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How to approach crush? Watch

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    I'm in Year 12 and there's a girl at my swimming club who's in Year 11 (doing her GCSE's). I really like her but the problem is

    1) I only swim once a week and only see her then
    2) Her parents are often in the nearby café so I can't talk to her afterwards

    I made a previous thread where I thought perhaps I could just talk to her a few times and ask her number after that, but I need a reason to ask that, right?

    I'm a fairly school-oriented person, so forgive me if I suggest this... but do you think it would be alright if I offer to help her out with her exam revision...

    Spoiler:
    Show

    I really love helping people out and I sent off a bunch of my revision notes to the English department recently (I got 10 A*'s and 3 A's btw).


    ...so that I can get in touch with her / get her contact details, or do you think this would send her the wrong impression that I'm not interested in going out / becoming friends with her? What are your thoughts on how to approach this? I'm aware age difference (though small) might be seen as an issue but I'm not interested in a relationship purely for the sexual side of it.

    P.S. My primary school was single sex (though it isn't anymore), and so is my current grammar school. I've only had a proper experience talking to girls since my school finally allowed girls to come into sixth form from other schools. I've got over my awkwardness and can comfortably hold a conversation anyone (somehow).
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm in Year 12 and there's a girl at my swimming club who's in Year 11 (doing her GCSE's). I really like her but the problem is

    1) I only swim once a week and only see her then
    2) Her parents are often in the nearby café so I can't talk to her afterwards

    I made a previous thread where I thought perhaps I could just talk to her a few times and ask her number after that, but I need a reason to ask that, right?

    I'm a fairly school-oriented person, so forgive me if I suggest this... but do you think it would be alright if I offer to help her out with her exam revision...

    Spoiler:
    Show

    I really love helping people out and I sent off a bunch of my revision notes to the English department recently (I got 10 A*'s and 3 A's btw).


    ...so that I can get in touch with her / get her contact details, or do you think this would send her the wrong impression that I'm not interested in going out / becoming friends with her? What are your thoughts on how to approach this? I'm aware age difference (though small) might be seen as an issue but I'm not interested in a relationship purely for the sexual side of it.

    P.S. My primary school was single sex (though it isn't anymore), and so is my current grammar school. I've only had a proper experience talking to girls since my school finally allowed girls to come into sixth form from other schools. I've got over my awkwardness and can comfortably hold a conversation anyone (somehow).
    I think that's totally fine, that's really sweet. It's a good way to start something going and swap contact details ...I don't think it gives the wrong impression at all. Also it's just an offer, she doesn't have to take it!
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    (Original post by teenstressaddict)
    I think that's totally fine, that's really sweet. It's a good way to start something going and swap contact details ...I don't think it gives the wrong impression at all. Also it's just an offer, she doesn't have to take it!
    Yea, guess so. Although if she declines, I'd mostly be gutted because I have so much revision material that would help her
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yea, guess so. Although if she declines, I'd mostly be gutted because I have so much revision material that would help her
    You won't know until you try...100% go for it, and if she declines it's her loss
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    (Original post by teenstressaddict)
    You won't know until you try...100% go for it, and if she declines it's her loss
    Thanks. I wish I had a few mins to talk to her though, because it's literally that she gets dropped off, goes to change, and then when swimming's over, she goes straight to the cafe where her mum usually is. I guess the only time to ask her that is in the changing rooms.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks. I wish I had a few mins to talk to her though, because it's literally that she gets dropped off, goes to change, and then when swimming's over, she goes straight to the cafe where her mum usually is. I guess the only time to ask her that is in the changing rooms.
    Yeah it's a difficult one, but speaking as someone who's been in both positions (I.e the one scared to talk to the other, and the one who someone's been scared to talk to), once the move is made it's done! Just walk past her when you see her and be like "oh hey i was meaning to say..." keep it casual
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm in Year 12 and there's a girl at my swimming club who's in Year 11 (doing her GCSE's). I really like her but the problem is

    1) I only swim once a week and only see her then
    2) Her parents are often in the nearby café so I can't talk to her afterwards

    I made a previous thread where I thought perhaps I could just talk to her a few times and ask her number after that, but I need a reason to ask that, right?

    I'm a fairly school-oriented person, so forgive me if I suggest this... but do you think it would be alright if I offer to help her out with her exam revision...

    Spoiler:
    Show


    I really love helping people out and I sent off a bunch of my revision notes to the English department recently (I got 10 A*'s and 3 A's btw).



    ...so that I can get in touch with her / get her contact details, or do you think this would send her the wrong impression that I'm not interested in going out / becoming friends with her? What are your thoughts on how to approach this? I'm aware age difference (though small) might be seen as an issue but I'm not interested in a relationship purely for the sexual side of it.

    P.S. My primary school was single sex (though it isn't anymore), and so is my current grammar school. I've only had a proper experience talking to girls since my school finally allowed girls to come into sixth form from other schools. I've got over my awkwardness and can comfortably hold a conversation anyone (somehow).
    How do I say this 🤔. Don't approach her, trust me I know from experience approaching your crush never ends well...
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    (Original post by teenstressaddict)
    Yeah it's a difficult one, but speaking as someone who's been in both positions (I.e the one scared to talk to the other, and the one who someone's been scared to talk to), once the move is made it's done! Just walk past her when you see her and be like "oh hey i was meaning to say..." keep it casual
    I think, I'll ask a few innocent questions about what she does out of school etc. to start the conversation before asking her about revision and for details to stay in touch.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I think, I'll ask a few innocent questions about what she does out of school etc. to start the conversation before asking her about revision and for details to stay in touch.
    Sounds good feel like I'm emotionally invested in this now haha, hope it all goes well!
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    (Original post by Ryanthom100)
    How do I say this 🤔. Don't approach her, trust me I know from experience approaching your crush never ends well...
    As someone above has said, the worst than can happen is they reject my offer. Hardly a nightmare scenario which I can never recover from.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    As someone above has said, the worst than can happen is they reject my offer. Hardly a nightmare scenario which I can never recover from.
    I mean this in the kindest way possible. I hope u get rejected, as if she does give u her number and u talk to her, then she rejects u as it ain't going well, it will be horrible.
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    (Original post by Ryanthom100)
    I mean this in the kindest way possible. I hope u get rejected, as if she does give u her number and u talk to her, then she rejects u as it ain't going well, it will be horrible.
    Erm... how does anyone expect to get into any sort of relationship with those sort of expectations?
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    (Original post by VirgoStrain)
    Erm... how do you expect to get into any sort of relationship with those sort of expectations?
    well having a crush on a girl is different, as it's more painful after rejection. Just go for a girl you find attractive.
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    (Original post by Ryanthom100)
    well having a crush on a girl is different, as it's more painful after rejection. Just go for a girl you find attractive.
    It’s not really a “crush”. I don’t have strong feelings for her, I’m just somewhat interested in her and I think she’s pretty. The last proper crush I can think of was on a girl that left my swimming club a year ago (unfortunately she’s in year 10 now, but looked older). Anyway, i just want to get to know her and see how it goes. I don’t think rejection would really impact me unless I started to develop strong feelings for her.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It’s not really a “crush”. I don’t have strong feelings for her, I’m just somewhat interested in her and I think she’s pretty. The last proper crush I can think of was on a girl that left my swimming club a year ago (unfortunately she’s in year 10 now, but looked older). Anyway, i just want to get to know her and see how it goes. I don’t think rejection would really impact me unless I started to develop strong feelings for her.
    hmm ok, u should go for it then mate. good luck
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    P.S. My primary school was single sex (though it isn't anymore), and so is my current grammar school. I've only had a proper experience talking to girls since my school finally allowed girls to come into sixth form from other schools. I've got over my awkwardness and can comfortably hold a conversation anyone (somehow).
    I’ve just got out of my secondary school (boys only), I’m glad I wasn’t the only one feeling awkward talking to girls. I still am, but I’m happy you got over it, now I gotta start too
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    How do you she needs help?

    What if she got/gets more As than you? What would you say? Uhh, H-h-hi, You look like a dumb bimbo, do you want my help with your revision?
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    (Original post by catacat)
    How do you she needs help?

    What if she got/gets more As than you? What would you say? Uhh, H-h-hi, You look like a dumb bimbo, do you want my help with your revision?
    Can she beat 10 A*’s and 3 A’s though? She’s only doing 11.
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    Could go swimming more than once in a week?

    Or, alternatively, have you got her on any form of Social Media?

    If not, write your number on a bit of paper, screw it up and leave it on the side of the pool within eyeshot, then when you get out pick it up and give it to her and say "I think is yours".

    Job done.
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    (Original post by utr)
    Could go swimming more than once in a week?

    Or, alternatively, have you got her on any form of Social Media?

    If not, write your number on a bit of paper, screw it up and leave it on the side of the pool within eyeshot, then when you get out pick it up and give it to her and say "I think is yours".

    Job done.
    Hmm... that’s weird. I could easily find her social media with her full name, but I’d rather communicate with her using text.
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