Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    So , I have been living with depression for the recent few years but only started feeling overwhelming anxiety , stress and breakdowns etc in the last year. However , I decided that I could trust my bestfriend and open up a bit to her but i feel like that caused our friendship to be so unstable throughout the year like a rollercoaster going up and down up and down. she seemed to only be there when i was on the verge of suicide but other times she made so many comments that put me down and got angry at me for the smallest things. we have been friends for five years and i cant help but remmeber the good times we had together , i dont know what went wrong .... was it me ? should i have bottled up my depression and not shown my breakdowns? everyday i cry by myself at night because i miss her so much and since she cut me off a few months ago , i seemed to stop eating / barely eating and everything is going in a downwards spiral. why when i know it was a toxic relationship but im still thinking about what i had lost ?
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    Not really sure how to proceed, but I wouldn't mind being your pen pal. Wbu?
    • TSR Support Team
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So , I have been living with depression for the recent few years but only started feeling overwhelming anxiety , stress and breakdowns etc in the last year. However , I decided that I could trust my bestfriend and open up a bit to her but i feel like that caused our friendship to be so unstable throughout the year like a rollercoaster going up and down up and down. she seemed to only be there when i was on the verge of suicide but other times she made so many comments that put me down and got angry at me for the smallest things. we have been friends for five years and i cant help but remmeber the good times we had together , i dont know what went wrong .... was it me ? should i have bottled up my depression and not shown my breakdowns? everyday i cry by myself at night because i miss her so much and since she cut me off a few months ago , i seemed to stop eating / barely eating and everything is going in a downwards spiral. why when i know it was a toxic relationship but im still thinking about what i had lost ?
    I can relate. I had friendships that seemed perfect until real hardship cam along. MH problems are very good at dividing even the closet people.
    The issues you had are to blame- not each other. You got stuck in a nasty situation and it turned out like this.

    It's natural to feel sad after any loss, especially if you relied a lot on somebody. It's not the end of the world though and it's nothing you should beat yourself up over.
    Remember the good times, don't dwell on how things ended and know that there will be more good times to come.

    I hate to sound naggy or like an over attentive mummy, but are you getting any help for your depression?
    I'll just mention a few things. You know if you want to look into it or if you can ignore it.
    Mind,org and sane.org offer some great info and advice for mh issues.
    You can talk to services like samaritans any time you need them free and confidentially.
    You can get some counselling to help you work through things (schools/ colleges/ unis will often have a free service for students).
    You can talk to your GP for advice and support, including the potential of therapy or medication.
    You can chat to other people in support groups like the MHSS here on TSR or see if your area has a support group.

    Bottling things up isn't healthy. Sometimes it can get too much for people or you might not want to talk to people you know about certain things, but you can always vent to a service like samaritans. You are not a burden and you deserve to feel supported and happy.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: October 14, 2017
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Did TEF Bronze Award affect your UCAS choices?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.