My grandad is about to die

My grandad has been in hospital for a month and we just found out his cancer has spread to his spine and lungs. My mum and gran have just had a call to come in now because he has deteriorated. I'm pretty sure this means he's going to die and I don't know why to do with myself. Someone please tell me what to do. I can't stop crying

Reply 1

claireestelle

22

Original post by Anonymous

My grandad has been in hospital for a month and we just found out his cancer has spread to his spine and lungs. My mum and gran have just had a call to come in now because he has deteriorated. I'm pretty sure this means he's going to die and I don't know why to do with myself. Someone please tell me what to do. I can't stop crying

Perhaps go with them if you feel comfortable to say good bye, it's a personal choice as with the few deaths I ve dealt with and didn't and my last memory is them being more healthy but I don't really get the closure of saying goodbye. Crying is a perfectly normal thing to do it's better to work through and process it than bottle it up

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

Cry as much as needed - don't hold it in.

I would spend as much time with him as possible but its up to you - you might not want to.

Reply 3

Kindred

20

Original post by Anonymous

My grandad has been in hospital for a month and we just found out his cancer has spread to his spine and lungs. My mum and gran have just had a call to come in now because he has deteriorated. I'm pretty sure this means he's going to die and I don't know why to do with myself. Someone please tell me what to do. I can't stop crying

At the end of the day, there isn't anything right or wrong you can do. It's all about you and what makes you feel more comfortable.
From my own experience I can tell you that no matter what you do or don't do it will suck you will cry and feel like the whole world is over and then you will calm down a bit and things won't feel so broken any more and eventually you'll be fine.

I would tend to suggest going over there, saying you love him and giving him a hug. If you like you can stay with him for a while too.

Reply 4

Ryanthom100

22

Omg I feel so sorry for you :frown:

. I'm gonna mention @PhilDanthropist as I'm pretty sure shes been through something similar to this. Hope u get better, but remember to spend time with ur family as it will help :smile:

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by usualsuspects

Read a book on netiquette.

Are you trying to be funny or just horrible?

Reply 6

username2808586

9

Original post by usualsuspects

You should keep certain things private. It's inconsiderate to make thousands of people online participate in your mourning. And ill-mannered to publicly advertise your suffering and loss on the internet.

How dare you. This is a community to support others. If someone needs comfort and advice, there are some kind and caring people on here that are willing to give it. You are welcome not reply to these threads. However, it is never acceptable for someone to make someone feel worse about themselves for asking for help to cope with their grief

Reply 7

Uranium Potato

17

When my grandma died, what comforted me the most was that she would not suffer anymore pain - ever. I'm also a practicing Christian, so it also comforted me of the hope that she would be with God, a much better place than here. You should just cry, it gets better over time - trust me.

Reply 8

CheeseIsVeg

22

Original post by Anonymous

My grandad has been in hospital for a month and we just found out his cancer has spread to his spine and lungs. My mum and gran have just had a call to come in now because he has deteriorated. I'm pretty sure this means he's going to die and I don't know why to do with myself. Someone please tell me what to do. I can't stop crying

Please take some time alone to yourself and to take in what has happened
As another said, go visit, go give him a hug and be with your family :hugs:

I remember when this happened to my own Grandad and if you want to talk my PMs are always open :heart:

Here for you x

Reply 9

username2808586

9

Original post by usualsuspects

There is a reason why OP's conduct is improper. Seeing the title ruined my mood as it made me recall my own late grandparents and other close people who died recently.

That is unfortunate, but surely you know better than anyone how this person feels and making them feel worse is the last thing you should want to do. This may have upset you bust I am struggling to see what you have achieved by making them feel worse?

Reply 10

Elastichedgehog

20

Original post by Anonymous

My grandad has been in hospital for a month and we just found out his cancer has spread to his spine and lungs. My mum and gran have just had a call to come in now because he has deteriorated. I'm pretty sure this means he's going to die and I don't know why to do with myself. Someone please tell me what to do. I can't stop crying