Family issues :/

I don't know how to say this but I just really REALLY HATE MY DAD.

My dad's the worst father in the world. He's ignorant, prideful,has a napolean complex, unreliable and self-centered. But the worst part is, he ****ING CHEATED ON MY MOM. Several times. Since I was 8 years old until now (Im 16 btw). My whole family (mom, me and older sister) found out about this fact when he left his computer screen on without logging out and we saw him send disqusting messages to online sex-buddies. He's so ****ing disqusting that he even pretended to be on business trips just to have sex with other women outside the country.

But thats not the only reason I hate him. He is such an irresponsible, lazy slob. He got fired from 3 jobs because he couldnt prioritise his time properly. He is obsessed with football and volunteered to be a football coach for the national team (the country Im in btw is really small and Im not even a citizen here, my mother just works here so my family just lives here). Because of his stupid obsession, he always took extra holidays - even in advance - just to go coach football to some kids. My sister and I even had to wait for hourss for him to pick us up from school because of his coaching. Cos of that, he got fired from every job he had (he was a HR manager btw) and he even blamed my sister and me for being fired cos he had to pick us up during working hours. What a dickass amiright?? Like umm no. Thats NOT the reason you got ****ing fired. Now hes a full time football coach, but since we arent a citizen of this country he isnt paid for being in that position.

You might be wondering why my mom couldnt pick is up from school instead and thats because shes a full time doctor. She works hard every single day, til late at night, but she ALWAYSS manages to sit down and eat with my sister and I - even if its just for a few minutes. I love my mom to bits. In fact, I feel really sorry for her the most. She got married late cos she was busy in medical school and the one man that she "loved" turned out to be a useless hobo. Now she has to work twice as hard and twice as long cos shes the only one that could financially support the family. Plus, my sister keeps spending so much money and I could tell that it stresses my mom out but she doesnt want to hurt anyone's feelings. But what sucks is that my mom doesnt think my fathers in the wrong. She doesnt think he's a stupid *****.

During my igcse exam, I completely trashed my english and history exams. The reason for that?? Well my stupid dad made me late to the exam. Half an hour late. I specifically told him to pick me up an hour before the exams. But guess what? He had football training. So he would rather stay in that ****ing field than send his daughter to sit her FINAL AND REAL IGCSE EXAM. I got a B for english language and Cs for History and eng lit. Mind you I was predicted A*s for ALL THREE OF THEM. My 2 years of hard work was thrown into the window. Im just so happy that this didnt happen to my sister during her ib exams. Im also SO THANKFUL that I just passed the minimum requirement to continue sixth form in my school.

Now I really want to be a doctor and study medicine in uni but I dont think thats realistic anymore. Medicine is such an expensive course and I dont want to burden my mother. Im thinking of doing dentistry or a similar course thats cheaper. I dont know anymore :/ I cry almost every night cos of this. I dont know who to feel sorry for anymore. Me?? My sister?? My mom??

I dont know. Should I just suck all this **** up by myself??

Hey

This is a really tough situation you're in and I just wanted to say that if you ever want to talk confidentially about stuff, you're free to PM me here for you.

I wonder if there is a chance at all that you could talk to your Mum alone about all this? Get her opinion on what is going on and have a heart to heart discussion. Does she understand what is going on fully? Does she know how you feel about your dad?

Also I worry that it may hamper your efforts for your A levels, have you considered counselling or similar stuff?

Best of luck x

Yeah I've told my mum countless of times already and she tries to tell my dad so he can understand that what he's doing isnt right. But everytime they talk about his actions, my dad gets all defensive and acting as if he does nothing wrong :/ So they eventually fight. Also, since my mom's a doctor she relies on my dad to send me to school and pick me up. But if he gets angry at her he wont send me anywhere - what a prick amiright? Cos of that, my mum just tells me to "put up with it for two more years".

I already know that his behaviour is gonna compromise my A-Levels I've been wanting to talk to the school counselor about my situation but its not like they could physically do anything and I dont wanna cry in front of them :/ I've also been thinking of convincing my whole family to go to a private counsellor somewhere so a third party can confirm that my dad's a douchebag. But right now, I'm probably just going to go to my school counsellor.

Thanks for replying to my post tho ) Oh and I might take you up on your offer about PM-ing u