Ex messaged me saying he is 'in love' with someone else?!

We broke up two months ago, and around that time he was always purposefully trying to hurt me. For example, he would ignore me and he tried to upset me on my birthday too. That was when I knew we wouldn't work out.

We started chatting again before I went on holiday, just 2 weeks ago and said we could meet up when I got home. When I was on holiday, he then text me saying he has 'met someone, and feels like he's falling in love'..within the space of a week?!

I don't know if this is true, or if he is trying to set out to hurt me as he has done in the past. I said that I felt like he was trying to do this, but he claims he wasn't. Help?

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

OP

Help

Reply 2

carrotstar

21

Original post by Anonymous

Help

I'm not sure what sort of advice you're looking for! What you have to remember is that he's your ex for a reason. Why would you want to get back together with him when he hurt you so much?

I suggest you send him one final text asking to delete your number and cut ties altogether. Delete from social media, the works. Don't let him tempt you back in, and don't let him make you jealous, otherwise you'll never heal and be able to move on.

Reply 3

Tiger Rag

22

He's doing it to get a reaction. As mentioned above, I'd cut contact with him.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

I think it was because I sort of hoped we would get back together, and work things out.

We broke up not long after I returned from studying abroad, which really hurt me.

I feel so sad :frown:

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

When he told me, I reacted quite badly. I just don't know how he can be in love with someone else after just a week?! Considering he said we could meet up after my holiday

Reply 6

Holoha

10

Original post by Anonymous

We broke up two months ago, and around that time he was always purposefully trying to hurt me. For example, he would ignore me and he tried to upset me on my birthday too. That was when I knew we wouldn't work out.

We started chatting again before I went on holiday, just 2 weeks ago and said we could meet up when I got home. When I was on holiday, he then text me saying he has 'met someone, and feels like he's falling in love'..within the space of a week?!

I don't know if this is true, or if he is trying to set out to hurt me as he has done in the past. I said that I felt like he was trying to do this, but he claims he wasn't. Help?

If I was in a relationship where I thought or felt the other was purposely trying to hurt me I would question whether or not to move on. Whether they were consciously knowing of their behavior or not I would interpret the situation being that we don't relate well together and prolonging the situation may damage my relational patterns further thus causing difficulties in future relationships.
I also would not want to spend time with someone where I feel bad. I would want to feel valued, appreciated, like the best thing ever and if they were spending time with someone and thought they were falling in love I think I'd feel pretty hurt.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

But, I don't know if he is lying about it just to provoke a reaction out of me. We haven't spoken since he said that and I deleted his number.

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

I just don't understand.

Cut ties.

Original post by Anonymous

I just don't understand.

I'm sorry because it will be hard, but even if he is trying to cause a reaction, are you really better off with someone like that in the long term? I'd get out now whilst you have a good chance! Use your friends and family for support because they know you the best.

Reply 11

paulbarlow

14

send the message. thats nice for you. nothing else and then ignore him. the guy is messing with you.

Reply 12

gymkana3000

10

Original post by Anonymous

I think it was because I sort of hoped we would get back together, and work things out.

We broke up not long after I returned from studying abroad, which really hurt me.

I feel so sad :frown:

Honestly he doesn't seem like he's that nice of a person. Your best bet as above is to cut contact from him and don't give him the attention he's after, there are better people out there who deserve your attention - not some attention seeker! I know it seems difficult, I've been there too, but it's worth it in the end :smile:

Reply 13

username2393237

21

He's probably lying, but he's clearly an immature tosspot anyway. Cut off all contact and block his number.

Reply 14

username3441700

20

What are you doing, block the idiot. He's just trying to make you jealous.

Reply 15

cheesecakelove

20

I'm not sure why you were still in contact with him. From what you have said, he doesn't seem like a good person, and why would he try to arrange to meet you only to tell you he loves someone else not long after?! I know you may still have feelings for him, but I believe a clean break is best. You don't need him and the games he plays.

Reply 16

Anonymous #1

OP

I blocked him, I feel so much better. But I'm still finding it hard because I was with him for so long. I just find it incredibly odd as usually, he is so nice :frown:

he just turned nasty and I'm not sure I can forgive that!

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

OP

Just feel so down right now.

Reply 18

ashhh__

I'm not going to tell you to cheer up, it obviously won't work. However, what I can tell you is that it'll all pass before you even know it and you'll forget about them. In a few years time you'll look back on your relationship and think 'who the Hell is that guy? I don't remember their name' and 'I can hardly remember anything about them'.
Trust me it'll all get better. For now, just let out all of your frustration at the wall, or rant to a friend, getting it out of your system, then have a sit down with a tub of ice cream and watch your favourite show :smile:

Just take your mind off them as much as you can.
They may have been lying, they may have not, but second chances hardly work out well.

Ex messaged me saying he is 'in love' with someone else?!

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