12 years: from a Chinese peasant worker to a graduate student in top US college
12 years: from an unskilled Chinese peasant worker to a graduate student in top US college, I made it!
Author: lxfarmer, Translated by Sweetpoi
Have you ever had a dream? When I looked back at my mine and my 12 years' struggle to fulfill it, tears filled my eyes. I was moved by my sweat and hard work, my resilience and persistence, and above all, my stubborn determination. In fact, everyone can be moved by himself and herself, in some way. It has been a long time since I wanted to put my story down, a complete and vivid story including every bit of detail in my life. Although I am just a common man, the son of a peasant in rural China, and an ex-peasant worker, I feel like sharing my experiences with you guys. It is not a rags-to-riches novel, but a real life story of a young man who did his best and made the impossible happen.
Early days: a winding path
I was born in August, 1990, in a rural village in Henan Province, Middle China. My birth brought disaster to my family. As my parents had already had a child (my brother), giving birth to me was considered illegal due to the Chinese "family planning" policy and we incurred heavy punishment. 8 out of 12 stacks of our wheat, 2/3 of a whole year's harvest, was taken by the notorious local authority enforcing the policy. My mom said we nearly starved to death. Two years later, my younger sister was born. This time my dad was taken away by the same authority and got beaten up. Since then the 5-member family lived an impoverished but happy life -- we felt contented that at least we had enough food. Dad did some small business around the village to raise the family, and mom was always kind to us. However, she had been suffering from a type of depression since the age of 19. In most cases she was fine, but sometimes she couldn't make it out of the bed for an entire year. I can still remember vividly her sitting on the floor, weeping miserably.
My childhood was a mixture of laughter and tear. The misfortune made me a mature kid. Recalling my days in elementary school, I did an OK job. My grades in math were pretty good, but I failed to do well in Chinese (in fact, hardly able to pronounce some words in Mandarin till now...) But the problem was that I was completely unmotivated to learn, and my performance even worsened when I entered middle school. During the outbreak of SARS in 2003, the school announced a 2-month holiday in emergency, and together with my friends I spent the days fishing and catching shrimps. I dropped out of school when I was in the second year of my middle school. After several relatives told me that excavator driver earned a decent salary (300-400 USD per month at that time) in Shanghai, all I could think about was driving excavator and earning cash, after which I would afford to buy a new house and marry a decent girl......
This was exactly when my childhood came to an end. In November 2003, my dad and I went to Shanghai in a coach bus. The head teacher in my school called to ask about me, but I simply ignored him and did not even give an account of why I dropped out. Now I feel extremely regretful. How could I treat my good intentioned teacher in such a manner? The bus ride took a whole night. My heart beat faster when we approached Shanghai at dawn. Every young man longs to leave their home and sets off for an adventure, and I'm of no exception. I seldom went out of the town where I lived, and my furthest trip before was to a nearby county. But now I was in Shanghai, the largest city in the Far East! I was even excited to see the billboards and street lights--- I had seen them in TV only. We headed for a town in the suburb where my uncle owned a noodle restaurant. This would be the place where I lived when I was in Shanghai. A few days later, I set off learning to drive the excavator in a construction site with my cousin (my uncle's son). I can still remember the basic moves now. There are two handlers alongside the driver's seat to control the arm, while a push in the front of it is in charge of the back-forth movement...... But it wasn't long before my ambitious plan came to a halt. The boss (owner of the excavator) thought a young apprentice would do great harm to the machine. He told me to come the next year. Returning to my uncle's restaurant, I felt that I had never ever been so depressed. My dream was shattered. During that time, my uncle's restaurant was doing really well, and consequently there was a lot of work to do. At first I just helped out in the restaurant from time to time, but gradually I found out that I had been doing the jobs of waiter, cleaner and cashier. Working non-stop for 14 or 15 hours every day and 7 days a week was the norm. Believe it or not, I got paid approximately 40 USD per month. Since the restaurant was located in a industrial park, our customers were mainly factory workers. Chatting with them occasionally, I learned that they worked for manufacturers of electronic components of computers, and most of them did get well paid. However, I was also told that I would not be eligible for such a job, as I was under-aged, undereducated and unskilled---this depressed me further.
2004 was coming, and I did not even have a chance to visit my family during the Chinese New Year. I was left to keep the restaurant. The memory of eating the leftovers with my cousin on the eve of New Year, a time when Chinese families reunite, still makes my eyes wet. After the holiday, I hoped to recommence my apprenticeship. But my cousin had his own thoughts. At that moment the other cousin seemed to be a better candidate for the apprenticeship, as he was older and more experienced than me. Besides, I did pretty well in the restaurant and the business was taking off. My uncle could not afford to lose his best hand. Clearly, I was kept in the restaurant doing strenuous and under-paid work for selfish reasons. This experience taught me a crucial lesson: relatives do not always care about your benefits. If selfless and altruistic people do exist, then they must be your parents.
At that moment, I had joined the army of nearly 200 million peasant workers across the country. What's worse, I was a child labour and worked in a "sweat restaurant". Standing all days, I was troubled by the pain in my feet. It wasn't until later that I discovered it has led to permeant injury -- the arches of my feet went almost flat. But the physical challenge was not my big concern. The bleak prospect of doing strenuous work for decades as a peasant worker haunted me. I was supposed to earn around 40 USD dollar, and it was nothing. What's worse, I hadn't seen a penny yet. A feeling of sadness always emerged when I finished my work, but I had absolutely no idea about what to do. I had to accept this, as this was the adventurous path I had chose. Under heavy stress, I got into a bad habit-- masturbation. I masturbated every night, and sometimes twice a day, always feeling relieved doing it. This was my secret. I did not even know others were doing the same, nor did I have the slightest clue of its destructive nature.
Back to school: a turbulent journey
From time to time, I started to miss my happy old days at school, playing with my friends and learning knowledge. They were colorful days overall. How distinct they were from my days in the restaurant, doing tiring and repetitive work every day! This thought got catalyzed by some warm-hearted customers, who told me about the world outside. Most of them believed that I was too young to work and suggested that I go back to school, as pursuing higher education was the best way for a Chinese to improve his or her social-economic status! But that wasn't such an easy thing for me. In the 2004 summer, my sister came to work at the same restaurant. Despaired of the my life in the restaurant and profoundly worried about the future of myself, my sister, and my family, I set up my mind. I called my mom in a booth and told her about my days. " I wanna return to my school and resume my study!" I sobbed. "Come back to us if you wish." Both of us started to cry out aloud. My eyes even got wet when I was typing this line. Mom, you are always there for me. Thank you, and I love you! Mom was literally the only person who supported my decision. All of my relatives in Shanghai protested angrily and said that I was just acting immaturely to avoid the hard work and responsibility. "Are you aiming for the Tsinghua or Peking University?" My cousin said ironically. They promised that I could start to learn excavator the next month. But I declined. Of course my chance of getting into a top college was slim, and there was no promise that my family would become better off if I continue my study. At the age of 14 and out of instinct, I felt that I should put a stop to my working life. My relatives phoned my mom and lobbied her. She bursted into tears, but stood steadfast. That night, both of us were crying. My dad didn't say a word, but I could tell that he was tempted by the option of me becoming an excavator driver.
Three days later I heard a shocking news: dad got sick. He had been transferred from the local clinic to a hospital in the capital of county, and once again to Henan Cancer Hospital. He was diagnosed with malignant lymphoma! My sister and I started to cry, for an entire day. Dad was literally the only bread winner in my family, as mom had been ill for long. My family might collapse, not to mention me going back to school. "Could my disease get cured?" My dad asked the doctor. "Money first." But the thing was that my family could only afford around 600 USD, far from enough. The responsibility fell on my mom. Touring around to borrow money, she was declined by most of our friends and relatives-- everyone knew that the risk was high. Some of them agreed, but offered a mere several hundred RMB ( less than 100 USD). It was hard to describe how humiliating it was. Finally, my aunt and uncle in Shanghai agreed to lend us the rest of the money needed. Radiation therapy seemed to work for my dad, and his health situation stabilized. When the summer holiday was over, my sister went back, but I did not feel like pressing for returning to school anymore. My family was in a crisis, and as a man I had to shoulder my responsibility instead of putting further burden on my mom. All I wished was that my dad got better. Several months later, a series of radiation therapy had killed the tumor cells, but my dad almost went bold. What's worse, he could hardly engage in any heavy labour ever since-- almost lethal for a peasant, while the family was heavy in debt, owing around 7000 USD.
I continued my work for months. During the Chinese New Year in 2005, I finally started to pack up. I was supposed to work as a farm hand while taking care of my parents and sister back home. 13 months' hard labour for 500 USD. What's worse, I ended up getting nothing, as my uncle was my family's debtor and my 500USD was automatically used to repay the debt. Thus, leaving my hometown with little cash a year ago, I had to go back home after my adventure, still penniless. But I still couldn't let go my dream of returning to school, and I remember buying a book named "learning to use computer from scratch" on my way back. I was getting close to my home. In the market I bought a box of apples, my mom's favorite. It was 5 days before the Chinese New Year when I finally got back home, holding my luggage and a big box of apples. Mom and dad was in the kitchen, preparing fried food for the New Year's Eve in high spirits. The pleasure of family reunion was hard to describe ......
And there was another good news waiting for me at home: the government had started to pay a big subsidy to middle school students, and it would take very little to go to school! A fantastic opportunity for me! The Chinese government is really able to make or break a person! Exhilarated, I told my parents that I really want to restart my middle school and got approved. Therefore, 8 days after 2005 Chinese New Year, I sat in the classroom, once again. But the only problem was that I was a freshmen, while my friends were in Year 3.
Author: lxfarmer, Translated by Sweetpoi
Have you ever had a dream? When I looked back at my mine and my 12 years' struggle to fulfill it, tears filled my eyes. I was moved by my sweat and hard work, my resilience and persistence, and above all, my stubborn determination. In fact, everyone can be moved by himself and herself, in some way. It has been a long time since I wanted to put my story down, a complete and vivid story including every bit of detail in my life. Although I am just a common man, the son of a peasant in rural China, and an ex-peasant worker, I feel like sharing my experiences with you guys. It is not a rags-to-riches novel, but a real life story of a young man who did his best and made the impossible happen.
Early days: a winding path
I was born in August, 1990, in a rural village in Henan Province, Middle China. My birth brought disaster to my family. As my parents had already had a child (my brother), giving birth to me was considered illegal due to the Chinese "family planning" policy and we incurred heavy punishment. 8 out of 12 stacks of our wheat, 2/3 of a whole year's harvest, was taken by the notorious local authority enforcing the policy. My mom said we nearly starved to death. Two years later, my younger sister was born. This time my dad was taken away by the same authority and got beaten up. Since then the 5-member family lived an impoverished but happy life -- we felt contented that at least we had enough food. Dad did some small business around the village to raise the family, and mom was always kind to us. However, she had been suffering from a type of depression since the age of 19. In most cases she was fine, but sometimes she couldn't make it out of the bed for an entire year. I can still remember vividly her sitting on the floor, weeping miserably.
My childhood was a mixture of laughter and tear. The misfortune made me a mature kid. Recalling my days in elementary school, I did an OK job. My grades in math were pretty good, but I failed to do well in Chinese (in fact, hardly able to pronounce some words in Mandarin till now...) But the problem was that I was completely unmotivated to learn, and my performance even worsened when I entered middle school. During the outbreak of SARS in 2003, the school announced a 2-month holiday in emergency, and together with my friends I spent the days fishing and catching shrimps. I dropped out of school when I was in the second year of my middle school. After several relatives told me that excavator driver earned a decent salary (300-400 USD per month at that time) in Shanghai, all I could think about was driving excavator and earning cash, after which I would afford to buy a new house and marry a decent girl......
This was exactly when my childhood came to an end. In November 2003, my dad and I went to Shanghai in a coach bus. The head teacher in my school called to ask about me, but I simply ignored him and did not even give an account of why I dropped out. Now I feel extremely regretful. How could I treat my good intentioned teacher in such a manner? The bus ride took a whole night. My heart beat faster when we approached Shanghai at dawn. Every young man longs to leave their home and sets off for an adventure, and I'm of no exception. I seldom went out of the town where I lived, and my furthest trip before was to a nearby county. But now I was in Shanghai, the largest city in the Far East! I was even excited to see the billboards and street lights--- I had seen them in TV only. We headed for a town in the suburb where my uncle owned a noodle restaurant. This would be the place where I lived when I was in Shanghai. A few days later, I set off learning to drive the excavator in a construction site with my cousin (my uncle's son). I can still remember the basic moves now. There are two handlers alongside the driver's seat to control the arm, while a push in the front of it is in charge of the back-forth movement...... But it wasn't long before my ambitious plan came to a halt. The boss (owner of the excavator) thought a young apprentice would do great harm to the machine. He told me to come the next year. Returning to my uncle's restaurant, I felt that I had never ever been so depressed. My dream was shattered. During that time, my uncle's restaurant was doing really well, and consequently there was a lot of work to do. At first I just helped out in the restaurant from time to time, but gradually I found out that I had been doing the jobs of waiter, cleaner and cashier. Working non-stop for 14 or 15 hours every day and 7 days a week was the norm. Believe it or not, I got paid approximately 40 USD per month. Since the restaurant was located in a industrial park, our customers were mainly factory workers. Chatting with them occasionally, I learned that they worked for manufacturers of electronic components of computers, and most of them did get well paid. However, I was also told that I would not be eligible for such a job, as I was under-aged, undereducated and unskilled---this depressed me further.
2004 was coming, and I did not even have a chance to visit my family during the Chinese New Year. I was left to keep the restaurant. The memory of eating the leftovers with my cousin on the eve of New Year, a time when Chinese families reunite, still makes my eyes wet. After the holiday, I hoped to recommence my apprenticeship. But my cousin had his own thoughts. At that moment the other cousin seemed to be a better candidate for the apprenticeship, as he was older and more experienced than me. Besides, I did pretty well in the restaurant and the business was taking off. My uncle could not afford to lose his best hand. Clearly, I was kept in the restaurant doing strenuous and under-paid work for selfish reasons. This experience taught me a crucial lesson: relatives do not always care about your benefits. If selfless and altruistic people do exist, then they must be your parents.
At that moment, I had joined the army of nearly 200 million peasant workers across the country. What's worse, I was a child labour and worked in a "sweat restaurant". Standing all days, I was troubled by the pain in my feet. It wasn't until later that I discovered it has led to permeant injury -- the arches of my feet went almost flat. But the physical challenge was not my big concern. The bleak prospect of doing strenuous work for decades as a peasant worker haunted me. I was supposed to earn around 40 USD dollar, and it was nothing. What's worse, I hadn't seen a penny yet. A feeling of sadness always emerged when I finished my work, but I had absolutely no idea about what to do. I had to accept this, as this was the adventurous path I had chose. Under heavy stress, I got into a bad habit-- masturbation. I masturbated every night, and sometimes twice a day, always feeling relieved doing it. This was my secret. I did not even know others were doing the same, nor did I have the slightest clue of its destructive nature.
Back to school: a turbulent journey
From time to time, I started to miss my happy old days at school, playing with my friends and learning knowledge. They were colorful days overall. How distinct they were from my days in the restaurant, doing tiring and repetitive work every day! This thought got catalyzed by some warm-hearted customers, who told me about the world outside. Most of them believed that I was too young to work and suggested that I go back to school, as pursuing higher education was the best way for a Chinese to improve his or her social-economic status! But that wasn't such an easy thing for me. In the 2004 summer, my sister came to work at the same restaurant. Despaired of the my life in the restaurant and profoundly worried about the future of myself, my sister, and my family, I set up my mind. I called my mom in a booth and told her about my days. " I wanna return to my school and resume my study!" I sobbed. "Come back to us if you wish." Both of us started to cry out aloud. My eyes even got wet when I was typing this line. Mom, you are always there for me. Thank you, and I love you! Mom was literally the only person who supported my decision. All of my relatives in Shanghai protested angrily and said that I was just acting immaturely to avoid the hard work and responsibility. "Are you aiming for the Tsinghua or Peking University?" My cousin said ironically. They promised that I could start to learn excavator the next month. But I declined. Of course my chance of getting into a top college was slim, and there was no promise that my family would become better off if I continue my study. At the age of 14 and out of instinct, I felt that I should put a stop to my working life. My relatives phoned my mom and lobbied her. She bursted into tears, but stood steadfast. That night, both of us were crying. My dad didn't say a word, but I could tell that he was tempted by the option of me becoming an excavator driver.
Three days later I heard a shocking news: dad got sick. He had been transferred from the local clinic to a hospital in the capital of county, and once again to Henan Cancer Hospital. He was diagnosed with malignant lymphoma! My sister and I started to cry, for an entire day. Dad was literally the only bread winner in my family, as mom had been ill for long. My family might collapse, not to mention me going back to school. "Could my disease get cured?" My dad asked the doctor. "Money first." But the thing was that my family could only afford around 600 USD, far from enough. The responsibility fell on my mom. Touring around to borrow money, she was declined by most of our friends and relatives-- everyone knew that the risk was high. Some of them agreed, but offered a mere several hundred RMB ( less than 100 USD). It was hard to describe how humiliating it was. Finally, my aunt and uncle in Shanghai agreed to lend us the rest of the money needed. Radiation therapy seemed to work for my dad, and his health situation stabilized. When the summer holiday was over, my sister went back, but I did not feel like pressing for returning to school anymore. My family was in a crisis, and as a man I had to shoulder my responsibility instead of putting further burden on my mom. All I wished was that my dad got better. Several months later, a series of radiation therapy had killed the tumor cells, but my dad almost went bold. What's worse, he could hardly engage in any heavy labour ever since-- almost lethal for a peasant, while the family was heavy in debt, owing around 7000 USD.
I continued my work for months. During the Chinese New Year in 2005, I finally started to pack up. I was supposed to work as a farm hand while taking care of my parents and sister back home. 13 months' hard labour for 500 USD. What's worse, I ended up getting nothing, as my uncle was my family's debtor and my 500USD was automatically used to repay the debt. Thus, leaving my hometown with little cash a year ago, I had to go back home after my adventure, still penniless. But I still couldn't let go my dream of returning to school, and I remember buying a book named "learning to use computer from scratch" on my way back. I was getting close to my home. In the market I bought a box of apples, my mom's favorite. It was 5 days before the Chinese New Year when I finally got back home, holding my luggage and a big box of apples. Mom and dad was in the kitchen, preparing fried food for the New Year's Eve in high spirits. The pleasure of family reunion was hard to describe ......
And there was another good news waiting for me at home: the government had started to pay a big subsidy to middle school students, and it would take very little to go to school! A fantastic opportunity for me! The Chinese government is really able to make or break a person! Exhilarated, I told my parents that I really want to restart my middle school and got approved. Therefore, 8 days after 2005 Chinese New Year, I sat in the classroom, once again. But the only problem was that I was a freshmen, while my friends were in Year 3.
(edited 6 years ago)
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