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    so i'm 20 (female) and have yet to have sex. when i think about why, the main reason seems to be that i HATE my body. i have no boobs/bum and just feel super gross. no one's ever seen me naked and i'm just so scared of what they might think or how they'd react. it's really annoying me as i want to feel confident getting into a relationship and i want to have sex but this self esteem problem is getting in the way. has anyone else had body issues relating to sex and how did you overcome them?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    so i'm 20 (female) and have yet to have sex. when i think about why, the main reason seems to be that i HATE my body. i have no boobs/bum and just feel super gross. no one's ever seen me naked and i'm just so scared of what they might think or how they'd react. it's really annoying me as i want to feel confident getting into a relationship and i want to have sex but this self esteem problem is getting in the way. has anyone else had body issues relating to sex and how did you overcome them?
    Once you find someone who likes you, they can tell your body shape without having to see you naked. And they clearly like what you look like well enough to have a relationship with you.

    I was pretty self-conscious to begin with, I get back acne and I'm overweight so always thought I look awful naked, especially when you're on the bed with your tummy fat bunching up together.

    So while I've been building up general confidence by myself, my partner helped a lot in the body confidence way because he will randomly tell me how beautiful or gorgeous I am or how lucky he is to have me. And there's the obvious indications that he's attracted when I walk around naked or half naked.

    So honestly, if you're in a relationship with someone, they clearly like you as you are already. So don't worry about what others look like compared to you.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    so i'm 20 (female) and have yet to have sex. when i think about why, the main reason seems to be that i HATE my body. i have no boobs/bum and just feel super gross. no one's ever seen me naked and i'm just so scared of what they might think or how they'd react. it's really annoying me as i want to feel confident getting into a relationship and i want to have sex but this self esteem problem is getting in the way. has anyone else had body issues relating to sex and how did you overcome them?
    I had the same problem. I lost my virginity mostly clothed and its only been in the last couple of weeks that my boyfriend has seen me fully naked. I have always been super self conscious with my weight and how i look but my boyfriend loves it. He always tells me that "when a guy see's a girl, he will kind of know what to expect when he see's her naked" and he admitted to ne that he knew i was going to be a little chubby, but he didnt care, because he loves me, and he loves me body. I will say that i am still not happy with my body right now and sometimes i refuse to have sex unless its dark; because that way he can't see me.

    The advice i can give you is that, if any guy thinks any less of you because you have no boobs/bum then he is extremely shallow and he does not deserve to have sex with you. Like my boyfriend says, guys will sometimes know what theyre 'getting themselves into' or 'what to expect'. somebody is going to love you for your beautiful soul and they are going to love your fabulous body and they're going to make you feel all the happiness you deserve, and when you're with them everything will be okay. it is really difficult to completely overcome an insecurity like this, but it does get more bearable.

    -B
    • #3
    #3

    I completely understand how you feel. It took me a few months to be able to get completely naked with my boyfriend and finally have sex for the first time. You just need to find someone who makes you comfortable enough that you will start accepting yourself and it won't care as much anymore. I feel much more confident about my body now that I have someone that genuinely loves the way I look and the shape of my body.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    so i'm 20 (female) and have yet to have sex. when i think about why, the main reason seems to be that i HATE my body. i have no boobs/bum and just feel super gross. no one's ever seen me naked and i'm just so scared of what they might think or how they'd react. it's really annoying me as i want to feel confident getting into a relationship and i want to have sex but this self esteem problem is getting in the way. has anyone else had body issues relating to sex and how did you overcome them?
    I expect that once you meet someone you trust and loves you back, you'll feel a lot better for it.

    My advice in the short term is a bit leftfield and would require you to be quite brace and embrace it but if you tried going to somewhere where there's a lot of naked people around you, you'll probably find that no one would bat an eyelid at your nudity and you'd realise that no none was judging you. You could try somewhere like a female only sauna to see how you get on.
 
 
 
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