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    I'm not sure whether this belongs in mental health, but seeming as though it's a problem that has been out of control and is something I struggle with daily, I thought maybe it would be a good place.

    My original situation was a far from uncommon one - Cambridge was my dream uni since I was very young. Though coming from a disadvantaged background I was passionate about my subject, and it came across in most forms - exam grades, super-curriculars, my personal statement, etc. I was absolutely thrilled at even being invited to interview, and so was my entire family knowing how it had been my dream since I was a fetus. (And to be honest, today I'm not even really sure why. Sure, it's an amazing university. But there are other universities that are just as amazing. I loved the course I wanted to apply for, but I think it was just the pretty architecture that got me tbh)

    But having had this dream for so long and feeling as though my life culminated into one climactic 25 minute interview, I placed an extreme amount of pressure on myself and basically psyched myself out and performed horribly. On top of this I had serious family health issues going on a few days before my interview and my mind was not in the right place. Just thinking of my interview makes me physically cringe, because I was not myself. Understandably, I was not given an offer.

    I decided against gap year and I am now at another uni; I am so grateful for attending another world class school, and the opportunity I have to even pursue higher education. But it's been almost 10 months since receiving my rejection and I think about it every single day. I don't cry every day, but I always get this numb feeling and pure regret at the thought that I messed up my own dream. Every night I ask myself what would have happened if I hadn't been so nervous, my thoughts so scrambled because of what was going on in my life. I literally had everything in the bag (per my feedback) it was just my ridiculous interview that damaged my application. Recently I had to get a physical examination done for sport at my uni and I was told I had high blood pressure - which does not run in my family and I am of good health. I can't help but think it might be because of this.

    I am posting because it is normal to be disappointed after a uni rejection. What isn't normal is being extremely depressed about it for 10 months. I feel the same way I felt when I first got my rejection; none of my emotions have died down. Obviously life isn't fair and it is a good lesson in that respect, but reminding myself of that doesn't seem to be a good enough solution.

    Should I speak with a therapist/mental health counselor about this? If anyone here has had this situation too, what did you do?
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    I don’t know if Cambridge does post grad courses but you could always consider on of those if they do ?
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    (Original post by covfefeaddict)
    I'm not sure whether this belongs in mental health, but seeming as though it's a problem that has been out of control and is something I struggle with daily, I thought maybe it would be a good place.

    My original situation was a far from uncommon one - Cambridge was my dream uni since I was very young. Though coming from a disadvantaged background I was passionate about my subject, and it came across in most forms - exam grades, super-curriculars, my personal statement, etc. I was absolutely thrilled at even being invited to interview, and so was my entire family knowing how it had been my dream since I was a fetus. (And to be honest, today I'm not even really sure why. Sure, it's an amazing university. But there are other universities that are just as amazing. I loved the course I wanted to apply for, but I think it was just the pretty architecture that got me tbh)

    But having had this dream for so long and feeling as though my life culminated into one climactic 25 minute interview, I placed an extreme amount of pressure on myself and basically psyched myself out and performed horribly. On top of this I had serious family health issues going on a few days before my interview and my mind was not in the right place. Just thinking of my interview makes me physically cringe, because I was not myself. Understandably, I was not given an offer.

    I decided against gap year and I am now at another uni; I am so grateful for attending another world class school, and the opportunity I have to even pursue higher education. But it's been almost 10 months since receiving my rejection and I think about it every single day. I don't cry every day, but I always get this numb feeling and pure regret at the thought that I messed up my own dream. Every night I ask myself what would have happened if I hadn't been so nervous, my thoughts so scrambled because of what was going on in my life. I literally had everything in the bag (per my feedback) it was just my ridiculous interview that damaged my application. Recently I had to get a physical examination done for sport at my uni and I was told I had high blood pressure - which does not run in my family and I am of good health. I can't help but think it might be because of this.

    I am posting because it is normal to be disappointed after a uni rejection. What isn't normal is being extremely depressed about it for 10 months. I feel the same way I felt when I first got my rejection; none of my emotions have died down. Obviously life isn't fair and it is a good lesson in that respect, but reminding myself of that doesn't seem to be a good enough solution.

    Should I speak with a therapist/mental health counselor about this? If anyone here has had this situation too, what did you do?
    I think my situation is a little different, but I felt, and am still feeling the same thing ever since I broke up with my girlfriend half a year ago. You should definitely talk to someone about it. Also, have you ever considered transferring or doing grad school at Cambridge? You can always aim for these two options.
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    (Original post by covfefeaddict)
    I'm not sure whether this belongs in mental health, but seeming as though it's a problem that has been out of control and is something I struggle with daily, I thought maybe it would be a good place.

    My original situation was a far from uncommon one - Cambridge was my dream uni since I was very young. Though coming from a disadvantaged background I was passionate about my subject, and it came across in most forms - exam grades, super-curriculars, my personal statement, etc. I was absolutely thrilled at even being invited to interview, and so was my entire family knowing how it had been my dream since I was a fetus. (And to be honest, today I'm not even really sure why. Sure, it's an amazing university. But there are other universities that are just as amazing. I loved the course I wanted to apply for, but I think it was just the pretty architecture that got me tbh)

    But having had this dream for so long and feeling as though my life culminated into one climactic 25 minute interview, I placed an extreme amount of pressure on myself and basically psyched myself out and performed horribly. On top of this I had serious family health issues going on a few days before my interview and my mind was not in the right place. Just thinking of my interview makes me physically cringe, because I was not myself. Understandably, I was not given an offer.

    I decided against gap year and I am now at another uni; I am so grateful for attending another world class school, and the opportunity I have to even pursue higher education. But it's been almost 10 months since receiving my rejection and I think about it every single day. I don't cry every day, but I always get this numb feeling and pure regret at the thought that I messed up my own dream. Every night I ask myself what would have happened if I hadn't been so nervous, my thoughts so scrambled because of what was going on in my life. I literally had everything in the bag (per my feedback) it was just my ridiculous interview that damaged my application. Recently I had to get a physical examination done for sport at my uni and I was told I had high blood pressure - which does not run in my family and I am of good health. I can't help but think it might be because of this.

    I am posting because it is normal to be disappointed after a uni rejection. What isn't normal is being extremely depressed about it for 10 months. I feel the same way I felt when I first got my rejection; none of my emotions have died down. Obviously life isn't fair and it is a good lesson in that respect, but reminding myself of that doesn't seem to be a good enough solution.

    Should I speak with a therapist/mental health counselor about this? If anyone here has had this situation too, what did you do?
    I had never been in your situation (although I may be in the future) but I really understand what you are feeling. It must have been such a a disappointment not to get in and I sympathize fully, but I think you need to look at this logically. You are upset because you didn't get in, there are two ways to relieve the distress you are feeling, either get in to Cambridge, or leave it behind. If you want to try again for it then you could try to enter as a mature student.
    If not, there really isn't anything to do but forget about it and focus on your present situation. Give counselling a go if you think it will help, but ultimately you have to make the decision to let go.
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    Thank you all for your responses and sympathy, it really does make me feel better I think the most frustrating thing is just knowing that I don't even actually believe the things I said in interview, I literally just said them because I was unable to think. I kind of want to write a letter to my interviewers explaining everything I would have said if I actually had brains in the moment, but I don't want them to think I'm insane.

    (Original post by LucyGallagher98)
    I don’t know if Cambridge does post grad courses but you could always consider on of those if they do ?
    (Original post by derpylasagna)
    I think my situation is a little different, but I felt, and am still feeling the same thing ever since I broke up with my girlfriend half a year ago. You should definitely talk to someone about it. Also, have you ever considered transferring or doing grad school at Cambridge? You can always aim for these two options.
    derpylasagna I'm sorry about your break up - that's one of the hardest things to "get over". I have considered reapplying, I decided against it because of date conflicts but if I am truly unhappy after this year in uni and I am positive that I want to study political science at a deeper level, I think I will apply again next year.

    Grad school is an idea I use to comfort myself when I feel like my chance at studying at Cambridge is over, so it's always an option I think it's just that a lot of people claim that grad courses at Oxbridge are considered money-makers and aren't as good as Bachelor's degrees that puts me off, but I would love to pursue graduate school at Cams if I didn't end up transferring.

    (Original post by Spoderman:))
    I had never been in your situation (although I may be in the future) but I really understand what you are feeling. It must have been such a a disappointment not to get in and I sympathize fully, but I think you need to look at this logically. You are upset because you didn't get in, there are two ways to relieve the distress you are feeling, either get in to Cambridge, or leave it behind. If you want to try again for it then you could try to enter as a mature student.
    If not, there really isn't anything to do but forget about it and focus on your present situation. Give counselling a go if you think it will help, but ultimately you have to make the decision to let go.
    Are you a uni applicant? Don't let my situation scare you - my experience was still super fun, and the #1 thing I've learned from my experience and you can learn too is to not "psych" yourself out; literally just go into an interview knowing you'll do your best, and you're not there to prove yourself but to show interviews how passionate and interested you are in your subject. I appreciate your logical approach. I think I will consider the possibility of applying as a mature student if I'm positive I want to transfer/apply next year, or I will think about applying for that unique "affiliate student" program, in which I basically undertake a second Bachelor's degree. Either way, I'm grateful for your response and it's made me realize that it's not the end of the road. Good luck with your uni applications, you're going to do great!
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    (Original post by covfefeaddict)
    I'm not sure whether this belongs in mental health, but seeming as though it's a problem that has been out of control and is something I struggle with daily, I thought maybe it would be a good place.

    My original situation was a far from uncommon one - Cambridge was my dream uni since I was very young. Though coming from a disadvantaged background I was passionate about my subject, and it came across in most forms - exam grades, super-curriculars, my personal statement, etc. I was absolutely thrilled at even being invited to interview, and so was my entire family knowing how it had been my dream since I was a fetus. (And to be honest, today I'm not even really sure why. Sure, it's an amazing university. But there are other universities that are just as amazing. I loved the course I wanted to apply for, but I think it was just the pretty architecture that got me tbh)

    But having had this dream for so long and feeling as though my life culminated into one climactic 25 minute interview, I placed an extreme amount of pressure on myself and basically psyched myself out and performed horribly. On top of this I had serious family health issues going on a few days before my interview and my mind was not in the right place. Just thinking of my interview makes me physically cringe, because I was not myself. Understandably, I was not given an offer.

    I decided against gap year and I am now at another uni; I am so grateful for attending another world class school, and the opportunity I have to even pursue higher education. But it's been almost 10 months since receiving my rejection and I think about it every single day. I don't cry every day, but I always get this numb feeling and pure regret at the thought that I messed up my own dream. Every night I ask myself what would have happened if I hadn't been so nervous, my thoughts so scrambled because of what was going on in my life. I literally had everything in the bag (per my feedback) it was just my ridiculous interview that damaged my application. Recently I had to get a physical examination done for sport at my uni and I was told I had high blood pressure - which does not run in my family and I am of good health. I can't help but think it might be because of this.

    I am posting because it is normal to be disappointed after a uni rejection. What isn't normal is being extremely depressed about it for 10 months. I feel the same way I felt when I first got my rejection; none of my emotions have died down. Obviously life isn't fair and it is a good lesson in that respect, but reminding myself of that doesn't seem to be a good enough solution.

    Should I speak with a therapist/mental health counselor about this? If anyone here has had this situation too, what did you do?
    Honestly, not completely over my Oxbridge rejection either so I feel you and it was my interview that brought me down as well :console: I only truly made "peace" with it a month ago.

    I don't have great suggestions as to how to deal with it other than saying that telling yourself that life isn't fair isn't best solution. For me, it is probably helpful that so many things has happened since then that has made me realise that my Oxbridge rejection is the least I should be worried and upset about

    I hope you find yourself in a better place, OP Remember that if you have a dream, you have to think farther to achieve your goals... even if it takes you longer to get there. As cliche as this may sound, life is very long and when you look back upon this experience in the future, I hope it will not be the experience that brought you down. I hope it will be the experience that spurred you on to bigger and better things.

    Promise yourself that you will not let the label "Oxbridge Reject" define you as a person/ take over your life. Easier said than done I know :sadnod: but I know you can do it *^O^*

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