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Quit uni for my parents Watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    Yes is maybe I am blaming them but I doubt anyone would be happy or willing to leave their own family for anything plus ppl in society lockdown upon you if you're al alone I think imagine you get in an accident or whatever and there's no-one...its a sh*tty situation to be In unfortunately
    You have a choice to make then. Stick with your parents, or leave and over time they will forgive you. And if they do not forgive you, do you want to be trapped your entire life?
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    (Original post by stoyfan)
    Well that not what actually happens.

    If you go to uni, you will still see your parents if you choose to do so.
    ...
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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    I wish it were that simple but that is the issue they are against me going to uni altogether and have clearly stated if I go on dead to them
    Well they aren't really great parents. It seems that they are just trying to pull of the stops to persuade you not to go; however, I do not believe they are going to cut contact from you.

    It may be hard for a parent seeing their children leaving their homes for uni, but they will get over it.
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    What uni and course did you apply for?I feel like you wasted your potential.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What uni and course did you apply for?I feel like you wasted your potential.
    I think she was doing law at some top uni
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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    Hi so some time ago I posted with a question that my parents didn't want me to go uni and I wanted but if i did they'd disown me well I've decided to finally quit uni and stay with my parents well because fear of loneliness got the best of me and also they've quite scared me by saying I'll be alone in the future and rot here and there but then I'll be alone with no-one by my side
    Are you Asian?
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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    Marriage rather than education sincevim girl that should be my life goal according to them
    This is just sad. Your parents are clearly stuck in the 19th century. Now, I understand that being half-Asian myself, the Asian way seems to be "your elders are always right". But they aren't always right. Of course, if you would rather get married and become a housewife, that's your choice, but remember that many marriages (I think it's now about half in the UK) end in divorce. A degree lasts longer than that.
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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    Hi so some time ago I posted with a question that my parents didn't want me to go uni and I wanted but if i did they'd disown me well I've decided to finally quit uni and stay with my parents well because fear of loneliness got the best of me and also they've quite scared me by saying I'll be alone in the future and rot here and there but then I'll be alone with no-one by my side
    :hugs: I'm sorry you've had to make this decision and I appreciate your reasoning. I'd also like to apologise for what I'm about to say as it may sound harsh

    But honestly, if your family have threatened to disown you simply because you want to go to uni and get a good qualification then... erm... they're not really worthy of being called that IMO

    Now, I can appreciate that you can't think of anywhere you'd turn e.g for support, but just be aware that you will meet like-minded, ambitious people at university, and make many new friends as well. And don't forget that, every step of the way, there are support networks in place to ensure that you have everything you need. Plus, you'll be able to enjoy some freedom instead of being controlled by people who clearly don't have your best interests at heart.

    I hope things work out well for you, but I'd certainly urge you to have a rethink. I mean, you don't want to turn around, say, 5 years down the line and think 'my life could've been so much else if I'd have been brave on that one occasion'.

    All the best!
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    (Original post by MariaMay)
    Are you Asian?
    Yes
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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    Hi so some time ago I posted with a question that my parents didn't want me to go uni and I wanted but if i did they'd disown me well I've decided to finally quit uni and stay with my parents well because fear of loneliness got the best of me and also they've quite scared me by saying I'll be alone in the future and rot here and there but then I'll be alone with no-one by my side
    Did you commute to uni?
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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    Hi so some time ago I posted with a question that my parents didn't want me to go uni and I wanted but if i did they'd disown me well I've decided to finally quit uni and stay with my parents well because fear of loneliness got the best of me and also they've quite scared me by saying I'll be alone in the future and rot here and there but then I'll be alone with no-one by my side
    So you have decided to care for your parents for the rest of your life? what is about your job perspectives? I appreciate this sacrifice for your parents, but you should go on for yourself and go to uni (or do an apprenticeship at least) to acquire the educaiton you need to earn money to finance your livelihood. You have not to leave your parents forever, you can still meet them in your holidays, or study in a city which is not too far away to your parent's home to be close to them.
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    lol every single Asian parent tries to force their child INTO going to uni? No? I've never seen parents who don;t want their child to become a civilised person. I have Asian parents and they believe success is very important so that people can have respect for you in society.............. girl or boy.
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    (Original post by ineedthosegrades)
    lol every single Asian parent tries to force their child INTO going to uni? No? I've never seen parents who don;t want their child to become a civilised person. I have Asian parents and they believe success is very important so that people can have respect for you in society.............. girl or boy.
    Not quite some parents typically Indian or Pakistani want the girl to get married and have family rather than pursuing further education
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    (Original post by Kallisto)
    So you have decided to care for your parents for the rest of your life? what is about your job perspectives? I appreciate this sacrifice for your parents, but you should go on for yourself and go to uni (or do an apprenticeship at least) to acquire the educaiton you need to earn money to finance your livelihood. You have not to leave your parents forever, you can still meet them in your holidays, or study in a city which is not too far away to your parent's home to be close to them.
    They've outright refused to let me go I proposed I come home for the weekends as it's not that far but he said no thisbisnt a hotel if you leave you live your life on your own and you don't see us again
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    I am a parent of girls who have gone to university. Their home town is very limited in opportunities so I have to expect and accept that they may well want to move elsewhere.

    I respect and attempt to embrace all cultures. I have visited Asia several times and have loved the experience.

    However I feel that if parents make the decision to live in a Western culture they have to understand that their children may have different priorities.

    I feel that it is my responsibility as a parent to ensure that they do not feel that I am dependent on them. I gave birth to my daughters, that was my choice not theirs. My motivation for having children was not in order to have company in years to come. I feel for the OP and want to encourage her to follow her own dreams and not to feel an obligation to her parents.
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    (Original post by ollienbert)
    I am a parent of girls who have gone to university. Their home town is very limited in opportunities so I have to expect and accept that they may well want to move elsewhere.

    I respect and attempt to embrace all cultures. I have visited Asia several times and have loved the experience.

    However I feel that if parents make the decision to live in a Western culture they have to understand that their children may have different priorities.

    I feel that it is my responsibility as a parent to ensure that they do not feel that I am dependent on them. I gave birth to my daughters, that was my choice not theirs. My motivation for having children was not in order to have company in years to come. I feel for the OP and want to encourage her to follow her own dreams and not to feel an obligation to her parents.
    Thank you insist my parents were as open minded
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    When you getting married and becoming a father/mother? - Because that's the can of worms you have opened by taking this decision.

    What else are you going to sacrifice for your family? :/ bleh.

    Your lack of belief/ strength in yourself has been buried. Say goodbye to your own happiness - this is the new reality to your existence now, well this is how it starts....

    You are a human being and you have rights which include a right to say no and access to freedom. You are unaware of the implications this decision has on your actual self as a person.

    Your own fears are holding you back, not your family.
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    I have one question. Why do your Parents not want you to go to UNI?
    -Maybe there is a good reason why.
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    I remember your thread. Are you still going along wit that arranged marriage to that guy you don't like?
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    (Original post by Anonymous7901)
    Thank you insist my parents were as open minded
    I know this is going to sound weird, but as a South Asian Male, I would want my future wife/partner to be higher educated. I feel that it makes the relationship stronger, and that both parties are able to provide higher amounts of money towards the family, rather than the (traditional) idea of the father being the breadwinner. I wouldn't want my wife to be a housewife (something that my mother had passed down from her experiences) life doesn't work like that anymore, and neither do a lot of other friends and family from Asian descent.
 
 
 
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