Constantly feeling down
I don’t want to post rubbish on here but I have no one to talk to. I have no friends since i finished year 11 because the 2 that I did have went to college and I stayed at sixth form. I miss them so much because even though they weren’t interested in me for the last few months of year 11, they helped me so much from year 7 because I’ve never been good in social positions. I love them and it’s so hard because they have forgotten me. I just can’t make new friends, yeah there’s a few people who I talk to if I’m sat next to them in class but I don’t bother with them out of lessons. It’s really getting to me now and I feel like I’m not going to get anywhere in life (job, friends etc) because I just can’t talk to anyone- as soon as someone talks to me I’m just so awkward. I can’t look at the teacher when they talk to me because I feel so awkward. Whenever I’m out whether it’s in the street or in the corridor I feel like I’m in a bubble and my heart beats faster. I always feel like I need to cry and I manage to hold it back most of the time but if I’m alone and I just want to let it out I can’t. I don’t really know what I’m trying to get out of this and I feel like such an idiot for posting this but I’ve just had enough.
(edited 6 years ago)
I feel the same, I have left college for my gap year and I have like one person I speak to on Facebook.
I would suggest a few things:
Try volunteering in the local area I have found a few friends because of this.
Do some other free time courses where you can meet others who are interested in what you are interested in.
Good Luck
I would suggest a few things:
Try volunteering in the local area I have found a few friends because of this.
Do some other free time courses where you can meet others who are interested in what you are interested in.
Good Luck
At my school we have a counsellor / therapist person who we can talk to with complete confidentiality. If you have someone like that at school it will help so much just to get everything off your chest.
Also I understand it’s difficult to talk to people as I was the same, but it is important to start with small things even if it’s just awkward small talk. It’s the same with everything, practice makes perfect and you’re not going to become a sociable person overnight. Set yourself small, doable goals everyday but don’t put too much stress on yourself!! Your mental well-being is the most important.
Also I understand it’s difficult to talk to people as I was the same, but it is important to start with small things even if it’s just awkward small talk. It’s the same with everything, practice makes perfect and you’re not going to become a sociable person overnight. Set yourself small, doable goals everyday but don’t put too much stress on yourself!! Your mental well-being is the most important.
It’s just so hard. I know it’s part of growing up but I thought that I would i have my friends forever- even though for the last year of school I didn’t feel like I was included and I was just tagging along. I still had 2 people to have some banter with and just chat rubbish on the group chat.
Kinda the same thing here... 3 of my closest friends all went to different colleges. I still have friends in the year, but no one close enough to go out w etc.
Instead of trying to broaden your contacts in your immediate personal area, might i suggest making friends with random people you meet online? Like those people here in the same situation?
In a similar boat as you lot ^^. Spent all of primary alone, and most of high school looking for a group to accept me. Having found one though, I realise during holidays and weekends, when they're busy I often fall into playing games with groups I have met online. Especially those that I have met in sites like this.
What I am trying to say (with a lot of babbling), is that making friends online is a good baseline as you don't have awkward face to face contact, and it will help to deal with your nervous disposition of looking at people.
Speak to me anytime! (My inbox is always empty. True story.) But start small and then think big. Because just going out there and making friends is much more of a task than most people realise!) ^.^
In a similar boat as you lot ^^. Spent all of primary alone, and most of high school looking for a group to accept me. Having found one though, I realise during holidays and weekends, when they're busy I often fall into playing games with groups I have met online. Especially those that I have met in sites like this.
What I am trying to say (with a lot of babbling), is that making friends online is a good baseline as you don't have awkward face to face contact, and it will help to deal with your nervous disposition of looking at people.
Speak to me anytime! (My inbox is always empty. True story.) But start small and then think big. Because just going out there and making friends is much more of a task than most people realise!) ^.^
Original post by mrmotoman20
Instead of trying to broaden your contacts in your immediate personal area, might i suggest making friends with random people you meet online? Like those people here in the same situation?
In a similar boat as you lot ^^. Spent all of primary alone, and most of high school looking for a group to accept me. Having found one though, I realise during holidays and weekends, when they're busy I often fall into playing games with groups I have met online. Especially those that I have met in sites like this.
What I am trying to say (with a lot of babbling), is that making friends online is a good baseline as you don't have awkward face to face contact, and it will help to deal with your nervous disposition of looking at people.
Speak to me anytime! (My inbox is always empty. True story.) But start small and then think big. Because just going out there and making friends is much more of a task than most people realise!) ^.^
In a similar boat as you lot ^^. Spent all of primary alone, and most of high school looking for a group to accept me. Having found one though, I realise during holidays and weekends, when they're busy I often fall into playing games with groups I have met online. Especially those that I have met in sites like this.
What I am trying to say (with a lot of babbling), is that making friends online is a good baseline as you don't have awkward face to face contact, and it will help to deal with your nervous disposition of looking at people.
Speak to me anytime! (My inbox is always empty. True story.) But start small and then think big. Because just going out there and making friends is much more of a task than most people realise!) ^.^
Yeah it would actually be easier to talk to people online. Especially as they wouldn’t have to see how ****ing fat and ugly I am 😂
I've always been the same, ever since I can remember. I'm 24 now and still had friends come and go, I think it's just part of life and growing apart from people who aren't similar-minded.
I had a very best friend in secondary school who I've never really replaced. I have another best friend who took her spot when I left secondary and was always my second best friend and used to live in each other's pockets. Whilst we're still good friends, we hardly see each other now. My other good friends from when I was 18 from college are still good friends but we don't see each other much either - some are married with kids, some are travelling - as we don't go out drinking every week. I made friends at uni and they ended up being b*tchy and pushed me out. One other friend from uni I see a few times a year but not very often.
I now have a boyfriend, who I met through a part-time job I had whilst at uni and he is the bestest friend I've ever had. I'm not saying you need a boyfriend! haha but I'm just saying that you never know where you might find your new best friend in life - and sometimes it just depends where you are in your journey. You'll get there.
I had a very best friend in secondary school who I've never really replaced. I have another best friend who took her spot when I left secondary and was always my second best friend and used to live in each other's pockets. Whilst we're still good friends, we hardly see each other now. My other good friends from when I was 18 from college are still good friends but we don't see each other much either - some are married with kids, some are travelling - as we don't go out drinking every week. I made friends at uni and they ended up being b*tchy and pushed me out. One other friend from uni I see a few times a year but not very often.
I now have a boyfriend, who I met through a part-time job I had whilst at uni and he is the bestest friend I've ever had. I'm not saying you need a boyfriend! haha but I'm just saying that you never know where you might find your new best friend in life - and sometimes it just depends where you are in your journey. You'll get there.
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by glitterphobia
I've always been the same, ever since I can remember. I'm 24 now and still had friends come and go, I think it's just part of life and growing apart from people who aren't similar-minded.
I had a very best friend in secondary school who I've never really replaced. I have another best friend who took her spot when I left secondary and was always my second best friend and used to live in each other's pockets. Whilst we're still good friends, we hardly see each other now. My other good friends from when I was 18 from college are still good friends but we don't see each other much either - some are married with kids, some are travelling - as we don't go out drinking every week. I made friends at uni and they ended up being b*tchy and pushed me out. One other friend from uni I see a few times a year but not very often.
I now have a boyfriend, who I met through a part-time job I had whilst at uni and he is the bestest friend I've ever had. I'm not saying you need a boyfriend! haha but I'm just saying that you never know where you might find your new best friend in life - and sometimes it just depends where you are in your journey. You'll get there.
I had a very best friend in secondary school who I've never really replaced. I have another best friend who took her spot when I left secondary and was always my second best friend and used to live in each other's pockets. Whilst we're still good friends, we hardly see each other now. My other good friends from when I was 18 from college are still good friends but we don't see each other much either - some are married with kids, some are travelling - as we don't go out drinking every week. I made friends at uni and they ended up being b*tchy and pushed me out. One other friend from uni I see a few times a year but not very often.
I now have a boyfriend, who I met through a part-time job I had whilst at uni and he is the bestest friend I've ever had. I'm not saying you need a boyfriend! haha but I'm just saying that you never know where you might find your new best friend in life - and sometimes it just depends where you are in your journey. You'll get there.
I probably couldn’t get a boyfriend even if I wanted one 😂 I know it’s part of growing up but a year ago I couldn’t imaging those 2 not being with me and now I’ve lost them.
Original post by Meg846
ITs not just my social life that’s being affected- I want to be a police officer and progress onto armed police or possibly go into the army’s but how am I meant to do either of those if I can’t speak to people?
Try getting a Saturday job, helped me when I was a shy. Maybe join some clubs at school or even talk to people on here. Everything can help even if its just a little bit.
as a college student, you should aware of the fact that we are all alone. not just only you, everyone you know is alone. people can be friends, but our expectations are far from reality. we were born alone and eventually die alone. nobody will die with you, neither your parents nor your children or husband-wife. you need to learn how to live yourself. then you will get real friends. you are expecting from others so much, if you are looking for friend, be talkative and caring and respect yourself . when people want to talk with you talk them or asking for help them. join school clubs, be an active member. dont give up for the first time.
Original post by Meg846
I probably couldn’t get a boyfriend even if I wanted one 😂 I know it’s part of growing up but a year ago I couldn’t imaging those 2 not being with me and now I’ve lost them.
😂 Don’t worry, neither could I until a couple of years ago. I know the feeling tho, I basically lived with my best friend and then she just left. That was 8 years ago and I still miss her.
But my job was waitressing and that’s how I met my now boyfriend and my closest friends. If you find somewhere where you can have a part time little job to be busy and somewhere where people meet up and see each other outside of work a little bit it might soften the blow of your best friends - maybe!
(edited 6 years ago)
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