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    Hi guys,
    So I commute to uni and I'm finding it pretty difficult to talk to people and make friends. There's probably about 10-20 people on my course that live with parents, or I guess I'd classify as 'commuters' (live not in student accommodation) but a lot of them seemed to have made friends.

    It's just kinda hard because I go into a lecture where we do work and then I leave the lecture for lunch and everyone sort of goes off in different groups and I just kinda wonder round the area on my own.
    A few of my mates back home that commute said they're finding it difficult too but even they've made a couple of friends. I literally try to talk and joke with people in lectures but then it just stays in lectures and there's nothing else I don't know what to do! Is it normal to take a while?

    There's a few people on the course that I've identified are pretty introverted and don't really talk to people (I've tried talking to them cos I figured I'd fit in with them individually but it's hard to like keep a convo idk). Am I just overreacting?
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    Try and do some activities like joining clubs and stuff, that's an easy way to make friends.
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    (Original post by SofiaTW)
    Try and do some activities like joining clubs and stuff, that's an easy way to make friends.
    My uni has little societies that I'm interested in really, it's a pretty small uni.
    I also have to get up at 6am for commute so to be honest when the uni day is done I am knackered
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    Then I would suggest trying to make conversation with people out of your comfort zone, and ask if they'd like to grab a coffee or some sort.
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    (Original post by SRDW)
    My uni has little societies that I'm interested in really, it's a pretty small uni.
    I also have to get up at 6am for commute so to be honest when the uni day is done I am knackered
    What kind of things are you interested in? University normally has a great number of societies, I am sure there must be something for you. If you aren't 100% interested, it doesn't hurt to try, and you get to meet more people this way.

    Does your department has its own society? You could also look at volunteering in your spare time? Your union should have a list of placements.
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    Have you tried friending people from your uni on social media? Maybe even suggesting a group chat for your course.
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    Go to the lectures early and socialise with people before you go in
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    Try and talk to anyone about anything! I got into a conversation with a girl by saying I liked her jumper. Also, there’ll be plenty of people who feel the same way as you. Before lectures look out for people who are standing on their own and start a conversation, they’ll be happy to have someone to talk to
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    (Original post by SRDW)
    Hi guys,
    So I commute to uni and I'm finding it pretty difficult to talk to people and make friends. There's probably about 10-20 people on my course that live with parents, or I guess I'd classify as 'commuters' (live not in student accommodation) but a lot of them seemed to have made friends.

    It's just kinda hard because I go into a lecture where we do work and then I leave the lecture for lunch and everyone sort of goes off in different groups and I just kinda wonder round the area on my own.
    A few of my mates back home that commute said they're finding it difficult too but even they've made a couple of friends. I literally try to talk and joke with people in lectures but then it just stays in lectures and there's nothing else I don't know what to do! Is it normal to take a while?

    There's a few people on the course that I've identified are pretty introverted and don't really talk to people (I've tried talking to them cos I figured I'd fit in with them individually but it's hard to like keep a convo idk). Am I just overreacting?
    I’m in exact same. I just transferred to a new uni and don’t have accommodation yet. So I’m behind with all the work, missed freshers and don’t have any friends. I just go to lectures, then go home. I hate it. Everyday I’m on the train and I just cry. Wish I could just start the whole year over!!
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    In your position SRDW I would (if you could afford it) consider seeing if there are any places in Halls freeing up as people drop out? Although this is a massive gamble as the place might be free due to horrendous flatmates! And you might feel that people have cliqued off.

    To be blunt I think you will never have the same uni experience commuting.
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    (Original post by Wimbs)
    In your position SRDW I would (if you could afford it) consider seeing if there are any places in Halls freeing up as people drop out? Although this is a massive gamble as the place might be free due to horrendous flatmates! And you might feel that people have cliqued off.

    To be blunt I think you will never have the same uni experience commuting.
    You have to remember that this is only first year. Most of the 'friends' you'll make are fake anyway. I'm studying in London so it may not be relatable to non-Londoners but I'm a 4th year now and plenty of people in my year commute. The number of people who lived further out/moved back home has increased steadily through the years since first year and we're all still perfectly good friends. The 'uni experience' is different for everyone.

    OP, I know you get tired but try societies if you can. People on your course may become good friends, or just friends of convenience. You have a stronger chance of getting genuine friends if they are through a society or common interest.
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    (Original post by Volibear)
    You have to remember that this is only first year. Most of the 'friends' you'll make are fake anyway. I'm studying in London so it may not be relatable to non-Londoners but I'm a 4th year now and plenty of people in my year commute. The number of people who lived further out/moved back home has increased steadily through the years since first year and we're all still perfectly good friends. The 'uni experience' is different for everyone.

    OP, I know you get tired but try societies if you can. People on your course may become good friends, or just friends of convenience. You have a stronger chance of getting genuine friends if they are through a society or common interest.
    I go to a London uni too!
    Yeah, I could attend societies but my uni is quite small and only have 6 lectures, most of them (if not all) I'm not interested in.
    I've joined the uni group chat and getting to know the names of people and join the convo on there, but still filters out in lectures. I guess I'll take your advice and wait it out perhaps.
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    Hi, everyone one thing you need to know is that Make sure you move with good friends, Try to study the kind of friends you want to move with know the type of friends you want to move with, if you have done this then, Take the plunge and say hello

    University is a time in your life where it is totally acceptable to strike up a conversation with a stranger. If this is completely out of your comfort zone, start by talking to someone who sits next to you in a lecture or seminar. You will already have something to talk about, as you are both on the same course, so ask them about a reading list or which module they are most looking forward to.

    Get involved

    The choice of events, clubs and societies at university is endless. Make the most of freshers’ week and sign up to a range of activities – you can be as adventurous as you like, as there are often new things to try, and many clubs allow you a trial session before you sign up. This is a great way to meet new people and develop a common interest

    Study groups

    After seminars or tutorials, suggest to a couple of people that you form a study group – getting together once a week to go over lecture notes and reading lists can be a great way to make new friends and get some academic help at the same time.

    Making a new set of friends can seem like a daunting prospect at first, but it helps to remember that everyone’s in the same boat. Dive in with enthusiasm, and you might find that in a week or so, you can’t imagine why you were ever worried in the first place.
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    Hi! I would suggest that you persevere with the more introverted people. They probably just need to spend some more time with you before they open up. Why don't you invite them for coffee or a drink? The fact that you have made the effort to do this should show them you value their company and help put them at ease. A lot of introverted people actually have a lot to say, they are just overly self-conscious about appearing boring or about bothering other people that they don't put themselves out there. Or, indeed, they are scared about being rejected so protect themselves by not trying to make friends. You could be the understandig person they are waiting for!
 
 
 
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