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A Desperate Third Year (Homesickness) Watch

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    So I'm about to start my third year of uni this year and everything seemed really good up until I arrived here.
    I kept saying over the summer to my parents how I was excited to start my course again, and I honestly thought: great, for once I am actually not dreading going back.

    I'll just add that I have friends here, who I really do like. Which for me makes it all the more frustrating as to why I feel this way because I feel I have no reason to feel this way...

    Now I'm back, and I haven't stopped crying since my parents left me yesterday. Last night was horrendous, I actually got so stressed that I ended up being sick, and I've just got no motivation this morning to do anything. I was messaging them through all this, but all I get is: "You don't need to be crying", "You've got so much to look forward to."

    It just doesn't help me tbh.

    All I want is for my parents to knock on the door and take me home at this point: to my friends, my pets, my family, my country. I hate it here, honestly my idea of hell at this point is being made to come back to university for the rest of my life.

    I'm at my wits end really, and I have no idea how I'm going to cope for a week let alone eight months. I've tried counselling, I've tried to keep my mind off of if...I've tried everything suggested to me by others but my homesickness just seems to be getting worse every time I'm dragged back here.

    Going home or commuting isn't really an option as I live a good seven hours away by train. And to top it off my brother started uni last week and is going home this weekend - I feel it's just rubbing salt in the wound and reminding me that he's only two hours away from home and HAS that option. I don't know whether I should do the same every so often.

    I'm just desperate really, because I feel like the only third year who feels this way. Everyone else, even my housemates, doesn't seem to be feeling what I'm feeling and ultimately it just makes me feel incredibly lonely. The only thing that's keeping me sane now is the prospect of graduating and never having to come back, but then what?
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    First of all, moving out 7 hours away was a bit too far.

    Second, you literally only have 9 months left and you will be home. Focus on your third year. See a doctor if you need to and seek support from the university.

    Don’t ruin your final year grade over being homesick.

    Can you get the megabus home? It will be longer, but cheaper.
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    (Original post by Ishax)
    First of all, moving out 7 hours away was a bit too far.

    Second, you literally only have 9 months left and you will be home. Focus on your third year. See a doctor if you need to and seek support from the university.

    Don’t ruin your final year grade over being homesick.

    Can you get the megabus home? It will be longer, but cheaper.

    Thanks for responding.

    Tbh I agree, I regrettably realised very early on that I'd moved way too far away. But it was honestly the best university for what I wanted to do, and to go to uni where I live you'd have to travel at least an hour anyway.

    I've tried support, and I've had counselling, but I just feel I end up going back to my already diagnosed anxiety and depression. Which isn't helpful. I'm like: I know how to deal with that, it's the homesickness that's a problem.

    Thankfully expense isn't an issue, I get free train travel, it's just the distance and my parents warning me not to give up lectures to go home. But tbh, I've done that in the past and by some miracle through all my misery I've been getting firsts. I just don't know if visiting home more often is an option or not.
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    I will add that I have friends here who I get on with and like, and I enjoy the course for the most part. But I feel this just adds to my frustration because I feel I have even less reason to be this way.
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    (Original post by AnonIsBest)
    Thanks for responding.

    Tbh I agree, I regrettably realised very early on that I'd moved way too far away. But it was honestly the best university for what I wanted to do, and to go to uni where I live you'd have to travel at least an hour anyway.

    I've tried support, and I've had counselling, but I just feel I end up going back to my already diagnosed anxiety and depression. Which isn't helpful. I'm like: I know how to deal with that, it's the homesickness that's a problem.

    Thankfully expense isn't an issue, I get free train travel, it's just the distance and my parents warning me not to give up lectures to go home. But tbh, I've done that in the past and by some miracle through all my misery I've been getting firsts. I just don't know if visiting home more often is an option or not.
    That’s not too bad then, depends how many days you’re in. Considering it’s your third year, try to make a schedule of when to do work and visit home.

    In hindsight, you only have 9 months left. You said, you have friends on the course and enjoy it too so the time should fly by.

    At least you’re seeking support, you may be eligible for extenuating circumstances if the situation gets you worse. Continue to seek support.
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    (Original post by Ishax)
    That’s not too bad then, depends how many days you’re in. Considering it’s your third year, try to make a schedule of when to do work and visit home.

    In hindsight, you only have 9 months left. You said, you have friends on the course and enjoy it too so the time should fly by.

    At least you’re seeking support, you may be eligible for extenuating circumstances if the situation gets you worse. Continue to seek support.
    Okay I will definitely think about doing all of that - thank you for the advice! It's honestly appreciated.
 
 
 
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