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Feeling guilty about being a bully in middle school... Watch

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    I am in high school now but can’t let go of the guilt of what I had done in 7th grade. So basically, I had a friend who was very nice and I was extremely close with, named Sarah. I was also close friends with another girl named Lisa (using fake names). Sarah didn’t like Lisa and constantly talked about not liking her. At one point I also became upset at Lisa and decided to talk sh*t about her with Sarah. Later on, when my anger wore off, me and Lisa no longer were as close any more so in order to gain attention from her, I told her all the stuff that Sarah had said about her. This lead Lisa and Sarah to get into huge fights and I was the cause of it. I feel so so guilty even though this happened in middle school. I ruined both of their grade 7 experiences because I felt the need to gain attention. I know that Sarah was traumatized because she didn’t expect me to betray her and ruin her year. It may not seem like a big deal but to me it’s heartbreaking to know that I was the reason behind a bad school year. I’ve apologized numerous times and both of them are fine now and said it doesn’t matter anymore and that i’m worrying too much for no reason. But it still haunts me that I did this. How could I? I never meant to hurt anyone, I was just being selfish and wanted attention like a 12 year old girl would want. But I can’t stand the fact that I did that. Both Lisa and Sarah seem to be all fine now but I don’t feel good at all. It seems selfish to only care about what I feel but I honestly don’t know how to live with this guilt. Any advice?
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    (Original post by AngelShark)
    I am in high school now but can’t let go of the guilt of what I had done in 7th grade. So basically, I had a friend who was very nice and I was extremely close with, named Sarah. I was also close friends with another girl named Lisa (using fake names). Sarah didn’t like Lisa and constantly talked about not liking her. At one point I also became upset at Lisa and decided to talk sh*t about her with Sarah. Later on, when my anger wore off, me and Lisa no longer were as close any more so in order to gain
    you never finished the story
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    (Original post by angrypoliceman)
    you never finished the story
    I’m sorry! It’s my first post and I messed up haha, it’s done now
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    (Original post by AngelShark)
    I am in high school now but can’t let go of the guilt of what I had done in 7th grade. So basically, I had a friend who was very nice and I was extremely close with, named Sarah. I was also close friends with another girl named Lisa (using fake names). Sarah didn’t like Lisa and constantly talked about not liking her. At one point I also became upset at Lisa and decided to talk sh*t about her with Sarah. Later on, when my anger wore off, me and Lisa no longer were as close any more so in order to gain attention from her, I told her all the stuff that Sarah had said about her. This lead Lisa and Sarah to get into huge fights and I was the cause of it. I feel so so guilty even though this happened in middle school. I ruined both of their grade 7 experiences because I felt the need to gain attention. I know that Sarah was traumatized because she didn’t expect me to betray her and ruin her year. It may not seem like a big deal but to me it’s heartbreaking to know that I was the reason behind a bad school year. I’ve apologized numerous times and both of them are fine now and said it doesn’t matter anymore and that i’m worrying too much for no reason. But it still haunts me that I did this. How could I? I never meant to hurt anyone, I was just being selfish and wanted attention like a 12 year old girl would want. But I can’t stand the fact that I did that. Both Lisa and Sarah seem to be all fine now but I don’t feel good at all. It seems selfish to only care about what I feel but I honestly don’t know how to live with this guilt. Any advice?
    Hi AngelShark! You are such a darling :-) There is one thing, though, that you need to know. In this life and this world, we have to forgive others as we forgive ourselves. The guilt feelings you have will not do you any good. Think of it as a learning experience.

    Let me tell you what I did when I was younger. Christine was my friend. Laurel was my friend. I stole Christine's and Laurel's boyfriends when I was 16. I was always guilty of that until Christine told me, when we were in our 20ish - she said - Hey, thank you for getting him away from me. If not for you, I wouldn't be pursuing my med degree now because of Don.

    So you know, there's a reason for everything. It's time to stop feeling guilty. Move on sweetie.
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    (Original post by cooltowering)
    Hi AngelShark! You are such a darling :-) There is one thing, though, that you need to know. In this life and this world, we have to forgive others as we forgive ourselves. The guilt feelings you have will not do you any good. Think of it as a learning experience.

    Let me tell you what I did when I was younger. Christine was my friend. Laurel was my friend. I stole Christine's and Laurel's boyfriends when I was 16. I was always guilty of that until Christine told me, when we were in our 20ish - she said - Hey, thank you for getting him away from me. If not for you, I wouldn't be pursuing my med degree now because of Don.

    So you know, there's a reason for everything. It's time to stop feeling guilty. Move on sweetie.
    Thank you so much! This is very helpful ❤️
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    anytime. :-)
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    Not that deep fam, apologise next time you see them
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    You said they apologised and they were fine.From now on,don't commit the same mistake again.You should learn to forgive yourself as you know you will never do it again..But I think it's good that you felt guilty and apologised. Some bullies don't even do that.
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    we all do stupid things when we're young. is age a justification? a little, so take comfort in that. it's okay to say you were young and stupid, we all were. what matters is you ask for forgiveness and admit your past mistakes. build on from there and let your present define you as a person.
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    you shouldn't feel guilty at all. You know what you did wrong and you've accepted that. you're not making excuses. i've been bullied, my friend's been bullied half the people i know have been bullied for something at some point. I never accepted the guys apologies because all he would say was something along the line of "im sorry but...." "i was wrong but..." "sorry about that but..." He had an excuse for everything but the fact that you can say i was wrong without justifying why you did it shows maturity and remorse. just don't do it again lel.
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    Ah this thread takes me back to my KS1 years, I miss those days so much
    In KS1 I was a bully and regret being one but hey, I was VERY young back then and tbh with you I thought me being a bully was a good thing. Obviously I was wrong.
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    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by AngelShark)
    I am in high school now but can’t let go of the guilt of what I had done in 7th grade. So basically, I had a friend who was very nice and I was extremely close with, named Sarah. I was also close friends with another girl named Lisa (using fake names). Sarah didn’t like Lisa and constantly talked about not liking her. At one point I also became upset at Lisa and decided to talk sh*t about her with Sarah. Later on, when my anger wore off, me and Lisa no longer were as close any more so in order to gain attention from her, I told her all the stuff that Sarah had said about her. This lead Lisa and Sarah to get into huge fights and I was the cause of it. I feel so so guilty even though this happened in middle school. I ruined both of their grade 7 experiences because I felt the need to gain attention. I know that Sarah was traumatized because she didn’t expect me to betray her and ruin her year. It may not seem like a big deal but to me it’s heartbreaking to know that I was the reason behind a bad school year. I’ve apologized numerous times and both of them are fine now and said it doesn’t matter anymore and that i’m worrying too much for no reason. But it still haunts me that I did this. How could I? I never meant to hurt anyone, I was just being selfish and wanted attention like a 12 year old girl would want. But I can’t stand the fact that I did that. Both Lisa and Sarah seem to be all fine now but I don’t feel good at all. It seems selfish to only care about what I feel but I honestly don’t know how to live with this guilt. Any advice?
    You were a kid. Kids makes mistakes. You've learnt from it though and I expect you are and will be a better person because of it.
    They seem to be doing fine now so if anything this has been a positive. You did something nasty, but it's not like at least one of them wasn't being nasty too- most kids are at some point. You've felt the guilt now and you know that it hurts to be mean. You can use this to make yourself better and maybe even as motivation to be more kind.

    Doing a bad thing does not make you a bad person. Don't label yourself for a mistake you made as a kid.
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    dude you were 12 or 13 then , everyone does stupid **** when they're young , you're much more mature now so just move on
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    Just don't repeat it. Better yourself

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    (Original post by AngelShark)
    I am in high school now but can’t let go of the guilt of what I had done in 7th grade. So basically, I had a friend who was very nice and I was extremely close with, named Sarah. I was also close friends with another girl named Lisa (using fake names). Sarah didn’t like Lisa and constantly talked about not liking her. At one point I also became upset at Lisa and decided to talk sh*t about her with Sarah. Later on, when my anger wore off, me and Lisa no longer were as close any more so in order to gain attention from her, I told her all the stuff that Sarah had said about her. This lead Lisa and Sarah to get into huge fights and I was the cause of it. I feel so so guilty even though this happened in middle school. I ruined both of their grade 7 experiences because I felt the need to gain attention. I know that Sarah was traumatized because she didn’t expect me to betray her and ruin her year. It may not seem like a big deal but to me it’s heartbreaking to know that I was the reason behind a bad school year. I’ve apologized numerous times and both of them are fine now and said it doesn’t matter anymore and that i’m worrying too much for no reason. But it still haunts me that I did this. How could I? I never meant to hurt anyone, I was just being selfish and wanted attention like a 12 year old girl would want. But I can’t stand the fact that I did that. Both Lisa and Sarah seem to be all fine now but I don’t feel good at all. It seems selfish to only care about what I feel but I honestly don’t know how to live with this guilt. Any advice?
    Hi I am from china,congratulations for your brave to tell what you fell anyway whatever good or bad.it is ok to face yourself,no one can avoid do something wrong in youth.Talk it to your friend is ok,and the other way is to find a secret place talking to yourself,speak out all you felling about it to yourself,your can argue with it just pour all you feeling out,may be this will help.
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    I think I found a picture of you
    Jokes aside. Get over it, it was in Y7 and move on. Simply learn from your mistakes and the mistakes of others and never be a snake again
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    (Original post by HusseinHussein)
    Not that deep fam, apologise next time you see them
    True, thank youuu
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    (Original post by tamil fever)
    You said they apologised and they were fine.From now on,don't commit the same mistake again.You should learn to forgive yourself as you know you will never do it again..But I think it's good that you felt guilty and apologised. Some bullies don't even do that.
    Thank you 💗💗
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    (Original post by Joel 96)
    we all do stupid things when we're young. is age a justification? a little, so take comfort in that. it's okay to say you were young and stupid, we all were. what matters is you ask for forgiveness and admit your past mistakes. build on from there and let your present define you as a person.
    Thank you! That’s helpful
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    (Original post by Cor395)
    you shouldn't feel guilty at all. You know what you did wrong and you've accepted that. you're not making excuses. i've been bullied, my friend's been bullied half the people i know have been bullied for something at some point. I never accepted the guys apologies because all he would say was something along the line of "im sorry but...." "i was wrong but..." "sorry about that but..." He had an excuse for everything but the fact that you can say i was wrong without justifying why you did it shows maturity and remorse. just don't do it again lel.
    Thank youuu!
 
 
 
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