. Leave the judgement to God
    You have my support
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    Look, let's face it, you will have a 1% chance of changing your parents views on homosexuality. If a large proportion of LGB people have issues 'coming out' to Christian/liberal parents, then you don't have much of a chance. So, wait the 2 years. Work as hard as possible and get ready for your life of freedom at Uni. Your friends may advise you to do different and show support but, they will not be going home to what you will experience. They won't be thinking about you all night long.
    2 years may seem long but it'll speed by with exams etc. Good luck!
    And consider converting religion!!!
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Robby2312)
    I hope you are not referring to your own; I suspect I would require the aid of a microscope to find it.
    But no, I just have a low tolerance for stupidity.
    no thanks I'm straight, you're disgusting.
 
 
 
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