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Not sure how I can help my friend or if he should seek professional help Watch

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    He is 25 and has been single for almost 4 years. His last relationship lasted for 1 year and ended because of the distance. I think he was really in love with her, and he says (and has said for the past 4 years) that he hasn't been able to develop feelings for anyone else since.

    There has been one girl in his life for almost 2 years; I think she had feelings for him but for him it was more just casual, and he said he was attracted to her but saw her more as a good friend and not interested in a relationship.

    He's always said he doesn't want a relationship, because he's not capable.

    He said his ex hurt him, though I don't think she cheated; I've never fully understood what happened. However, he told me that he is tired of being alone and would really like a relationship, but just isn't capable and cannot develop feelings for anyone.

    I think he seems pretty unhappy and I don't know what he should do. I've never known this kind of problem to this extent before and I know it took him a long time to get over the girl.

    He's only seen her once in 4 years and said they now only speak to wish each other a happy birthday.Part of me thinks he's still in love with her, but it's really not healthy, he really needs to move on after all this time, especially that she lives in another country and is with someone else.

    I'm just really worried for him and don't know how to help. Any advice? I wonder if perhaps he should seek therapy.. thanks.
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    I think its awesome that you are a caring and concerned friend-that is indeed a rare thing, a priceless thing, these days.

    I would say, however, the first step to your friend getting any sort of help is his own recognition of needing help, of being dysfunctional of not being in a good place and wanting better, and unless and until that recognition and admission comes, you will largely be spinning your wheels. He has to (your friend) want to admit to the problem and to get better and more importantly, be willing to take the steps necessary to get to that better place. Prayerfully, everything works out for the very best for him and for you-for being a good friend.


    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He is 25 and has been single for almost 4 years. His last relationship lasted for 1 year and ended because of the distance. I think he was really in love with her, and he says (and has said for the past 4 years) that he hasn't been able to develop feelings for anyone else since.

    There has been one girl in his life for almost 2 years; I think she had feelings for him but for him it was more just casual, and he said he was attracted to her but saw her more as a good friend and not interested in a relationship.

    He's always said he doesn't want a relationship, because he's not capable.

    He said his ex hurt him, though I don't think she cheated; I've never fully understood what happened. However, he told me that he is tired of being alone and would really like a relationship, but just isn't capable and cannot develop feelings for anyone.

    I think he seems pretty unhappy and I don't know what he should do. I've never known this kind of problem to this extent before and I know it took him a long time to get over the girl.

    He's only seen her once in 4 years and said they now only speak to wish each other a happy birthday.Part of me thinks he's still in love with her, but it's really not healthy, he really needs to move on after all this time, especially that she lives in another country and is with someone else.

    I'm just really worried for him and don't know how to help. Any advice? I wonder if perhaps he should seek therapy.. thanks.
 
 
 
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