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    Me and my friend live VERY different lives and that is ok. But today she called me a prude as a joke and I wanted to know your opinion. She basically asked why I wasn't like her.

    This is my message response copied and pasted:

    Hearing about people having sex with more than a couple of people at this age pure makes me feel sick. I'd be so embarrassed to state that I had slept with that many people. Yet it is the norm. I've never caught anything and always use a condom because I don't want to catch anything and the pill doesn't prevent things like that- I am fully aware people sleep around with anybody and everybody these days and I will not participate.

    Whether you like it or not, having sex with most men has the potential to get you pregnant- If you wouldn't have a child with him, you shouldn't have sex with him because contraceptive aren't always effective and you can't just keep having a load of abortions because you can't be bothered taking responsibility for your choice to have sex. Abortion should be legal because of certain situations, but that doesn't mean you should be lazy and not use anything because abortion is an option.

    Yes your consent is your choice but you can't escape science. You can't sugar coat that sex is the practice of creating a life, it's not a sport or a game. I don't want a child until I have finished my degree and have a stable job. I want stability. I actually attract really lovely men. Feminist, well educated men with great morals. I never wear anything above knee length out of personal choice and will not wear a blouse without a vest underneath. I wouldn't be caught dead in a bikini or bralet etc.

    You have a right to live how you want, as do I.

    After reading my own reply I felt weird because she gets treat a certain way because she looks and acts a certain way. Even though it is her right to say yes, her rights won't improve how men treat her. So as feminist as I am confused, in my opinion a woman's right to say yes is always going to drag her down. I'm not saying that to be judgmental.
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    Lots of people have a similar opinion to yours, you are just more mature
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    it's not a sport or a game.
    It can be.

    And **** those labels like "slut" and "prude". Why does it matter?
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    u do u, she do she. it's all cool as long as everybody is happy n safe.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me and my friend live VERY different lives and that is ok. But today she called me a prude as a joke and I wanted to know your opinion. She basically asked why I wasn't like her.

    This is my message response copied and pasted:

    Hearing about people having sex with more than a couple of people at this age pure makes me feel sick. I'd be so embarrassed to state that I had slept with that many people. Yet it is the norm. I've never caught anything and always use a condom because I don't want to catch anything and the pill doesn't prevent things like that- I am fully aware people sleep around with anybody and everybody these days and I will not participate.

    Whether you like it or not, having sex with most men has the potential to get you pregnant- If you wouldn't have a child with him, you shouldn't have sex with him because contraceptive aren't always effective and you can't just keep having a load of abortions because you can't be bothered taking responsibility for your choice to have sex. Abortion should be legal because of certain situations, but that doesn't mean you should be lazy and not use anything because abortion is an option.

    Yes your consent is your choice but you can't escape science. You can't sugar coat that sex is the practice of creating a life, it's not a sport or a game. I don't want a child until I have finished my degree and have a stable job. I want stability. I actually attract really lovely men. Feminist, well educated men with great morals. I never wear anything above knee length out of personal choice and will not wear a blouse without a vest underneath. I wouldn't be caught dead in a bikini or bralet etc.

    You have a right to live how you want, as do I.

    After reading my own reply I felt weird because she gets treat a certain way because she looks and acts a certain way. Even though it is her right to say yes, her rights won't improve how men treat her. So as feminist as I am confused, in my opinion a woman's right to say yes is always going to drag her down. I'm not saying that to be judgmental.
    You seem to be linking sex with solely having a child, whilst this true, sex is also used for pleasure. People can and do have sex without the intention of getting pregnant via the use of condoms, the pill etc, which protects against pregnancy ~99% of the time.

    I imagine you kind of hurt your friend's feelings by saying you would feel embarrassed if you were talking about guys you had slept with.
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    [QUOTE=Cubone-r;72899012]

    via the use of condoms, the pill etc, which protects against pregnancy ~99% of the time.


    She asked why she kept catching std's- I said it was because the pill didn't protect against them.

    She shouldn't keep having sex for pleasure with any random idiot and expect him to want to settle down and marry her, she should date him first.

    She shouldn't keep having sex without the pill, get pregnant and keep aborting them. It's stupid beyond belief. She only uses the pill when she can be bothered. If she's off out and not 'expecting' to have sex, she doesn't take it and doesn't use anything. It's not safe.

    Of course people have sex for pleasure. But she can't do that without protection and complain about std's and pregnancy. She can't have the best of both worlds is what i'm trying to tell her. If you don't use protection you may get pregnant. It shouldn't be with someone she's known all of half an hour. If it is, she needs to stop complaining about that and the fact that men call her a town bike. I can't fix these issues for her.

    I'm not trying to be cruel but she's not thick, she knows how to fix these issues so why ask me? Do you get me?
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    I think it is a bit prudish. Everyone is entitled to living the way they wish of course, but I think it's a mistake to say the 'point' of sex is to have a child. It wasn't designed by anyone with that purpose, it's just a random mechanism we've been lumped with. It's like saying 'the point of rain is to make rivers flow', but rain is just rain - it's just a random mechanism that we can use however we like.

    In this case, sex is enjoyed by many people, so as long as they're careful there is no problem in my opinion. You're free to think sleeping with multiple partners would be embarrassing, but in my opinion I think you should ask yourself why you find it embarrassing. If you have no interest in it then that's totally fair enough and I wouldn't say it was prudish, but saying it's embarrassing and supposed to be for having children is in my opinion a prudish way of thinking.
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    If you genuinely were a feminist, as you proclaim, you'd let your friend do what she likes with her own body and her own life and not judge her for it
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    (Original post by SuperHuman98)
    Lots of people have a similar opinion to yours, you are just more mature
    Lots of *****

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    • #1
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    (Original post by miser)
    I think it is a bit prudish. Everyone is entitled to living the way they wish of course, but I think it's a mistake to say the 'point' of sex is to have a child. It wasn't designed by anyone with that purpose, it's just a random mechanism we've been lumped with. It's like saying 'the point of rain is to make rivers flow', but rain is just rain - it's just a random mechanism that we can use however we like.

    In this case, sex is enjoyed by many people, so as long as they're careful there is no problem in my opinion. You're free to think sleeping with multiple partners would be embarrassing, but in my opinion I think you should ask yourself why you find it embarrassing. If you have no interest in it then that's totally fair enough and I wouldn't say it was prudish, but saying it's embarrassing and supposed to be for having children is in my opinion a prudish way of thinking.
    No it's not that. She asked why she kept getting pregnant and I said because you keep having unprotected sex. Sex can result in a child. I didn't know how else to word it...
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    (Original post by bones-mccoy)
    If you genuinely were a feminist, as you proclaim, you'd let your friend do what she likes with her own body and her own life and not judge her for it
    She asked me why men use her for sex and why men don't respect her.
    What would your reply to her be?
    As I said, her right to say yes is her right. But I can't help but feel her saying yes to anyone is the cause of her problems. People don't agree with her constantly getting pregnant and aborting because having 'fun' is more important that her using protection.

    Is there a nice way of saying it?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    No it's not that. She asked why she kept getting pregnant and I said because you keep having unprotected sex. Sex can result in a child. I didn't know how else to word it...
    Well, if that's all it is then it's not prudish to state facts.
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    (Original post by miser)
    Well, if that's all it is then it's not prudish to state facts.
    I'm so bad with my wording, I must sound a right *****....She's my friend I'm trying to help her...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She asked me why men use her for sex and why men don't respect her.
    What would your reply to her be?
    As I said, her right to say yes is her right. But I can't help but feel her saying yes to anyone is the cause of her problems. People don't agree with her constantly getting pregnant and aborting because having 'fun' is more important that her using protection.

    Is there a nice way of saying it?
    I don't agree with her getting pregnant and then aborting it, that's terribly irresponsible and it's honestly not that hard to use a condom or take the pill properly. I personally don't judge others for being promiscuous and sleeping around but sadly, a lot of people will. There's only so much you can say to her - it's down to her to sort her own life out and start acting responsibly. Unfortunately it may take something horrendous for her to realise.
 
 
 
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