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best jokes... watch

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    anyone got any good jokes to share?
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    Very Important Poster
    (Original post by Sparks17)
    anyone got any good jokes to share?
    My penis was in the Guinness book of world records.

    Then the librarian told me to take it out.
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    Do you like to draw?

    Spoiler:
    Show

    Because I put the D in raw
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    (Original post by UWS)
    My penis was in the Guinness book of world records.

    Then the librarian told me to take it out.
    I can't lie, that's made my day.
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    (Original post by Sparks17)
    anyone got any good jokes to share?
    What do you call a lesbian dinoaur?

    A lickalottapuss!
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    I love how all the jokes so far have been innuendos.
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    What do you call a gay dinasaour?

    A Megasoreass!
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    YOU
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    (Original post by iqra2159)
    YOU
    just slightly rude..
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    (Original post by Kenneye_j)
    What do you call a gay dinasaour?

    A Megasoreass!
    *Face-palm*
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    (Original post by UWS)
    My penis was in the Guinness book of world records.

    Then the librarian told me to take it out.
    That was hilarious :lol::lol::lol:
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    I went to a zoo the other day
    There was only dog there
    It was a Shih Tzu

    This is honestly my favourite joke
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    What do you call a man with a shovel on his head? - Doug.
    What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? - Cliff
    What do you call a man with no arms or legs? - Matt

    What do you call a sheep with no legs? - A cloud
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    I was in the garden the other day painting some fence panels, my neighbour asked if it was my ladder, I replied "no, it's my step ladder".
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    A man walked into a library and asked the librarian for a book on suicide.

    The librarian replied “f*** off, you won’t bring it back”.
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    (Original post by Kevin Hodge)
    A man walked into a library and asked the librarian for a book on suicide.

    The librarian replied “f*** off, you won’t bring it back”.
    Giggity
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    A pregnant lady gets stopped by a robber. The robber tells her "give me everything you have or I'll shoot you three times!"
    The lady replies,"I don't have anything! I'm a single-pregnant woman!"
    So the robber shoots her three times.
    The lady made a full recovery and a few months later she gave birth to triplets, two beautiful girls and one handsome boy.

    One day her daughter came up to her and said, "Mum, Mum! There is something wrong with me! I was peeing and I peed out a bullet!"
    Her mother giggles to herself and tells her daughter, ''No honey, there is nothing wrong with you. When I was pregnant with you and your siblings, I got shot by a robber, but you came out perfectly safe and you're my little miracle child''. Her daughter smiles then leaves.

    A moment after, her second daughter came to her and yelled out, "Mum, Mum, Mum! Take me to the hospital! I was in the restroom peeing and a bullet came out in my pee! I'm scared!"
    Her mother again giggles to herself and says, "No Sweetie. When I was pregnant with you, your sister and brother I got shot by a robber, but nothing happened to you. You're my miracle child". So her daughter smiles at her and leaves the room.

    2 minutes later her son comes yelling at her, "Mum, Mum, Mum!" -His mother cuts him off and says, "I know, I know you were peeing and a bullet came out. You're my miracle child". Her son replies, "No that's not what I was gonna tell you! I was rubbing myself and I think I shot the dog!"
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    I told my friend that she drew her eyebrows on way too high. She looked very surprised.
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    Why was the guitar teacher arrested?
    For fingering a minor.
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    (Original post by (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ)
    A pregnant lady gets stopped by a robber. The robber tells her "give me everything you have or I'll shoot you three times!"
    The lady replies,"I don't have anything! I'm a single-pregnant woman!"
    So the robber shoots her three times.
    The lady made a full recovery and a few months later she gave birth to triplets, two beautiful girls and one handsome boy.

    One day her daughter came up to her and said, "Mum, Mum! There is something wrong with me! I was peeing and I peed out a bullet!"
    Her mother giggles to herself and tells her daughter, ''No honey, there is nothing wrong with you. When I was pregnant with you and your siblings, I got shot by a robber, but you came out perfectly safe and you're my little miracle child''. Her daughter smiles then leaves.

    A moment after, her second daughter came to her and yelled out, "Mum, Mum, Mum! Take me to the hospital! I was in the restroom peeing and a bullet came out in my pee! I'm scared!"
    Her mother again giggles to herself and says, "No Sweetie. When I was pregnant with you, your sister and brother I got shot by a robber, but nothing happened to you. You're my miracle child". So her daughter smiles at her and leaves the room.

    2 minutes later her son comes yelling at her, "Mum, Mum, Mum!" -His mother cuts him off and says, "I know, I know you were peeing and a bullet came out. You're my miracle child". Her son replies, "No that's not what I was gonna tell you! I was rubbing myself and I think I shot the dog!"
    :lolwut:
 
 
 
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