The Student Room Group

Should i drop out of uni?

Hi everyone I started studying at uni recently. Its been a few days and i really don't think university is for me. I feel very lonely and hate living by myself. I have no one to speak to and I don't like living away from my family. Every night i just sit in my room and cry. If i do drop out however i have nothing else to do but at least i would be happy and not lonely all the time. Thanks for any responses.

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Sitting in your room and crying is not helping. If you're lonely you should be getting out of your room and actively trying to meet new people.

No I don't think you should drop out this soon, especially since you don't have a back up plan.

Yes adjusting is hard, but you never will if you give up straight away.
Yeah like SophieSmall said, it would be pointless moving out now as it would be just as difficult later on when you try again. Look into societies in your university (majority of universities, if not all, have societies - They're usually managed by your uni's Student Union) that you're interested in, and you'll meet new people quickly. Maybe try to talk to people in your course too, even if it's just in small amounts until you figure out who everyone is. Also, your University should have their own GP and counsellor (at least a lot of the time they do). Look into that, as it's quite common for homesickness etc and it's extremely common. People suffer from it in different ways in different strengths. The uni counsellor is there for that exact (and other) reason(s). Its also all confidential. I'd say don't give up right now, you may really regret it later, look into societies as they can be a great place to make new friends (and can be very fun if you enjoy what the society does), and look into speaking to a uni counsellor (Which your uni hopefully does have) which may help you with your emotions. Hope that helps :tongue:
Original post by TooNocturnal
Yeah like SophieSmall said, it would be pointless moving out now as it would be just as difficult later on when you try again. Look into societies in your university (majority of universities, if not all, have societies - They're usually managed by your uni's Student Union) that you're interested in, and you'll meet new people quickly. Maybe try to talk to people in your course too, even if it's just in small amounts until you figure out who everyone is. Also, your University should have their own GP and counsellor (at least a lot of the time they do). Look into that, as it's quite common for homesickness etc and it's extremely common. People suffer from it in different ways in different strengths. The uni counsellor is there for that exact (and other) reason(s). Its also all confidential. I'd say don't give up right now, you may really regret it later, look into societies as they can be a great place to make new friends (and can be very fun if you enjoy what the society does), and look into speaking to a uni counsellor (Which your uni hopefully does have) which may help you with your emotions. Hope that helps :tongue:

Also everyone in my flat is a massive introvert in the fact that they never come out whenever you say you wanna go anywhere. I might have to go back home at weekends as the last couple i have had nothing to do and that i feel extremely lonely in the day.
If it's any consolation, you're not the only one brother, you're not the only one :smile:
Original post by ElAshtonio
If it's any consolation, you're not the only one brother, you're not the only one :smile:


Thanks man, just hoping i could make a group of friends that have similar interests with me.
Original post by Patrick917HD
Also everyone in my flat is a massive introvert in the fact that they never come out whenever you say you wanna go anywhere. I might have to go back home at weekends as the last couple i have had nothing to do and that i feel extremely lonely in the day.


I get that. My roommates are a little on the quite side too. The occasional "Hi" and "Bye" in the kitchen and minus that it's all silent. Makes it awkward trying to make conversations lol. It would be a good idea to go home on weekends sometimes, at least definitely on the first month or two. It really helps with homesickness and is a very common thing to do (I mean... Your home is your permanent address, term address is temporary. I think everyone expects all students to return home often at times.)

Another thing to do is maybe if you haven't already, buy a few things for your room that would help pass time for whenever you are stuck there. I.e TV, Console, Netflix or another streaming subscription (as you only need a TV licence when watching live channels or iPlayer, you can still watch Netflix etc on TV). That way you aren't stuck in your room with only your thoughts which doesn't help with the home sickness.
Original post by Patrick917HD
Hi everyone I started studying at uni recently. Its been a few days and i really don't think university is for me. I feel very lonely and hate living by myself. I have no one to speak to and I don't like living away from my family. Every night i just sit in my room and cry. If i do drop out however i have nothing else to do but at least i would be happy and not lonely all the time. Thanks for any responses.


Dont drop out. The essence of the university is to learn, be challenged and grow. You cannot run away from things when life does not go your way.

Stay at uni, get out of your room and make friends. You have only been there for a few weeks.
Sitting there alone in the room isn't going to help.

Get out there, introduce yourself and converse with people at your lectures and tutorials.

Join clubs and societies.

You could try to watch movies on netflix or bring in your games console.

You could ask your local universities if they would accept you next year.

If you decide to drop out, drop out now, not when you've failed a year or decide to drop out after one year and there could be financial implications (student finance may not give you your first year funding for your first year of your second degree).
(edited 7 years ago)
Original post by Patrick917HD
Hi everyone I started studying at uni recently. Its been a few days and i really don't think university is for me. I feel very lonely and hate living by myself. I have no one to speak to and I don't like living away from my family. Every night i just sit in my room and cry. If i do drop out however i have nothing else to do but at least i would be happy and not lonely all the time. Thanks for any responses.


Join societies. They are the easiest way to make friends who share your interests.
Tbh, go to the gym. Just dedicate yourself to studying and building your body. Hey, even if you don't have any friends after you graduate, you will definitely have a solid body that you can be proud of and a degree that shows you are a capable human being. If you do go to gym, it will be very likely that you will make friends within the first 6 months, even if you are not one to initiate a conversation. Hope you don't drop out, real world is tough and a degree will atleast give you an edge when you enter the job market.
Yeah u aren’t entitled to friends so u gotta get up and go make some

Don’t be a pussy and drop out
(edited 7 years ago)
Thanks guys, I talked to my parents and my university and they said I can drop out now and that I won't have to pay that much of my tution fees and accomodation fees, i feel like i have taken the decision after much consideration to leave uni and pursue a more practical training scheme such as an apprenticeship as that is what will ultimately make me happy and will enjoy. The fact that uni isn't for everyone reiterates the fact that I think it is forced upon people who truly do not desire to go on to advanced education as a formality and that you get made to feel stupid not to go even if stupid people go to former polytechnics. Ultimately the decision is what is going to make you happy, if money isn't an issue in the future then would you do the studying for today. The fact that people make uni out to be some amazing place after you finish school is a myth. I enjoyed studying and if i could go to uni from my home i would but there is no decent unis in the surrounding area. I hope I can come back to this thread in times in the future and that i will have succeeded in my dreams and aspirations.
Original post by Patrick917HD
Thanks guys, I talked to my parents and my university and they said I can drop out now and that I won't have to pay that much of my tution fees and accomodation fees, i feel like i have taken the decision after much consideration to leave uni and pursue a more practical training scheme such as an apprenticeship as that is what will ultimately make me happy and will enjoy. The fact that uni isn't for everyone reiterates the fact that I think it is forced upon people who truly do not desire to go on to advanced education as a formality and that you get made to feel stupid not to go even if stupid people go to former polytechnics. Ultimately the decision is what is going to make you happy, if money isn't an issue in the future then would you do the studying for today. The fact that people make uni out to be some amazing place after you finish school is a myth. I enjoyed studying and if i could go to uni from my home i would but there is no decent unis in the surrounding area. I hope I can come back to this thread in times in the future and that i will have succeeded in my dreams and aspirations.




A very brave decision, I wish you all the luck in the world. Take some time and think about what you really want. There are many options out there - apprenticeships and the Open University spring to mind. Perhaps you just need a little more time. Whatever you decide made sure it is right for you. I am sure you will do well, Good Luck.
Original post by rhiannon277
A very brave decision, I wish you all the luck in the world. Take some time and think about what you really want. There are many options out there - apprenticeships and the Open University spring to mind. Perhaps you just need a little more time. Whatever you decide made sure it is right for you. I am sure you will do well, Good Luck.

Thanks
Hi, I just want to say well done for making a very difficult decision. I dropped out too, but now I'm back at university. People are pushed into it. We're looked after for so long and then pushed out on our own. Most people cope, but it shouldn't be seen as a weakness to know that you're not ready. I'm glad you've got a plan for afterwards too. Uni shouldn't be the be all and end all. Good luck x
Original post by Serenity8
Hi, I just want to say well done for making a very difficult decision. I dropped out too, but now I'm back at university. People are pushed into it. We're looked after for so long and then pushed out on our own. Most people cope, but it shouldn't be seen as a weakness to know that you're not ready. I'm glad you've got a plan for afterwards too. Uni shouldn't be the be all and end all. Good luck x

Are you enjoying uni now?
I'm getting there. I felt overwhelmed when I got here but two days in and I can definitely say it's better than last time. It's a new place and I've more confidence and maturity than I did before. Thank you for asking :smile:
Original post by Patrick917HD
Hi everyone I started studying at uni recently. Its been a few days and i really don't think university is for me. I feel very lonely and hate living by myself. I have no one to speak to and I don't like living away from my family. Every night i just sit in my room and cry. If i do drop out however i have nothing else to do but at least i would be happy and not lonely all the time. Thanks for any responses.


If you can get out of any student debt incurred, it might be wise. University can be harsh, and isn't a guarantee of a good job! If your family will offer you a place to stay, then that'd be very useful. You might change your mind in a year or two, might be able to resit A levels (improving grades & options). Work experience tends to hold more value than University study, unless you're becoming a medical or teacher type?
Original post by Patrick917HD
Hi everyone I started studying at uni recently. Its been a few days and i really don't think university is for me. I feel very lonely and hate living by myself. I have no one to speak to and I don't like living away from my family. Every night i just sit in my room and cry. If i do drop out however i have nothing else to do but at least i would be happy and not lonely all the time. Thanks for any responses.


Oh dear! please don't give up without putting up a fight. Are you doing a course that you are really enjoying or that will contribute to your career. Why not make friends with people from the course and invite them over. Or join a society at your university which will be another great way to meet people and pursue your interests. And you didn't mention whether you still live in the same city as your family, when does your contract run out, it could be an option to continue with your course but move back in with your parents?