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Risk of losing my job and getting kicked out of sixth form Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Hi all

    I’m hoping some of you can relate to my current situation & can offer me some guidance . For the past 4 or 5 months, my mood has been increasingly flattened and I am at the stage where all my motivation and drive has disappeared. I am currently in Year 13 and this means I’ve decided I don’t want to apply to uni & I’m desperately trying to find an alternative, however absolutely nothing seems to light up any spark inside of me :/

    As a result of this I don’t feel a drive to get good grades anymore and my first term this year hasn’t been good to say the least, with scores averaging below 50% for each subject. Being a prestigious grammar school, they have threatened to take away my free periods & ultimately suggest I should leave if I cannot improve.

    A similar problem at work has lead to me being given an official warning as I am underperforming and letting my entire department down & therefore if I don’t improve I’m at risk of losing my job.

    Both school and my manager have suggested I see a doctor but I know from experience I’ll just be told to take antidepressants but I’m not sure I like the idea of becoming dependent on drugs, so I was hoping somebody on here could relate and maybe point me in the direction of some other kind of therapy or inspiration (I am aware therapy is available on the NHS but I can’t afford to wait that long considering my school place and job are on the line)

    Thank you
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    Sounds like a tough situation. I never was at the risk of losing anything because of my depression, or "laziness" as some call it. I'm not sure what caused you to feel like this, but through experience, there's ALWAYS something that ends up triggering it. And it's quite unfortunate. It's important to try to remain positive, firstly: (I am assuming) you're healthy and do not have any problems. There are literally children who live no longer than 12 years and end up dying of a horrible cancer or disease, leaving their parents forever crippled with their loss. Secondly: it could be so much worse. You have a JOB. There are people who are homeless on the streets begging for a way in. You just need to put some more effort into it, perhaps. Try doing unique things as much as possible: meet new people, go to places you never thought you'd go before. Help out, make people feel better, donate to charity, always be nice to people. All these things can really boost your mood and make you a happier person in return, which can also boost your mood and your level of depression or sadness can lower down and allow you to keep going. I'd also advise you to have big goals. It's better to leave disappointed than to not try at all, or at least in my opinion. FORCE yourself to do things. Give yourself a 3 second rule to do things. Be more active, but not to the point of extreme exhaustion (I know this, also from the past). Try to work out and get your heart rate pumping maybe 1 hour every 2 days so that you can be fit and full of energy. Have showers in the morning too, also go for cold showers if it gets your energy up. Find some friends to have fun with. Just always make sure that you're doing something so that you never get alone time to think about the bad things going on in your life. Find something to be passionate about and talk to people constantly about it. Nothing ever gets me more energised than to give a 10 minute speech about why, for example, Batman is the best. Listen to people who give inspirational speeches and find a role model that you can look up to. Listen to music that brings your mood UP such as rock, this will encourage you to do crazy things (lol). Dance around in your house to music. If you're not religious, try following a religion and pray to God: thank Him for all the bad AND good things in your life, and ask him to help you - whether it'd be motivation or happiness (or both). Give your absolute best to try and change things and things WILL change. It REALLY sucks to be in a situation where you don't care about anything. There's also the other horrible situation where you care WAY too much about things. You need to be in the middle. Talk to your parents and visit the doctor. It's better to get help than to get nothing at all. Also talk to your friends. I find myself more comfortable talking to my friends than my parents, somehow. I just haven't established a rather close relationship with my parents as much as I would with a friend. Anyway, never give up and follow your dreams, no matter how high they are. Always do it. Should you have any more questions, I am more than happy to help.
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    (Original post by Germanyisthebest)
    Sounds like a tough situation. I never was at the risk of losing anything because of my depression, or "laziness" as some call it. I'm not sure what caused you to feel like this, but through experience, there's ALWAYS something that ends up triggering it. And it's quite unfortunate. It's important to try to remain positive, firstly: (I am assuming) you're healthy and do not have any problems. There are literally children who live no longer than 12 years and end up dying of a horrible cancer or disease, leaving their parents forever crippled with their loss. Secondly: it could be so much worse. You have a JOB. There are people who are homeless on the streets begging for a way in. You just need to put some more effort into it, perhaps. Try doing unique things as much as possible: meet new people, go to places you never thought you'd go before. Help out, make people feel better, donate to charity, always be nice to people. All these things can really boost your mood and make you a happier person in return, which can also boost your mood and your level of depression or sadness can lower down and allow you to keep going. I'd also advise you to have big goals. It's better to leave disappointed than to not try at all, or at least in my opinion. FORCE yourself to do things. Give yourself a 3 second rule to do things. Be more active, but not to the point of extreme exhaustion (I know this, also from the past). Try to work out and get your heart rate pumping maybe 1 hour every 2 days so that you can be fit and full of energy. Have showers in the morning too, also go for cold showers if it gets your energy up. Find some friends to have fun with. Just always make sure that you're doing something so that you never get alone time to think about the bad things going on in your life. Find something to be passionate about and talk to people constantly about it. Nothing ever gets me more energised than to give a 10 minute speech about why, for example, Batman is the best. Listen to people who give inspirational speeches and find a role model that you can look up to. Listen to music that brings your mood UP such as rock, this will encourage you to do crazy things (lol). Dance around in your house to music. If you're not religious, try following a religion and pray to God: thank Him for all the bad AND good things in your life, and ask him to help you - whether it'd be motivation or happiness (or both). Give your absolute best to try and change things and things WILL change. It REALLY sucks to be in a situation where you don't care about anything. There's also the other horrible situation where you care WAY too much about things. You need to be in the middle. Talk to your parents and visit the doctor. It's better to get help than to get nothing at all. Also talk to your friends. I find myself more comfortable talking to my friends than my parents, somehow. I just haven't established a rather close relationship with my parents as much as I would with a friend. Anyway, never give up and follow your dreams, no matter how high they are. Always do it. Should you have any more questions, I am more than happy to help.
    It's important for people to see the bigger picture but I really don't think guilt-tripping them is going to help. Sadness is not a competition.
    • #2
    #2

    It sounds to me like you're doing too much. You work and study - where's the time for relaxing?
    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi all

    I’m hoping some of you can relate to my current situation & can offer me some guidance . For the past 4 or 5 months, my mood has been increasingly flattened and I am at the stage where all my motivation and drive has disappeared. I am currently in Year 13 and this means I’ve decided I don’t want to apply to uni & I’m desperately trying to find an alternative, however absolutely nothing seems to light up any spark inside of me :/

    As a result of this I don’t feel a drive to get good grades anymore and my first term this year hasn’t been good to say the least, with scores averaging below 50% for each subject. Being a prestigious grammar school, they have threatened to take away my free periods & ultimately suggest I should leave if I cannot improve.

    A similar problem at work has lead to me being given an official warning as I am underperforming and letting my entire department down & therefore if I don’t improve I’m at risk of losing my job.

    Both school and my manager have suggested I see a doctor but I know from experience I’ll just be told to take antidepressants but I’m not sure I like the idea of becoming dependent on drugs, so I was hoping somebody on here could relate and maybe point me in the direction of some other kind of therapy or inspiration (I am aware therapy is available on the NHS but I can’t afford to wait that long considering my school place and job are on the line)

    Thank you
    I completely understand what you are saying. Although tbh, maybe it's worth giving the medications a go? Up to you obviously, but this is clearly impairing your current functioning.
 
 
 
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