I need help! Watch

tyronemarsh
Badges: 10
Rep:
?
#1
Report Thread starter 1 year ago
#1
I am currently writing a metaphorical novella about a young man who grew up with a bad childhood and lives a stereotypical life with indelible experiences.

This is the first chapter:


It was more than a crash – it was a message.

Storms brewed on the ice horizon promising nothing but winds to obliterate trees from the soil that rested below me. The land was covered with layers of humidity and screamed in pain when rain fell like guns of fire at war, obliterating every leaf, every wretched rose that grew from the blood of their enemies. The wind howled like a wolf during a full moon and excoriated what was beautiful into something much darker. Clouds above me grew and lurched towards every footstep I took deeper into the abyss, where fog suddenly settled, and where a simple crash changed my imperfect life, existence, and purpose.

I could remember the tendons in my hand shivering up to the very sight of it. One would hope that sunshine and warmth would repair and rebuild the mayhem and havoc the storm left on the beloved earth. A couple of blind steps resulted in something life changing yet extravagant. Life can be brought through death - So, I died, or so I thought…

After I looked deep into the eyes of the devil I decided to escape and run far, far away, distant to all of my worries.

When I was a child my grandmother whispered into my ear: “one day I will see you fly like sheep in the night sky,” and ever since then, I flew with the stars.

Like every iconic love story, I broke up with the woman of my nightmares, her name was Mara. She was perfect.

I and Mara were invited to this spectacular party that was deemed to be the best night of my life. It ended up being the worst. Everything was perfect at the start, though. I remembered walking on the road which was black as charcoal, locked into her cosy hand, and looking beyond the stars that floated above us. The party was situated on the outskirts of the imperfect city, where only the darkest of beings would go. Unfortunately, I fell into that trap. I will not remain restrained again.

The party was in a house that stood alone in the middle of a field. Nothing surrounded the house, not even the grass that was on the field that stretched to the horizon-line. There was a power, a dark power that was in the air when I entered that house. Aside from the screeching alcoholics, something much powerful tempted me into that house. It was not all of the liquor. It was the freedom that I had in that moment. I was fuelled on adrenaline and excitement the moment my feet entered that house. Never in my life, I would have thought that Hell felt like Heaven. Never in my life, I would have fallen deeper in love with Mara. The party was a part of my life I would never be able to experience again.

Mara was the blood in my veins. Mara was the reason I did not feel alone within this world. That, however, was until she cut my skin. Anger, pure anger, replaced adrenaline. It was too late. I ran. I ran as far as I possibly can. I ran away from a nightmare and instead ran towards a storm.

Rain fell down from the sky like bullets towards the ground below me. I remembered feeling the rain strike onto my skin and my legs burn with liberty. Everything was so green, as green as an evergreen forest. The smell of the grass below exuded an air of tranquillity and peace. The sound of crunching twigs along with the Hell above beckoned me deeper into the forest’s pulsing heart. How could I resist not running deeper? The setting was as complex and mystical as the Garden of Eden.

Fortunately, I ran blindly onto a road. The pain was the only air I breathed. The pain somewhat exhilarated my senses which lasted an eternity. Death was the only thing I desired for. Death was what aspired me to keep on living. While I lay on a blanket of worry waiting for my fate to be sealed describing every inch, every occurrence to you, I manifest power through my very fingertips. The power of a writer conspicuous; yet power itself is inconspicuous.

I aim to describe to you how my life changed. It takes more than words.



I focused on structural techniques and etc.
[This is not homework.]
If possible mind giving me advice and possible ideas?
0
reply
DrSocSciences
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#2
Report 1 year ago
#2
You're kidding?
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

How old were you when you first saw porn?

I've never seen it (6)
9.38%
Before I was 12 (30)
46.88%
13 (9)
14.06%
14 (8)
12.5%
15 (6)
9.38%
16 (3)
4.69%
17 (0)
0%
18 (1)
1.56%
Between the ages of 19 - 24 (1)
1.56%
Over 25 (0)
0%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise