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    I'm 17 and for a few months I have been wanting to see someone about my mental health. Only problem is, informing my parents of this would be the worst - mostly due to cultural reasons.

    I don't have any friends really to talk to about this and I'm scared.
    To help, I've been talking to myself aloud in my room whilst sitting on my bed. Not necessarily to anyone, just saying my thoughts out loud because they get too crammed up in my head.

    One issue I would like to consult with a potential counselor would be regarding my experience of sexual assault/child molestation that I am only recently coming to terms with.

    Will he/she have to report something like this?
    Can counselors keep things you tell them confidential?
    Do my parents have to be aware of possible counseling sessions?

    Thank you
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    Anyone? Thanks
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm 17 and for a few months I have been wanting to see someone about my mental health. Only problem is, informing my parents of this would be the worst - mostly due to cultural reasons.

    I don't have any friends really to talk to about this and I'm scared.
    To help, I've been talking to myself aloud in my room whilst sitting on my bed. Not necessarily to anyone, just saying my thoughts out loud because they get too crammed up in my head.

    One issue I would like to consult with a potential counselor would be regarding my experience of sexual assault/child molestation that I am only recently coming to terms with.

    Will he/she have to report something like this?
    Can counselors keep things you tell them confidential?
    Do my parents have to be aware of possible counseling sessions?

    Thank you

    I assume if you see a counselor that if you ask for it to be confidential then they will keep it confidential. But if you mention killing yourself or something then they maybe would contact the police or something (not 100% sure on that bit though) I dont think they'd tell your parents about it if you didnt want them to, you could go to the doctors or something like that as they have to keep it private, or you can go to a support group and hide it from your parents or something.
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    Normally counsellors keep everything you tell them confidential unless they think you are going to cause harm to yourself or another person. Your parents do not need to be notified about you receiving counselling sessions, mine do not know that I am getting them
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    (Original post by hannah4801)
    Normally counsellors keep everything you tell them confidential unless they think you are going to cause harm to yourself or another person. Your parents do not need to be notified about you receiving counselling sessions, mine do not know that I am getting them
    Okay, thank you a lot

    How did you go about it? Did you speak to your GP first or call your hospital?
    Has it helped? Have you had to request a change of counselors ever for any reason?

    I'm so relieved to know that they keep things confidential and thank you for replying
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Okay, thank you a lot

    How did you go about it? Did you speak to your GP first or call your hospital?
    Has it helped? Have you had to request a change of counselors ever for any reason?

    I'm so relieved to know that they keep things confidential and thank you for replying
    I'm receiving it through my college but I know that you visit your GP if you want to receive it through the NHS. I'd say it's helped a bit but you do feel worse at first but then gradually feel better. Just give it a go and see how you feel about it. And no I've only had one have never had the need to change
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    (Original post by hannah4801)
    I'm receiving it through my college but I know that you visit your GP if you want to receive it through the NHS. I'd say it's helped a bit but you do feel worse at first but then gradually feel better. Just give it a go and see how you feel about it. And no I've only had one have never had the need to change
    Thank you
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you
    No bother
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    They only break confidentiality if they think someone is at immediate risk or if it's an immediate legal matter (say you were very suicidal or you beat someone up/stole something). They could take legal action against your sexual abuser, but you'd have to press charges yourself since you're now over the age of consent. It's unlikely they'd do that without you being on board though, as they understand that having someone to trust and talk with is more valuable than legal action sometimes. Confidentiality is one of the first things you'll discuss with a counsellor.

    Your parents don't have to know at all. I'd recommend seeing a counsellor at your college or going to see if your local doctor surgery has one. Good luck and well done on seeking support!
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    you could see to a doctor who might refer you or speak to a school conseller. everything is confidential unless you were to tell a teacher as they have to report anything where there is risk to you or someone else.
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    (Original post by crocodile_ears)
    They only break confidentiality if they think someone is at immediate risk or if it's an immediate legal matter (say you were very suicidal or you beat someone up/stole something). They could take legal action against your sexual abuser, but you'd have to press charges yourself since you're now over the age of consent. It's unlikely they'd do that without you being on board though, as they understand that having someone to trust and talk with is more valuable than legal action sometimes. Confidentiality is one of the first things you'll discuss with a counsellor.

    Your parents don't have to know at all. I'd recommend seeing a counsellor at your college or going to see if your local doctor surgery has one. Good luck and well done on seeking support!
    Thank you

    My college is really great and has an outstanding support system for students but I've never thought about going ahead with counseling there. Would that be better do you think? The thought of seeing a member of staff walking down the hallway knowing everything is quite off putting.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you

    My college is really great and has an outstanding support system for students but I've never thought about going ahead with counseling there. Would that be better do you think? The thought of seeing a member of staff walking down the hallway knowing everything is quite off putting.
    School counsellors dont tell staff anything, tbh the worst issues i had was with staff telling other staff stuff but I never had any issues with the school counsellor telling staff things so don't worry about that :hugs: going to a counsellor internally might be better if you dont want your parents to ask questions about where you have been etc
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    (Original post by Miss Charlie)
    you could see to a doctor who might refer you or speak to a school conseller. everything is confidential unless you were to tell a teacher as they have to report anything where there is risk to you or someone else.
    Oh okay, thank you
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    School counsellors dont tell staff anything, tbh the worst issues i had was with staff telling other staff stuff but I never had any issues with the school counsellor telling staff things so don't worry about that :hugs: going to a counsellor internally might be better if you dont want your parents to ask questions about where you have been etc
    I even prefer the sound of speaking to a school counselor and will organise that next week

    Thank you
    • #3
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm 17 and for a few months I have been wanting to see someone about my mental health. Only problem is, informing my parents of this would be the worst - mostly due to cultural reasons.

    I don't have any friends really to talk to about this and I'm scared.
    To help, I've been talking to myself aloud in my room whilst sitting on my bed. Not necessarily to anyone, just saying my thoughts out loud because they get too crammed up in my head.

    One issue I would like to consult with a potential counselor would be regarding my experience of sexual assault/child molestation that I am only recently coming to terms with.

    Will he/she have to report something like this?
    Can counselors keep things you tell them confidential?
    Do my parents have to be aware of possible counseling sessions?

    Thank you
    I CAN RELATE SO MUCH TO THIS (expect the sexual assualt situation, to which, i'm so sorry this has happened to you) I'm black and come from a black family, and due to cultural differences, they don't take my mental health seriously. I have amazing friends but I find it so hard to open up to them, and my siblings don't really seem to get how i feel, i always feel so alone and when i'm in my room by myself, i say things out loud too to get my feelings out in the open. I want to start seeing a school counsellor too, so I would recommend starting with that. Everything is confidential unless they believe you could be in danger, so don't worry about your parents or anyone else finding out. I hope that helps
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you

    My college is really great and has an outstanding support system for students but I've never thought about going ahead with counselling there. Would that be better do you think? The thought of seeing a member of staff walking down the hallway knowing everything is quite off putting.
    It is weird seeing a counsellor outside of sessions, but not painfully awkward or anything because you build trust over time. I had one counsellor who was volunteering at my school as part of her degree, and I saw her about a year after working in pc world. I almost bought a computer off of her

    It was strange, but also kind of nice - a reminder that there are lots of people around who really care about others and want to help, even if you can't see it. 'Members of staff' turn into trustworthy people after a while, you'll laugh and cry with your counsellor and in time it won't feel alien that they know a lot of stuff.

    I'd recommend going to the one at your school because it's much more practical, and it's easier for the school to meet any mental health related needs. For example, during exams I sit in a room separate from the exam hall because of my anxiety, and my counsellor sorted that out really easily for me. Go and try it out, persevere through the first few sessions and see how you feel. If there's anything you don't like, tell your counsellor about it, and just be as honest as possible.
    • #1
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I CAN RELATE SO MUCH TO THIS (expect the sexual assualt situation, to which, i'm so sorry this has happened to you) I'm black and come from a black family, and due to cultural differences, they don't take my mental health seriously. I have amazing friends but I find it so hard to open up to them, and my siblings don't really seem to get how i feel, i always feel so alone and when i'm in my room by myself, i say things out loud too to get my feelings out in the open. I want to start seeing a school counsellor too, so I would recommend starting with that. Everything is confidential unless they believe you could be in danger, so don't worry about your parents or anyone else finding out. I hope that helps
    Yeah I'm black too so if I was to even mention my situation to my parents they'd either hate me or think I was delusional. They just wouldn't get it.

    Thank you and I hope all goes well for you
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    (Original post by crocodile_ears)
    It is weird seeing a counsellor outside of sessions, but not painfully awkward or anything because you build trust over time. I had one counsellor who was volunteering at my school as part of her degree, and I saw her about a year after working in pc world. I almost bought a computer off of her

    It was strange, but also kind of nice - a reminder that there are lots of people around who really care about others and want to help, even if you can't see it. 'Members of staff' turn into trustworthy people after a while, you'll laugh and cry with your counsellor and in time it won't feel alien that they know a lot of stuff.

    I'd recommend going to the one at your school because it's much more practical, and it's easier for the school to meet any mental health related needs. For example, during exams I sit in a room separate from the exam hall because of my anxiety, and my counsellor sorted that out really easily for me. Go and try it out, persevere through the first few sessions and see how you feel. If there's anything you don't like, tell your counsellor about it, and just be as honest as possible.
    Thank you so much
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm 17 and for a few months I have been wanting to see someone about my mental health. Only problem is, informing my parents of this would be the worst - mostly due to cultural reasons.

    I don't have any friends really to talk to about this and I'm scared.
    To help, I've been talking to myself aloud in my room whilst sitting on my bed. Not necessarily to anyone, just saying my thoughts out loud because they get too crammed up in my head.

    One issue I would like to consult with a potential counselor would be regarding my experience of sexual assault/child molestation that I am only recently coming to terms with.

    Will he/she have to report something like this?
    Can counselors keep things you tell them confidential?
    Do my parents have to be aware of possible counseling sessions?

    Thank you
    This is a perfectly healthy way of sorting things out, actually - have you thought about writing? Maybe a diary/journal, maybe poetry or lyrics or stories? Pain is the mother of creativity, and being greative eases pain.

    But yes: as others have said here, you can get help through a GP and have it all remain confidential.

    You'll be OK, you seem to have got a pretty good handle on yourself anyway, and that's most of the battle. All a counselor does is listen and encourage you to talk; everything you need is already there in your head.
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    (Original post by Tootles)
    This is a perfectly healthy way of sorting things out, actually - have you thought about writing? Maybe a diary/journal, maybe poetry or lyrics or stories? Pain is the mother of creativity, and being greative eases pain.

    But yes: as others have said here, you can get help through a GP and have it all remain confidential.

    You'll be OK, you seem to have got a pretty good handle on yourself anyway, and that's most of the battle. All a counselor does is listen and encourage you to talk; everything you need is already there in your head.
    Yes I do write poetry and keep a journal however I don't write in in regularly (maybe once every 3 months which is enough for me) and sometimes I go to open mic spoken word events with my sister and say a few things and it has helped temporarily

    Thank you, I was just worried about everything turning into a big legal situation which I don't want at all.
 
 
 
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