The Student Room Group

Where to go from here

(leave anon please, friends on here)

Basically i was getting very friendly (flirting like mad) with a girl in my friends group at a party a few weeks ago, neither of us had a drop to drink though and nothing happened although ther were rumours amongst other friends that something did.

Anyway at a party on saturday (both drunk) we ended up kissing privately, then after a while just on the sofa where everyone could see, kissing and drunkenly chatting with our heads together. Later on in the night in private I went to base 2 with her (me to her..furthest i've gone) although it was approaching the time she'd said she had to go so i walked her to the bus stop (friend was with us) and she left.

Anyway i told one of my closest friends what happened, needless to say it spread like wildfire. Anyway i went shopping with her on sunday afternoon (with lots of friends) and it was slightly awkward when i first said hello, but as the day went on we got to light chatter, making fun of the show going on in the town square, and talking about the more innocent antics of the party, not once did either of mention what happened between us and we were never really alone to talk. I said bye to everyone as we got off the bus and that was that.

Basically, i'm not sure where to go from here. she is absolutely gorgeous, i'm not too confident about my appearance atm for reasons i wont go into. she hasnt texted me etc (although she is one of the only ones in this friend group that i never got around to getting the number of), do you think she is interested? thats not really the only question i want answers to, i just can't think of what to do from here, she seems very popular and is insanely pretty and to be honest i see myself in a differnt league from her.
meh thats enough from me someone else please say someting

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Reply 1
The best thing that you can do is to bite the bullet and talk to her about what happened. You will never know how she feels about you if you never bring it up again. Get her number from someone and drop her a text.
Where to go..........its pretty obvious........3rd base :wink:

On a serious note,just keep talking to her......if she wants to give you her number then it will happen.
Talk to her...if not you may loose a friend and it may stay awkward
Reply 4
..but what do i say?

Whenever we are together during the daytime (before and after this happened) its normally quite awkward, if her best friend is there she will normally hang back and chat with her quietly, while i'll be involved with the whole group. However when we're both at a party/gathering wotever with alcohol we both get alot more confident, its alot easier to talk to her alone and its only through one of these situations wher i can see anything progressing.

I'm getting the feeling she's ashamed of me.. i dont think its anything i've picked up from her but just the opinion i have of myself at the moment.. (i have v. bad spots atm..) but from what i can remember of the party she wasnt ashamed at all, we were all over eachother on the sofas in the main lounge

mehhh thanks for replies so far, anything you say would hlep
Reply 5
i could easily get her number from a friend.. i could text her on tuesday saying happy christmas and get chatting, or something i guess. please reply!
Reply 6
Cant you meet up with her away from the rest of your friends, maybe get her no. and text her and see if she would like to meet up with you.
Reply 7
Go for it next party you're at with her, or if you can get her mobile number just casually through normal meeting do that, then send a drunk txt in a weeks time or something, to get things going whilst you've been drinking and she's clear minded.

At the end of the day, you're never going to find out by not being daring. I don't know any girls who go for guys who are the shy bashful type. You got to be confident about yourself mate, you've scored with her before, she must find you attractive (I'm guessing she wasn't horrendously drunk..). I know it can be hard to have the self confidence, sometimes it just takes ages to build, but at the end of the day you've gotta go for it at one time or another.

Shes a person...maybe she feels the same. Find something to chat with her about and go for it, you've nothing to lose!

Keep us updated! :smile:
Yeah i agree with mattye about the confidence, it's one of, if not THE most important thing. You must be in her "league" as she got with you. My advice would be keep things moving, if you let things slow down to a stand still you appear to lack confidence and this can be a killer with a girl. Keep it moving at a constant speed and see where it leads. You've gotta get it sorted in your head though that you are worthy of this girl and it's HER that needs to be proving herself to YOU.
Reply 9
i wouldn't try to get her number off some1 else. just wait til u see her have a chat and if u not confident enough to talk to her about it, ask her for her number and if u could call her at some point? then instead of callin just text if u not yet comfortable with it.

cheers,

war
tesh^^
Where to go..........its pretty obvious........3rd base :wink:

On a serious note,just keep talking to her......if she wants to give you her number then it will happen.


Fourth base?
Reply 11
thanks for replies guys

i think if i wait for the next party she'l have gone off me, i dont think theres one for a while (at least until new years..that could be perfect)

she's on holiday with family up north for xmas..you think i could contact her today and get texting? i always like people texting me when i've got no other contact apart from fams, do you think it'll be the same for her?

at the moment i just cant see why someone like her would be slightly interested in me, to be honest 've got loads of spots around the moouth and during the party, despite being drunk, i remember thinking i cant believe we just did that looking like i was :frown: i can hardly stand to look at myself in the mirror. although she has a couple of spots (i like them being there..it reminds me she's human) so do you think she doesnt mind them?

this is going to sound totally ridiculous but what do i text her? 'hello, are you excited about xmas? i still have bloody presents to buy and wrap!! tb ' or something? or do i mention some of the antics of the party to get her thinking about it? there was quite a few memorable events other than the actual incident, e.g drunkenly knocking on peoples doors, accidentally leaving the vodka in the middle of a main road etc that she's mentioned since

any more replies v. helpful
Relax, spots may seem like a big deal, but there not that bad, there's a lot worse things than spots! lol. She probably doesn't even pay much attension to them. And you're probably more attractive than you think you are - most people under-rate themselves. Mattye & DHthe2nd are so right about confidence. Confidence makes people 10 times more attractive...

(I would try to help with what to text, but the wine last night has robbed me of a few brain cells, lol...)
Reply 13
you've picked a great time of year. Just text her on xmas morning, wishing her merry xmas. maybe invite her to a new year's party and look forward to midnight lol.
By the sounds of it, you've got no reason to have such low self-confidence. She clearly likes you.
Good luck - hope it all works out for you.
petrolhead
Where do we go from here?
This isn’t where we intended to be
We had it all, you believed in me
I believed in you.

Madonna spam! L0L!
Reply 15
wel... do you think you have anything to lose? based on what your sayin, you dont talk tht much and so u are not very very gd friends, are you? if so, then go for it, see what happens, as alot have said, you wont get anywhere without being daring.
you could wait for something to happen, but if you think she feels ashamed of you, its not her whos going to make a move, leaving.... i guess you!!
so ask for her number, text her a bit, go out shoppin - without her best friend and stick with her, jsut dont be too pushy or clingy!! then... if all goes well, find an opportunity to either go out sometimes (lunch cuz its informal) and i guess start over from base 1 but when your NOT DRUNK!! gd luck with it!! especially as 'she isnt your league' btw.. same with me!! but mine worked out well, thankfully! hehe
Reply 16
yep she replied, very friendlily, and we're having a text convo now, reminiscing about the party, looking forward to poss. new years partys, etc. although i'm getting the feeling this conversation is too friendly if you know what i mean, like one i'd just have with one of my female friends. how can i verrry subtley hint that i like her? ty.
Reply 17
bump!!
Reply 18
Definitely mention the antics of the party, and if that doesn't get her onto the subject of kissing you then mention it directly yourself. Not in a pushy way, just saying it was nice or something. Fair enough, she might say she was drunk and it was a mistake and then you'll hurt, but I think it's better than dragging this out. And besides, she might actually be shy and want you to mention it, and maybe you'll get to kiss her lots more times.
Reply 19
yep i've mentioned the party a few times, it hasnt really lead onto the subject of what happened. well it did once kindof, but we didnt actually go into it at all. we've literally sent about 20 texts to eachother since i posted this thread, most of it just about how xmas is going, etc. do you think its worth me asking her what she's up to next week or something? i want to hint that i want something more than friendship without being obvious incase i fall flat on my face. ADVICE!