I have Aspergers and constantly get myself into a negative state, largely through convincing myself that I 'have no friends'. Someone recently said to me:
"Visualise this in your head. You are sat in a room, in the middle. Each side of you is a person who is your 'friend'. You are talking to them and being quite witty, you are relaxed, happy and chatting away. Around you in a circle are say 30 people who are watching you talking to these 2 other people.
All they do is watch, and say nothing. But what you don't know is what is going on inside their heads. They are following the conversation in their heads, but say or do nothing.
You stop talking, and leave the room. You do not see what happens next.
The two people you were talking to, are happy and say 'I like him, and he's our friend'.
The other 30 people who have been watching you, all stand up and say 'we really like him, he's funny, witty, clever and a wonderful person to be around. We really enjoy being in the same room as him. But we never say anything because we don't know what to say to him. We really like him, we want to say nice things but sometimes when you say something nice, it gets misinterpreted. So we say nothing at all because we don't want him to have hurt feelings.'
You have not seen or heard the reaction from the other 30 people, but they really do like you. It's just that your Aspergers pretty much makes it impossible for you to see that.
What you are experiencing is typical Aspergers trait. I taught a child with Aspergers and he was exactly the same. The most wonderful, likeable person in the whole world yet he thought he had no friends. He did, so many people liked him, but his perception was that he had no friends.'
I found this perspective quite interesting, and just thought that i would pose what they said on here for perspectives. Is their description of people with Aspergers not realising that they are liked true?
Is it true that people can like you without you realising it? Watch
- Thread Starter
- 15-10-2017 22:29
- Thread Starter
- 16-10-2017 01:09