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Do you think that these people are my friends? Watch

  • View Poll Results: Do you think that these people are my friends?
    Person 1 is my friend but Person 2 isn't.
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    Person 2 is my friend but Person 1 isn't.
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    Both people are my friends.
    12
    92.31%
    Neither person is my friend.
    1
    7.69%

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    I recently got some messages on social media from some people who I knew from a few years ago. I have Aspergers and struggle a lot to interpret messages like thie because of the effects of this on me I also tend to overanalyse messages and most of the time reach the wrong conclusions. Please can I have some advise as to whether you think these people are my friends or not?

    The first message from Person 1 said:

    'First of all you need to chill. You are not a retard. The dictionary definition does not apply to you because you are social and you know how to interact with people. Only you can change your loneliness. Throw caution to the wind. Join a club/society. Ignore those who insult you - you have dealt with worse at school. If you think you have no friends then you are wrong. Look up the definition of friend in a dictionary and apply it to people you know. It's not all about uni work. You need to put yourself out there and friends will come your way.'

    and the second message from Person 2 said:

    'Just because you don't always talk to friends doesn't mean they aren't always there for you. Also, please never assume a person doesn't care about you just because they haven't told you so... I hope today has made you realise how many friends you have '.

    I haven't saw either of these people for quite a long time now, although the messages are both fairly recent. Do you think that the people who sent me these messages are my friends? In particular, what is the significance of the ellipsis in the second message? Also, in the first message, I haven't saw this person for a few years now, so how can they so confidently say 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong'?
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    Both people seem to care for you, and seem to consider themselves as your friends. I think that's implied by the confident statement of Person 1 and the ellipsis in the second message (Person 2 cares about you, even though they haven't told you so). At least that's how I would understand these messages without any further context
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    (Original post by Tomm98)
    I recently got some messages on social media from some people who I knew from a few years ago. I have Aspergers and struggle a lot to interpret messages like thie because of the effects of this on me I also tend to overanalyse messages and most of the time reach the wrong conclusions. Please can I have some advise as to whether you think these people are my friends or not?

    The first message from Person 1 said:

    'First of all you need to chill. You are not a retard. The dictionary definition does not apply to you because you are social and you know how to interact with people. Only you can change your loneliness. Throw caution to the wind. Join a club/society. Ignore those who insult you - you have dealt with worse at school. If you think you have no friends then you are wrong. Look up the definition of friend in a dictionary and apply it to people you know. It's not all about uni work. You need to put yourself out there and friends will come your way.'

    and the second message from Person 2 said:

    'Just because you don't always talk to friends doesn't mean they aren't always there for you. Also, please never assume a person doesn't care about you just because they haven't told you so... I hope today has made you realise how many friends you have '.

    I haven't saw either of these people for quite a long time now, although the messages are both fairly recent. Do you think that the people who sent me these messages are my friends? In particular, what is the significance of the ellipsis in the second message? Also, in the first message, I haven't saw this person for a few years now, so how can they so confidently say 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong'?
    I'm pretty sure they are friendly people and are looking out for you. They just want to let you know that you have plenty of friends who can help you, even if you don't see them as your friend.
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    (Original post by Tomm98)
    I recently got some messages on social media from some people who I knew from a few years ago. I have Aspergers and struggle a lot to interpret messages like thie because of the effects of this on me I also tend to overanalyse messages and most of the time reach the wrong conclusions. Please can I have some advise as to whether you think these people are my friends or not?

    The first message from Person 1 said:

    'First of all you need to chill. You are not a retard. The dictionary definition does not apply to you because you are social and you know how to interact with people. Only you can change your loneliness. Throw caution to the wind. Join a club/society. Ignore those who insult you - you have dealt with worse at school. If you think you have no friends then you are wrong. Look up the definition of friend in a dictionary and apply it to people you know. It's not all about uni work. You need to put yourself out there and friends will come your way.'

    and the second message from Person 2 said:

    'Just because you don't always talk to friends doesn't mean they aren't always there for you. Also, please never assume a person doesn't care about you just because they haven't told you so... I hope today has made you realise how many friends you have '.

    I haven't saw either of these people for quite a long time now, although the messages are both fairly recent. Do you think that the people who sent me these messages are my friends? In particular, what is the significance of the ellipsis in the second message? Also, in the first message, I haven't saw this person for a few years now, so how can they so confidently say 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong'?
    A good friend does not need to talk to you often or every day. A good friend remembers past conversations. Plainly, these people care about you being happy, and they want you to know that lots of people go through this to some degree. For example, I constantly ask people "do you hate me?" Because I feel like an outcast and am unsure if people. Lots of people do this. The ellipsis has no significance, it's a grammatical error.
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    They both seem to care in some way or another. Person 2, to me, comes off as a bit more abrasive, but not something I'd worry about, they're probably just a bit more blunt than other people.

    As for the "I haven't saw this person for a few years now, so how can they so confidently say 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong'?". It's pretty rare to be in a position where you quite literally have no friends. Sometimes you've just got to dig a bit deeper to remember those friends that you don't see as often as others.
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    (Original post by TheMcSame)
    They both seem to care in some way or another. Person 2, to me, comes off as a bit more abrasive, but not something I'd worry about, they're probably just a bit more blunt than other people.

    As for the "I haven't saw this person for a few years now, so how can they so confidently say 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong'?". It's pretty rare to be in a position where you quite literally have no friends. Sometimes you've just got to dig a bit deeper to remember those friends that you don't see as often as others.
    What do you think the 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong' means?
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    (Original post by Tomm98)
    What do you think the 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong' means?
    he/she is just saying that you have friends, and you shouldn't think that you don't have any friends - because you do.
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    Both messages seem to come from a place of care. You've not seen them a long time so I dunno if I'd consider them friends, but the messages were friendly.
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    (Original post by It's****ingWOODY)
    Both messages seem to come from a place of care. You've not seen them a long time so I dunno if I'd consider them friends, but the messages were friendly.
    How often do you have to speak to people you knew (e.g. from School) for them to remain friends?
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    (Original post by Tomm98)
    How often do you have to speak to people you knew (e.g. from School) for them to remain friends?
    It doesn't matter. I have a friend I may see once a year. (he lives in London, I live in Plymouth) We can go weeks without talking. But he's still a friend of mine.
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    What does 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong' mean if I haven't saw this person or been in touch besides Facebook occasionally. How can they say that I have friends here - I told them how lonely I was.
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    I think that everyone hates me and will never want to speak to me again.
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    You need to stop overthinking everything.
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    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    You need to stop overthinking everything.
    It's just so hard for me - I can't just do it like that. I wish I has lots of friends.

    What does 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong' mean if I haven't saw this person or been in touch besides Facebook occasionally. How can they say that I have friends here - I told them how lonely I was.
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    Please could I have some more perspectives on this?
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    (Original post by Tomm98)
    What do you think the 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong' means?
    As I said before, sometimes you've just got to dig a bit deeper to remember those friends that you don't see as often as others. To me, that's what it means.
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    (Original post by TheMcSame)
    As I said before, sometimes you've just got to dig a bit deeper to remember those friends that you don't see as often as others. To me, that's what it means.
    Do you think that the person who said it is my friend?
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    (Original post by Tomm98)
    Do you think that the person who said it is my friend?
    That's something that's up to you really. I don't know if they are or not, they seem to care, but as a complete stranger, I can't really say two people are friends without knowing anything about either of them or their relationship with each other...
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    (Original post by Fishie)
    Both people seem to care for you, and seem to consider themselves as your friends. I think that's implied by the confident statement of Person 1 and the ellipsis in the second message (Person 2 cares about you, even though they haven't told you so). At least that's how I would understand these messages without any further context
    (Original post by most111)
    I'm pretty sure they are friendly people and are looking out for you. They just want to let you know that you have plenty of friends who can help you, even if you don't see them as your friend.
    (Original post by Zozo*)
    A good friend does not need to talk to you often or every day. A good friend remembers past conversations. Plainly, these people care about you being happy, and they want you to know that lots of people go through this to some degree. For example, I constantly ask people "do you hate me?" Because I feel like an outcast and am unsure if people. Lots of people do this. The ellipsis has no significance, it's a grammatical error.
    (Original post by TheMcSame)
    They both seem to care in some way or another. Person 2, to me, comes off as a bit more abrasive, but not something I'd worry about, they're probably just a bit more blunt than other people.

    As for the "I haven't saw this person for a few years now, so how can they so confidently say 'if you think you have no friends then you are wrong'?". It's pretty rare to be in a position where you quite literally have no friends. Sometimes you've just got to dig a bit deeper to remember those friends that you don't see as often as others.
    (Original post by tbeyan)
    he/she is just saying that you have friends, and you shouldn't think that you don't have any friends - because you do.
    (Original post by It's****ingWOODY)
    Both messages seem to come from a place of care. You've not seen them a long time so I dunno if I'd consider them friends, but the messages were friendly.
    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    It doesn't matter. I have a friend I may see once a year. (he lives in London, I live in Plymouth) We can go weeks without talking. But he's still a friend of mine.
    When Person 1 said 'you need to put yourself out there and friends will come your way', does that suggests that they do not consider me as one of their friends, as it is quite passive?
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    When Person 1 said 'you need to put yourself out there and friends will come your way', does that suggests that they do not consider me as one of their friends, as it is quite passive?
 
 
 
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