Worried being Ugly will lead to being alone
17, male and i'm pretty darn unattractive. And when I say that I'm not attractive I'm not an insecure average / good looking person saying that (would you believe), I'm a 100% genuine ugo.
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
Original post by Anonymous
17, male and i'm pretty darn unattractive. And when I say that I'm not attractive I'm not an insecure average / good looking person saying that (would you believe), I'm a 100% genuine ugo.
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
Same age and in the same situation, but I've had my whole life to deal with this and these are how I cope with my outright ugliness and fears of growing old alone:
- Once I accepted that I am not and never will be as beautiful as girls on IG or the 5'5 50kg girls in my year, I just began seeing myself as an actual individual and pretty unique.
- I focus on other things than looks like toning my body, eating well so I'm mentally as good as I can be, learning languages bc I'm good at that
- Finding out what I enjoy in life and just doing that
- Also, I'm living my life now knowing people will always think I'm an ugly mf so I might as well do what I want?? Like I used to hide away in my room in my early teens and cry and cry and isolate myself in fear of people looking at me, but now I know they probably will I just do whateber I want. It's once you accept you are who you are, that's when things change.
Thanks to issues with being picked on in school, I get you with the anxiety and talking to the opposite sex. For me, whenever a guy talks to me in a pub/party/anywhere, I immediately get defensive and assume its a dare/for sympathy/as a joke, and I'm just emotionless at them and more or less tell them to f off bc I'm petrified of being a 'joke' as I was when I was younger before I lost my weight. I really want to find someone at uni too, but I just need to get over this and stop being so awkward around guys bc I have NO IDEA how to talk to them (even though I went to a mixed school)
So far, I've been faking it until I make it and with baby steps thats worked! I went to a pretty big (popular person smh hate that term) party and wore pretty revealing clothes I wouldn't usually wear, but I pretended I was this confident attractive girl and the night was fab. I'll do that at uni deffo, and just see how that works with guys too.
Also, one thing I personally know from who I find attractive is that looks are really not the be all end all. I've had crushes on pretty ugly people, just because we've spoken loads and I've realised they're such genuine kind people. Only takes a spark to light a flame pal
Okay sorry for the paragraph. This is from a fellow unattractive person, so this is all the truth- just get to know yourself as a person and focus on that! PM me if you need any other help bc I know how dark this road can get
#relatable
I also never had a problem until recently because I went to a boys school but sixth was mixed and well, everyone seems to be hooking up but me. I’m not too harsh on myself, I have days where I look alright and I have about 4 things I’d love to change and I’d be completely happy... I also get bad social anxiety but I somewhat enjoy the thrill of feeling so anxious and horrified because I guess I have a decent personality which makes it easier to communicate.
Have you identified what you want to don’t like? Weight? Facial features? Scars? Bad haircut?
Personally I think anyone in good clothes, good shape, a nice haircut, good skin and good hygiene can be attractive
I also never had a problem until recently because I went to a boys school but sixth was mixed and well, everyone seems to be hooking up but me. I’m not too harsh on myself, I have days where I look alright and I have about 4 things I’d love to change and I’d be completely happy... I also get bad social anxiety but I somewhat enjoy the thrill of feeling so anxious and horrified because I guess I have a decent personality which makes it easier to communicate.
Have you identified what you want to don’t like? Weight? Facial features? Scars? Bad haircut?
Personally I think anyone in good clothes, good shape, a nice haircut, good skin and good hygiene can be attractive
The most unattractive thing is people who don't like themselves.
Some of the guys that I dated when I was younger wouldn't have won a beauty pageant but were hot and fun people to be around. We had shared interests, went fun places etc.
One of the worst things was when a stranger took a sneak pic of my ex on public transport and then it went semi-viral. I felt so awful because they'd just taken a really bad pic of him and he was just the NICEST most sexy person in real life.
He shrugged it off and it's now become something we all poke fun at when it (inevitably) does the rounds... but yeah- even if your looks aren't your strongest point it is really no big deal. Come to terms with yourself and enjoy being you.
Some of the guys that I dated when I was younger wouldn't have won a beauty pageant but were hot and fun people to be around. We had shared interests, went fun places etc.
One of the worst things was when a stranger took a sneak pic of my ex on public transport and then it went semi-viral. I felt so awful because they'd just taken a really bad pic of him and he was just the NICEST most sexy person in real life.
He shrugged it off and it's now become something we all poke fun at when it (inevitably) does the rounds... but yeah- even if your looks aren't your strongest point it is really no big deal. Come to terms with yourself and enjoy being you.
Original post by Friffinghell
The most unattractive thing is people who don't like themselves.
Some of the guys that I dated when I was younger wouldn't have won a beauty pageant but were hot and fun people to be around. We had shared interests, went fun places etc.
One of the worst things was when a stranger took a sneak pic of my ex on public transport and then it went semi-viral. I felt so awful because they'd just taken a really bad pic of him and he was just the NICEST most sexy person in real life.
He shrugged it off and it's now become something we all poke fun at when it (inevitably) does the rounds... but yeah- even if your looks aren't your strongest point it is really no big deal. Come to terms with yourself and enjoy being you.
Some of the guys that I dated when I was younger wouldn't have won a beauty pageant but were hot and fun people to be around. We had shared interests, went fun places etc.
One of the worst things was when a stranger took a sneak pic of my ex on public transport and then it went semi-viral. I felt so awful because they'd just taken a really bad pic of him and he was just the NICEST most sexy person in real life.
He shrugged it off and it's now become something we all poke fun at when it (inevitably) does the rounds... but yeah- even if your looks aren't your strongest point it is really no big deal. Come to terms with yourself and enjoy being you.
I agree with this. When I was 17 I was a fat f*ck, all I did was eat, sleep and video games. I never got any attention from girls nor did I care as I was only into games. Fast forward 4 years and now I am pretty fit, I get attention from all sorts of women (older ones, my age ones).
Your young and as your a guy you probably still have a bit of puberty left before you fully mature.
Your should consider changing your style for uni, so get a new hairstyle, get rid of patchy facial hair, wear well fitted clothes and so on, it'll boost your confidence and self image.
BTW I doubt your ugly.
Original post by Anonymous
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
Dress well
Groom well - including cleaning your skin and all that ****
Work out/Lift weights
Maybe grow out your hair and try out different styles
Maybe grow a beard
Realize generally people of similar levels of attractiveness attract each other
Personality does matter - work on it
and finally... meditate/ find hobbies to take your mind off it.
Original post by Anonymous
17, male and i'm pretty darn unattractive. And when I say that I'm not attractive I'm not an insecure average / good looking person saying that (would you believe), I'm a 100% genuine ugo.
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
the older you get, the less looks matter. at the end of the day, you're going to have to spend every day with your future partner and support them and raise a family with them. those are important traits to look for. you need to learn to own your personality. you can't make yourself beautiful, but you can let your personality shine through.
There's no such thing as ugly beauty. We are all unique and beautiful in our own way. You should seek out some counselling to help change your current way of feeling, it will only serve to hurt your confidence which is the major stumbling block when it comes to gaining any type of relationship with people.
I'm speaking from experience of feeling that way about myself before. I still occasionally compare myself to others, but I'm in a happy relationship with someone I love. Do I sometimes wonder how I ended up with someone like her. Of course I do. But I've seen myself in a better light because of her.
It will happen for you. In time.
I'm speaking from experience of feeling that way about myself before. I still occasionally compare myself to others, but I'm in a happy relationship with someone I love. Do I sometimes wonder how I ended up with someone like her. Of course I do. But I've seen myself in a better light because of her.
It will happen for you. In time.
Original post by Anonymous
17, male and i'm pretty darn unattractive. And when I say that I'm not attractive I'm not an insecure average / good looking person saying that (would you believe), I'm a 100% genuine ugo.
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
In general, saying you're unattractive is completely untrue. Have confidence in the way you look, i'm pretty sure someone out there would find you attractive. Whether that deals with your physical appearance or your character is up to them.
Stop comparing yourself to others, stop the wishful thinking and stop the self pity.
Go out and have fun. Seek adventure, experience lots of new things, get outside your comfort zone.
Lack of confidence is holding you back, nothing else. So you have to force yourself to do things that will develop your confidence and stick with it.
Take control and don't let that anxiety control and destroy you. No-one else but you can do that.
Confidence is attractive, not looks. People in wheelchairs and with all sorts of disabilities manage to get married and have a family. Keep this in perspective.
Go out and have fun. Seek adventure, experience lots of new things, get outside your comfort zone.
Lack of confidence is holding you back, nothing else. So you have to force yourself to do things that will develop your confidence and stick with it.
Take control and don't let that anxiety control and destroy you. No-one else but you can do that.
Confidence is attractive, not looks. People in wheelchairs and with all sorts of disabilities manage to get married and have a family. Keep this in perspective.
(edited 6 years ago)
Work on the confidence, perhaps see a counselor about the anxiety. I find if you find a counselor you hit it off with they can really give support and challenge that help. In my experience a man was best, possibly they can understand male insecurity better. Uni will have a service which is tailored to young people's needs too. As to ugly, to be honest I think unless people are in the minority attractive set dating is hard work whatever. So you're doing the right things, with hair, clothes etc. And never brand yourself ugly. Look around, thing work out OK for people, the drive to find a partner is strong and with effort you get there.
We all have our imperfections. Looks do matter but only to an extent, most girls don't expect you to look like Thor, just that you're keeping yourself healthy and that you're confident enough to look after yourself. There are several ways to improve your health and appearance that boost your looks.
Just some of the things that will help boost your confidence which is the most important factor.
•
Work out
•
Dress well, buy new clothes if it needs to be
•
Get a new haircut
Just some of the things that will help boost your confidence which is the most important factor.
Original post by Anonymous
17, male and i'm pretty darn unattractive. And when I say that I'm not attractive I'm not an insecure average / good looking person saying that (would you believe), I'm a 100% genuine ugo.
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
But that's never bothered me (except now), I accepted from an early stage I can't change the features I was born with so I excerise and try to dress well to make up for it and I didn't really give a **** till recently.
But as I'm going to uni soon I've really started to get really worried. I'd love to get into a relationship at uni and hopefully get married and have a family in later life. I've got the personality of a brick and I have really bad anxiety problems and actually cannot approach girls or even talk to them AT ALL.
Im really getting worried about this.So much so I'm taking 100s of pics of myself a day hoping I may look better. It's really starting to bother me. Genuinely feel like crying. I get that in the end it's more then looks that will make a lasting relationship, but how am I going to get a foot in the door or make a first impression?
How can I come to peace with my unattractiveness?
I felt the same but I'm always getting guys so I know I'm not ugly
look u will not be lonely. i'm quite ''lonely'' but i choose to be i think society is crazy and i shouldn't be a part of it. i find my company in books Netflix food sport and the 5-6 friends i have. don't worry about needing loads of friends its the friends that are true that u need and sometime u only have 1-3. i don't think anyone is ugly really - its the personality that makes people ugly (aka **** head ex boyf) however if u are 'ugly' in societies eyes then u will know who your true friends are cause they don't have a 'physical' reason to fake it. i wouldn't worry about trying to dress smart and fixing yourself just be you and do what you want. i know all this **** is optimistic and i'm not optimistic in anyway but only to people who stand out from society deserve my thoughts (aka you!). if people judge you for your looks then they are just typical and typical people are not people you should be mates with - 90% of the population. i find 99% of my company in music. id try it if i were you as a hobby. xx
PM me we can talk about this there
Original post by dreamerEU
money and/or plastic surgery with said money
Best do both
Best do both
truth, i am just saving up for plastic surgery to cure my abomination of a face, might take a long time to save up enough money but it is my only goal right now
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