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    So I have a recurring issue when it comes to relationships with girls. That is how I like to be is the complete opposite to how dating coaches and pick up artists say.

    At least in some senses for example pick up artists and dating coaches effectively say make the girl insecure. okay they don't say it like that but they say keep a girl guessing keep them wondering if your talking to other girls etc dont message them back right away. be dominant have the girl do things for you.

    after experience and observations I actually believe the pick up artists are onto something but its totally not how I like to be with girls.

    I like to spoil a girl and worship a girl. I like to put myself out there and do everything I can for them.
    This isn't an act of desperation or etc if I think all the advice I read says dont do this and I was desperate I would just go the alpha male route etc.

    Thing is I dont like bossing girls about and I dont like making girls feel insecure.
    I like making girls feel completely comfortable and secure and I like really putting myself out for a girl.

    hypothetically if a guy just decided not to focus on whether he succeeds or fails with the girl no mind games hard to get or easy to get etc, but simply went in with the idea of making the girl as happy as possible could that ever work?

    eg instead of i should wait to text back or I should text back right away because I want to appear hard to get or I want to chat to the girl the guy was thinking
    I should leave some space between my texts because the girl might be busy if they take time to reply and I dont want to pester them or I should text back right away so she can be comfortable and feel secure?

    I know that may be confusing but basically if i stopped worrying about succeeding or failing with a girl but focused only on how I think I can make them happy could that line of thinking work? I am so weird I will even risk losing a girl if I think that would make them happier am I destined to be alone do any girls want a guy who is focused to such an extent on their happiness?
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    A lot of people get bored very quickly of a yes-man gobshite, so be careful with that. Of course, some women want to be worshipped like that. I don't have it in me to be that way. Good luck to ya.
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    It depends on what kind of relationship you want. The "hard to get" strategy would only work for hook ups and short term relationships which some people want.
    I think if you want a serious relationship with the RIGHT person then no mind games because that's not very sustainable. Im not sure about 'worshipping' the person but just treat them right.
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    It depends on the girl's preference. Me at one stage would have liked a guy who kept me on my toes and kept me guessing, but as I've got older I've realised that these are not the type of men I'm after as I'd rather my relationship be more like a friendship than some chase game.

    Others may like that type of adventure in a relationship. It depends on the sort of relstionship and girl you're after. I'm guessing you want a more steady relation ship, which is fine, but not everyone may want it.
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    Just be yourself, there's no point otherwise. But retain self confidence and avoid being needy.
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    (Original post by Luke7456)
    So I have a recurring issue when it comes to relationships with girls. That is how I like to be is the complete opposite to how dating coaches and pick up artists say.

    At least in some senses for example pick up artists and dating coaches effectively say make the girl insecure. okay they don't say it like that but they say keep a girl guessing keep them wondering if your talking to other girls etc dont message them back right away. be dominant have the girl do things for you.

    after experience and observations I actually believe the pick up artists are onto something but its totally not how I like to be with girls.

    I like to spoil a girl and worship a girl. I like to put myself out there and do everything I can for them.
    This isn't an act of desperation or etc if I think all the advice I read says dont do this and I was desperate I would just go the alpha male route etc.

    Thing is I dont like bossing girls about and I dont like making girls feel insecure.
    I like making girls feel completely comfortable and secure and I like really putting myself out for a girl.

    hypothetically if a guy just decided not to focus on whether he succeeds or fails with the girl no mind games hard to get or easy to get etc, but simply went in with the idea of making the girl as happy as possible could that ever work?

    eg instead of i should wait to text back or I should text back right away because I want to appear hard to get or I want to chat to the girl the guy was thinking
    I should leave some space between my texts because the girl might be busy if they take time to reply and I dont want to pester them or I should text back right away so she can be comfortable and feel secure?

    I know that may be confusing but basically if i stopped worrying about succeeding or failing with a girl but focused only on how I think I can make them happy could that line of thinking work? I am so weird I will even risk losing a girl if I think that would make them happier am I destined to be alone do any girls want a guy who is focused to such an extent on their happiness?
    just be you and the right girl will fall for that. don't be to intent on making just her happy. make sure you are happy as well. x
 
 
 
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