The Student Room Group

Does my single status mean I'm not good looking (be honest)?

Alright. I'm not going to post a photo because I'd rather remain confidential. I am in my early twenties and have never been in a relationship. The guys that have asked me out I did not find attractive or intellectually appealing.

However, the guys I do find attractive, either only look at me and when I look at them, they turn away. ONLY ONE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE CALLED ME CUTE. But most of the time, I feel it is simply due to lack of interest. I've been on online dating sites and been on a few dates (more bad than good. I don't even call it dates, more of a meet-up).

People tell me I'm attractive, men and women. But I feel if I really was attractive, I would have a boyfriend/have guys lined up to actually want to date me (that seems to be the reality of "attractive" people).

So we all know that beautiful girl or stud of a guy. They are usually always taken.

The fact that I am usually (always) single, does that mean that I am really not attractive?
Reply 1
Probably, unless you give off don't talk to me vibes
Most likely.. but that only a picture could tell. It might have to do with your personality as well.. perhaps you dont really get along very well with guys and consequently they dont feel comfortable enough to ask you out. and even if you re not very attractive but average you would nonetheless get yourself in a lot of dates. Unless you were ugly, in that case guys would even come close to you let alone wanting to date you. I know for a fact guys dont mind going out with average girls. we are sexual human beings and willing to **** almost every girl we see
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Alright. I'm not going to post a photo because I'd rather remain confidential. I am in my early twenties and have never been in a relationship. The guys that have asked me out I did not find attractive or intellectually appealing.

However, the guys I do find attractive, either only look at me and when I look at them, they turn away. ONLY ONE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE CALLED ME CUTE. But most of the time, I feel it is simply due to lack of interest. I've been on online dating sites and been on a few dates (more bad than good. I don't even call it dates, more of a meet-up).

People tell me I'm attractive, men and women. But I feel if I really was attractive, I would have a boyfriend/have guys lined up to actually want to date me (that seems to be the reality of "attractive" people).

So we all know that beautiful girl or stud of a guy. They are usually always taken.

The fact that I am usually (always) single, does that mean that I am really not attractive?


I've pretty much always been taken and I wouldn't say I'm a stud of a guy.

If you like someone, let them know.
I can already tell you got a resting b*tch face so that's probly why tbh
oh for crying out loud, do you think you're the only single person on the planet or something? a lot of hot people are still single too
Original post by Anonymous
I am in my early twenties and have never been in a relationship. The guys that have asked me out I did not find attractive or intellectually appealing.


Well surely if you're turning these guys down due to not being interested, it means that you're single by choice :P If you really wanted to be in a relationship, you could've said yes to these guys.
Reply 7
they're just not that into you...
I don't think being single means that that you are not attractive
Original post by Anonymous
Alright. I'm not going to post a photo because I'd rather remain confidential. I am in my early twenties and have never been in a relationship. The guys that have asked me out I did not find attractive or intellectually appealing.

However, the guys I do find attractive, either only look at me and when I look at them, they turn away. ONLY ONE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE CALLED ME CUTE. But most of the time, I feel it is simply due to lack of interest. I've been on online dating sites and been on a few dates (more bad than good. I don't even call it dates, more of a meet-up).

People tell me I'm attractive, men and women. But I feel if I really was attractive, I would have a boyfriend/have guys lined up to actually want to date me (that seems to be the reality of "attractive" people).

So we all know that beautiful girl or stud of a guy. They are usually always taken.

The fact that I am usually (always) single, does that mean that I am really not attractive?


You need to put in some effort if you want to catch a bf.

There's only so much a guy can do. If you just stare at them and not do anything they might get the wrong idea and feel intimidated or you might come off unapproachable.

Take some initiative instead of just waiting around.
I am in the same predicament !
I have tried several online dating platforms and they all have sucked!. So I thought I would try the tinder, even though it is a "hook up" app. I have genuinely met some nice men *cough*.

I met a nice guy and we had hanged out a few times, etc. However, last week he told me he didn't wanna see me again as I had a *****y personality, played games, and was a user!. Yet, this felt more a verbal tirade as he assumed and commented I lead him on in the false hope of sex that day!

I was no doubt pretty upset. However, I took away from it something super important! A lesson in self refection/ Evaluation.

1. I do play games: I play them to see if a man is genuinely interesting in knowing me, rather than my body. However, I know for a fact I am rather emotionally unavailable at times. I have wall up to protect myself, and most men I have ever dated , etc call it "daddy issues"
2. In regards to the *****y personality statement .. Could this be in regards to playing games? I know for a fact when I am emotionally unavailable, men have commented me on being heartless, selfish,etc.
3. As for being called a user! I can see where this would come into play, as only seeing them when I was available,etc

I found a wonderful article "why you attract who you attract" http://www.huffingtonpost.com/margaret-paul-phd/relationship-advice_b_1516235.html
I suggest you read it, as it gave me more to self reflect upon

1. The men I attract are also emotionally unavailable. I cant expect something serious when they are too like me...
2. Again I have noticed the men I attract also play games, when I need them they aren't available, expect sex for favors,etc. So then I notice I will play the game harder and It is a vicious cycle
3. Again the whole user thing is the same^^

So that brought me to my next conclusion.. If I want to attract the right men into my life, I need to actively make some very big proactive changes within myself. My appearance has nothing to do with attracting partner! .. I

This might not be your problem .. However, I honestly suggest you read the article and do your own self evaluation!

Best Wishes :banana:
Reply 11
You could lower your standards a bit? Don't rely too heavily on online dating and meet people outside of the internet.

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