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Could the reason I've never had a boyfriend be because I'm autistic? watch

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    I've never had a boyfriend or been fancied at 16 and I posted a question a few weeks ago about it being because of my appearance but I'm also starting to think it's just because I'm plain weird.

    Ive had trouble making and keeping friends my whole life which I know is because of my autism, and I just thought maybe that's the reason boys don't like me as well.

    My autism doesn't really affect me that much as I try to hide it as much as possible, but there are a few things I can't help at all. I have a really weird voice, I walk and move around weirdly and I don't know if this is because of my autism or Not but I breathe with my mouth open because I feel clostrophobic breathing through my nose. I don't know if people notice these things though, And I really hope they don't or there's no hope for me.
    like I said though, my autism isn't bad. I'm high functioning and I try to hide it as much as possible.

    I'm starting to think that people can tell that there's something wrong with me. My mums constantly on the phone to loads of people about my autism, saying things like " she has autism so she can't do this/can't do that/you can't understand what she's saying/ she's won't know what your saying"
    And also when I was at college these special needs teachers used to literally FOLLOW ME from class to class even though I said not to, and im starting to think that maybe
    It's my autism, that's stopping boys from liking me and not my appearance?

    To be honest I'd rather it be my appearance than my autism, because at least I can still get plastic surgery.
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    (Original post by Ilgsmwamh)
    I've never had a boyfriend or been fancied at 16 and I posted a question a few weeks ago about it being because of my appearance but I'm also starting to think it's just because I'm plain weird.

    Ive had trouble making and keeping friends my whole life which I know is because of my autism, and I just thought maybe that's the reason boys don't like me as well.

    My autism doesn't really affect me that much as I try to hide it as much as possible, but there are a few things I can't help at all. I have a really weird voice, I walk and move around weirdly and I don't know if this is because of my autism or Not but I breathe with my mouth open because I feel clostrophobic breathing through my nose. I don't know if people notice these things though, And I really hope they don't or there's no hope for me.
    like I said though, my autism isn't bad. I'm high functioning and I try to hide it as much as possible.

    I'm starting to think that people can tell that there's something wrong with me. My mums constantly on the phone to loads of people about my autism, saying things like " she has autism so she can't do this/can't do that/you can't understand what she's saying/ she's won't know what your saying"
    And also when I was at college these special needs teachers used to literally FOLLOW ME from class to class even though I said not to, and im starting to think that maybe
    It's my autism, that's stopping boys from liking me and not my appearance?

    To be honest I'd rather it be my appearance than my autism, because at least I can still get plastic surgery.
    nothing to worry about really-you don't sound ridiculously strange
    you should start thinking like this when youre 26 rather than 16
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    It took me a while to find a boyfriend. Yes its harder because im autistic but it just means that your.unique and people dont get it.

    Id say dont worry about it yet because many people dont have a partner at 16 (i mean i didnt) but it doesnt mean you will never get one just wait it out until you find the right guy
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    (Original post by Ilgsmwamh)
    I've never had a boyfriend or been fancied at 16 and I posted a question a few weeks ago about it being because of my appearance but I'm also starting to think it's just because I'm plain weird.

    Ive had trouble making and keeping friends my whole life which I know is because of my autism, and I just thought maybe that's the reason boys don't like me as well.

    My autism doesn't really affect me that much as I try to hide it as much as possible, but there are a few things I can't help at all. I have a really weird voice, I walk and move around weirdly and I don't know if this is because of my autism or Not but I breathe with my mouth open because I feel clostrophobic breathing through my nose. I don't know if people notice these things though, And I really hope they don't or there's no hope for me.
    like I said though, my autism isn't bad. I'm high functioning and I try to hide it as much as possible.

    I'm starting to think that people can tell that there's something wrong with me. My mums constantly on the phone to loads of people about my autism, saying things like " she has autism so she can't do this/can't do that/you can't understand what she's saying/ she's won't know what your saying"
    And also when I was at college these special needs teachers used to literally FOLLOW ME from class to class even though I said not to, and im starting to think that maybe
    It's my autism, that's stopping boys from liking me and not my appearance?

    To be honest I'd rather it be my appearance than my autism, because at least I can still get plastic surgery.
    Well, I'm an autistic 16-year-old who's never had a girlfriend...

    Autism is just a label. I don't exhibit many of the traits that are associated with autism. Many neurotypical people exhibit a few of those traits. Virtually no students at college (other than those who knew me in secondary school when my differences were far more obvious) even know I have autism, and for all you know, people might not know you have it either.

    16 is still pretty young. Not that many of my friends have been in a relationship (I'd say 50% at the most, although I don't tend to hang around with the "popular" kids), and many of those who have been in one regret it! A relationship has never been a priority for me, so don't feel like you have to be in one.

    Please tell your mum to stop saying these things. People change. 5-10 years ago, I couldn't really understand things like idioms and sarcasm. Now I'm normally the one using them. If you're trying to appear normal (which is totally understandable), she isn't doing you any favours.

    As for those special-needs teachers, I can totally relate. I hated it. The whole system is a joke - initially I was given 20 hours of week of support (I don't know how that even works since I only have 18 hours a week of lessons in sixth form) but I declined it and asked for just a single short one-to-one session each week to make sure I'm OK (and to be honest, I don't think I even need that). Same with extra time in exams. Apparently just because I'm autistic, I have 25% extra time in exams, even though I finish most of my exams in about half the given time. Pester them to stop following you around and try to explain to them that you don't want to appear different.
 
 
 
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