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My mental health has ruined my life but I don't want to be seen as an attention seek

I am 16 years old, and I have severe depression with symptoms of anxiety and psychosis. I have been diagnosed and I'm with CAMHS and a counsellor, but my mental health has wreaked havoc on my life and I don't know what to do. As of late - a year after being diagnosed - I am living out of a backpack, my family hates me and I hate them, I have no friends, I have gone from being a straight A student to failing most of my GCSEs and I want to kill myself. I'm in-between meds, this will be my third SSRI I've tried. I have just started working at a job I hate; I'm three weeks in and already considering quitting.
I know it will get better, it already has in a way, but I just don't know how to move on with my life. What if I fail all my GCSEs and can't get into college?? Or my parents finally tell me to leave and never come back? I am alive only for my partner and even he's getting sick of my ********. Someone please help.
Do you go to your counsellor? Imho it is not realistic to do exams in your current mental state; the root problem here to be solved is your mental illness / instability. Once you solve that, everything will fall right back into its right place. Once you solve your mental health,

- your boyfriend will stop getting sick of your "***..." (as you say, but I doubt he is actually getting sick or you, I reckon he really wants to hell you)
- you will be able to think clearly and get back in track to straight As next year (it is most definitely possible to go from straight Us to straight As in 6 months you just have to work really hard... Try finding a good spot in a library to work)
- I'm assuming your family hate you because of your mental state? This will solve that problem and too, so you can move back in and have stable accommodation.
- People will be more likely to approach you, and you will be more likely to be able to fluently talk to them, so you will make more friends.

Sorted!

Note that I've just told you to fix your mental health problems, but I can't tell you how because I'm not an expert. Your councillor should help with that. Also, if you can, quit your job and focus mostly on your studies. Of course only quit your job if it is financially viable. Also most schools offer pastoral care because they are in loco parentis while you are in school so try seeing if they can help you.

Good luck! The future can only get better, and you have a very busy year ahead of you - that's good, it'll distract you and keep you focused!

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Getting a job might be frustrating, but its a good way to keep a fixed schedule so that you can continue moving forward. I don't know your circumstances, but if your job isn't motivating you to work hard, it would be best to start looking for a new one.

Its hard to not think about other people and how they feel, but you should be a little more selfish and put yourself first. I'm sure your partner isn't tired of you, and as someone who cares about you I'm sure he wants to see you get better, so please rely more on the people you trust. If you ever feel like you can't talk to them, there are people here that want to help, and my PM's are open.
What job is it?

Continue seeking help but try and find out what you enjoy in life, although it may be hard, and find a job based off of that
Reply 4
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Anonymous #1
OP
The problem is it's not my mental health that's causing my parents to hate me, people to not like me etc. It's those factors making my mental health worse. My friends all left me, people have a tendency to hate me for no reason, and my parents are abusive. I've done my exams now which is why I got a job.
Thank you very much prazzyjazzy, I appreciate the kind words.
Also I work at McDonald's and they give me stupid hours.
You can always do you GCSE'S later on, your health is much more important right now so focus on that
Reply 6
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Anonymous #1
OP
I've already done my GCSEs
You need to speak to a GP, a counsellor or even a teacher. Going into therapy will really help you. As for you saying you're only living for your partner, don't. I know it's easier said than done, but you need to put yourself into a position where you are living for yourself and ONLY yourself. Because if things ended with your partner, you'll probably put yourself into a worse state.

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