Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I see attractive girls around and naturally want to speak to them but I don't cause you see girls all the time say "I don't want to be bothered ew don't talk to me" and I get it but when guys are supposed to pursue and be active in getting dates what can you do? In school and college it was easy to build conversations and relationships naturally but you can't seem to do this in public. How do you get a girlfriend in the 21st century people
    Offline

    6
    ReputationRep:
    Message online if she like you she will build conversation
    • #2
    #2

    Legitimately feel the same, when I go out to bars/clubs the people there are usually just looking for a ONS, never usually leading to anything but the people who are genuine and actually wanting relationships are a struggle to find. I feel like actually approaching someone is so difficult, especially when you don’t know them and half the time you don’t know there situation or whether they are in a relationship already and I don’t want to end up making a fool out of myself... so being single seems like the only option at the moment 😂
    • Very Important Poster
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I see attractive girls around and naturally want to speak to them but I don't cause you see girls all the time say "I don't want to be bothered ew don't talk to me"
    This has probably only happened once to me in my life, it's less common than you think.

    I would say that people have less success when cold approaching than finding them in a place where you have common interests, for example a sports club.

    Take up new hobbies or take up online dating.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Legitimately feel the same, when I go out to bars/clubs the people there are usually just looking for a ONS, never usually leading to anything but the people who are genuine and actually wanting relationships are a struggle to find. I feel like actually approaching someone is so difficult, especially when you don’t know them and half the time you don’t know there situation or whether they are in a relationship already and I don’t want to end up making a fool out of myself... so being single seems like the only option at the moment 😂
    Haha I get you, see a relationship or a ONS is fine by me, but I live at home with parents until next September so the latter is a bit out of the question.
    Agree with you saying about not knowing if people are in relationships, I used to speak to girls in college that I liked then they'd have a boyfriend and it sucked.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by UWS)
    This has probably only happened once to me in my life, it's less common than you think.

    I would say that people have less success when cold approaching than finding them in a place where you have common interests, for example a sports club.

    Take up new hobbies or take up online dating.
    I'm at the gym but naturally it doesn't seem right approaching girls in there given they're there to work out. I have done a couple times but only cause we've smiled or laughed at something, but it never feels right to make a move in that situation.

    Tinder is an option? I've wanted to use it for a while but I'm not a 10/10 so don't expect anyone to want me based off a few pictures and a couple texts.
    Offline

    6
    ReputationRep:
    Not every girls a ten out of ten and your going the right way about the gym thing, but if she seems to need help adjusting the equipment ya swoop in and save the day dont force it though
    • Very Important Poster
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm at the gym but naturally it doesn't seem right approaching girls in there given they're there to work out. I have done a couple times but only cause we've smiled or laughed at something, but it never feels right to make a move in that situation.

    Tinder is an option? I've wanted to use it for a while but I'm not a 10/10 so don't expect anyone to want me based off a few pictures and a couple texts.
    Talk to people, maybe when a girl is using the machine ask to swap with her. Perhaps engage in a little small talk during sets, but I wouldn't rely on it being your source of girls.

    Tinder is an option if you want to get laid quickly. Some relationships do blossom here but not very often.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Emmie LIFE)
    Not every girls a ten out of ten and your going the right way about the gym thing, but if she seems to need help adjusting the equipment ya swoop in and save the day dont force it though
    All the power is with the girl though, guys happily lower their standards with sex, do girls do the same when they could wait for someone else?

    But yeah, a situation can arise. I'm imagining a girl needing help in the gym and like 8 guys going over to help her haha
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by UWS)
    Talk to people, maybe when a girl is using the machine ask to swap with her. Perhaps engage in a little small talk during sets, but I wouldn't rely on it being your source of girls.

    Tinder is an option if you want to get laid quickly. Some relationships do blossom here but not very often.
    You think you can use Tinder living at home? I could never invite a girl back cause my bro lives at home and my parents are never out late at night anymore.
    • Very Important Poster
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You think you can use Tinder living at home? I could never invite a girl back cause my bro lives at home and my parents are never out late at night anymore.
    You could go to her place or book a cheap hotel for the night.
    Offline

    6
    ReputationRep:
    legit they probs will all sweep in, i feel they lower there standards for relationship than for one night stand in a looks kind of way. In that they would be more proud to say the shagged a 10/10 but would happily date a 5/10 if ya get me
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Emmie LIFE)
    legit they probs will all sweep in, i feel they lower there standards for relationship than for one night stand in a looks kind of way. In that they would be more proud to say the shagged a 10/10 but would happily date a 5/10 if ya get me
    Really? Mad that, not the way I'd think but makes sense I suppose. Much rather date a 10/10.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by UWS)
    You could go to her place or book a cheap hotel for the night.
    Probably her place then, are all "encounters" on there at night or daytime too? Haven't used the app so no idea and it'd be easy to just go out for the day instead of coming back late at night then it seems obvious to everyone in the house to what I've been up to.
    Offline

    9
    ReputationRep:
    All you can really do to increase your chances is be attractive and be normal. The cliche advice people will give you is go to "social places" I.e bars, clubs, hobbies etc but the truth is if you're ugly and weird you won't have any luck a time these places either. Think about it, you think if a supermodel walked up to these women at the bus stop and had charm they would refuse to give their numbers ? I doubt it.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Woeful)
    All you can really do to increase your chances is be attractive and be normal. The cliche advice people will give you is go to "social places" I.e bars, clubs, hobbies etc but the truth is if you're ugly and weird you won't have any luck a time these places either. Think about it, you think if a supermodel walked up to these women at the bus stop and had charm they would refuse to give their numbers ? I doubt it.
    I'm normal and I like the way I look in the mirror but given the general lack of female attention in my 18 years I wouldn't say I was that attractive. But then the advice here is just be attractive which is impossible to change really. I'll give Tinder a go but apart from that it looks like I'll be leaving it down to uni next year as I'm on a gap year.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: October 21, 2017
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    What newspaper do you read/prefer?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.