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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I have made a thread before how my ex boyfriend was abusive towards my younger sister who is 5 years old (he's arrested now that no god). I also mentioned that I am the legal guardian of her (I'm 19)

    so I finished my a levels in 2016 and came out with really good grades and i got into my chosen course and uni. however I decided to take a gap year to travel and work. earlier this year my mother passed away. so that left me and my sister. my plan before she died was to start uni this September

    however right now I can't go. I'm still grieving and i need to look after my sister before she starts school again (she's ill).

    I'm working and paying of the rent too. however I'm worried im missing out on life and im not doing things people my age are doing. I would hopefully start uni next year(age 20 and finish at 23) but I feel like people my age would have their lives together by then. earning a decent money where I'm stuck at uni and probably still grieving. I'm 2 years behind and I can't help but think I'm doing really bad

    I can't help but think that I'm missing out on life. i didn't imagine my life to be like this. I have no one . my mum is gone,my friends are gone. I have nothing . just my sister but she's just a child. this is the worst time of my life but I feel things are just gonna get worse and that I am destined to be unhappy

    I wanna be strong for her. I heard people in these sorts of situation get depression. that scares me. i dont wanna be ill. I just want to be happy but i feel so empty inside....
    • #2
    #2

    You sound like you are doing an amazing job BUT you need support too. You have weathered so much at such a young age which says so much about your strength and yet you know things can't go on as they are.

    What support can your Uni offer you and your sister? Where are social services in all this?

    Assume your Uni course local?

    You will make a new life at Uni so don't delay if you can possibly help it.

    I hope other posters can help too.


    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I have made a thread before how my ex boyfriend was abusive towards my younger sister who is 5 years old (he's arrested now that no god). I also mentioned that I am the legal guardian of her (I'm 19)

    so I finished my a levels in 2016 and came out with really good grades and i got into my chosen course and uni. however I decided to take a gap year to travel and work. earlier this year my mother passed away. so that left me and my sister. my plan before she died was to start uni this September

    however right now I can't go. I'm still grieving and i need to look after my sister before she starts school again (she's ill).

    I'm working and paying of the rent too. however I'm worried im missing out on life and im not doing things people my age are doing. I would hopefully start uni next year(age 20 and finish at 23) but I feel like people my age would have their lives together by then. earning a decent money where I'm stuck at uni and probably still grieving. I'm 2 years behind and I can't help but think I'm doing really bad

    I can't help but think that I'm missing out on life. i didn't imagine my life to be like this. I have no one . my mum is gone,my friends are gone. I have nothing . just my sister but she's just a child. this is the worst time of my life but I feel things are just gonna get worse and that I am destined to be unhappy

    I wanna be strong for her. I heard people in these sorts of situation get depression. that scares me. i dont wanna be ill. I just want to be happy but i feel so empty inside....
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You sound like you are doing an amazing job BUT you need support too. You have weathered so much at such a young age which says so much about your strength and yet you know things can't go on as they are.

    What support can your Uni offer you and your sister? Where are social services in all this?

    Assume your Uni course local?

    You will make a new life at Uni so don't delay if you can possibly help it.

    I hope other posters can help too.
    I'm not at uni yet but i will start September 2018 at age 20 (I'm so behind and this scares me ). I have to delay it because my sister is ill. there is no one else that could look after her. i cant afford childcare either. but i can afford rent.
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    Are there any other family members who can give you some support? Unfortunately the fact is that you are gonna miss out on some stuff if you're the sole carer for a 5 year old at your age. I don't think there's any point beating around the bush on that one... it'll be better for you to accept that your life is what it is and hopefully in 10 years time you'll be able to say proudly that yeah, you didn't get pissed every weekend during your uni years but you stepped up and raised a little kid in a tough situation and managed to help her grow into a good person.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by doodle_333)
    Are there any other family members who can give you some support? Unfortunately the fact is that you are gonna miss out on some stuff if you're the sole carer for a 5 year old at your age. I don't think there's any point beating around the bush on that one... it'll be better for you to accept that your life is what it is and hopefully in 10 years time you'll be able to say proudly that yeah, you didn't get pissed every weekend during your uni years but you stepped up and raised a little kid in a tough situation and managed to help her grow into a good person.
    like what stuff would I miss out on? I would go uni next year even tho its a little bit later than expected. but what stuff would I miss out on do you think?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    like what stuff would I miss out on? I would go uni next year even tho its a little bit later than expected. but what stuff would I miss out on do you think?
    it's just going to be harder to go out with friends, go drinking at night, join sports clubs etc if you have to find a sitter/pay for a sitter for your sister every time

    tbh I don't think missing out on a few nights out is a big deal but some might
 
 
 
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